Sunday, May 28, 2023

A sniper's struggle with PTSD

'You deny, deny, deny until it becomes untenable': A sniper's struggle with PTSD

Watch the video on CNN
Kyle Prellberg was deployed twice to Iraq and Afghanistan between 2009 and 2012. When he got home to the United States, a whole new war began.

Why should you watch the video about a sniper struggling with #PTSD if you aren't one? Why would it matter to you if weren't a sniper? The thing is if you ended up with PTSD from serving, it should matter to you. 

Most of the time they are part of a unit but they are trained, aside from the obvious to hit the person they aim at, to be focused for however long it takes to achieve the mission. They do that part alone.

Nowhere is it written they, or you must try to heal all alone. No one heals alone.

You don't and shouldn't have to fight the battle as a survivor to heal alone. Doing it alone does not work. Holding it in, trying to cover the scars you carry and the burden on your back will only cause you to push people away when you need them in your life the most. The people around you are your unit to fight this battle as much as you had others helping you fight the battles in combat. This isn't a battle to save the lives of others or those deployed with you. This is a battle to save your life so that you can help others find hope. In this battle, you fight with the courage to open your mouth and speak the simple words that you need help. You fight it with the weapon of knowledge, knowing that PTSD is not a sign of weakness or any kind of punishment. No one can punish you more than you are doing to yourself. PTSD is not something you were born with. It is something that you survived the cause of, no matter what that cause was. YOU ARE A SURVIVOR of it. Find strength in that.

If you take nothing else away from the video about Kyle Prellberg, let the fact that he suffered until he sought help to heal and know that he is passing that on to others so they, and you can find healing too!

Kathie Costos author of Ministers Of The Mystery Series The Scribe of Salem The Visionary Of Salem and 13th Minister Of Salem

Saturday, May 27, 2023

The Scribe Of Salem not written to make church people comfy

Wounded Times
Kathie Costos
May 27, 2023

How many times have you read a review and wondered what was behind it? The answer in this review, while mostly positive, the reviewer wrote that the characters were so well developed that "I felt like I knew them," but then wrote how they didn't seem real because of all the scriptures. Guess it made sense to the reviewer as a person with a minister in the family. The thing is, the Ministers Of The Mystery Series was not intended to make church people comfortable. It is intended to open a world where love and miracles still exist, even for those who never set foot in a church, or feel they didn't belong there.
When a religion based on love and miracles is used against people they hate it becomes a war of powers.
This is the review that shows not all "religious" people feel the same way. Consider I was one of them believing that the Greek Orthodox faith was the right one, and everyone else was wrong. I grew up to notice what all of them had in common and how the man-made rules had nothing to do with uniting but causing the diving. I was the Administrator of Christian Education for a Presbyterian church and wanted to focus on what the two faiths had in common but some saw only the difference between them and me. One of my best friends is a Presbyterian minister. (She loved the book by the way.) She preaches on YouTube with Musings of a Preacher Lady as a sci-fi lover as well as pastor of a church in Texas. Others do not view scriptures the same way.
Reviewed by Jamie Michele for Readers' Favorite ****
In the first book of the Christian fiction series Ministers Of The Mystery, The Scribe of Salem by Kathie Costos, protagonist Chris Papadopoulos ventures to Salem, Massachusetts to pay tribute to a deceased friend with others who knew him well. He meets with longtime friends from when he was a journalist and war correspondent, one of whom tells him an old flame with a troubled history named Brenda has died. Chris is at a crossroads and is introduced to Mandy, a theological savant who Chris connects with on multiple levels. Chris becomes the unlikely beneficiary of an inheritance, relocates to Salem, and reinvents himself as an outstanding novelist. Mandy serves as his inspiration, and Chris is driven by prayer and devotion to God. His friends share the same view and spread messages bound in scripture and earthly angels for the betterment of others. Everything is on the ascent for Chris until an extortion plot dredges up a former relationship that rocks him to the core. “On the night I needed it the most, miracles walked into my life one after another.” 
The Scribe of Salem by Kathie Costos puts the transcendent nature of pure belief at the core with an openly evangelical story and a cast of characters who have experienced their own miracles. The standout to me is a friend and bartender named Ed who is arguably the starting point in Chris's spiritual pilgrimage. Costos develops her characters thoroughly so I felt like I knew them. However, despite this, I struggled with their not coming across as real people. Their discussions were almost entirely scripture based and even as a reader with a proud, devout Baptist minister in my immediate family, the way the characters spoke came across to me as awkward. That said, the plot points are good, the pandemic setting in New England lends to the atmosphere, and Chris is a character we do want to root for. At the end of the day, those are the qualities that round it all out.
The scriptures used are buried in the dialog; if you read it as an eBook, there are links to show where it came from. Almost all of them are not ones you'll hear in a church sermon. Even if you did, you may not have thought about the meaning behind those words.

Think of the Bible as a spiritual book instead of a "religious" one. Religion is what divides the one faith Jesus came to share. Humans used all His love as the power to hold over others. That message was abundantly clear during the Salem Witchcraft trials along with all the other times religion was used to either convert or destroy instead of comfort and empower. 

When your life seems like one endless series of doom and gloom trying to take over, and you do not know the truth about what it all means, it is easy to blame God instead of other humans doing what they can to use your pain for their own gain. When you know the power is all within you to change your life, as well as the lives of others, that is a miracle.

Reviewed by Asher Syed for Readers' Favorite *****
The Scribe of Salem: Ministers Of The Mystery by Kathie Costos is a Christian fiction novel that revolves around Chris Papadopoulos, a former war reporter. In Salem, Massachusetts, Chris reunites with his friend Bill Gibson and learns of the death of Bill's sister Brenda. Chris joins his military comrades to honor their fallen comrade, discovering an intriguing woman named Mandy. Chris embarks on a transformative journey, seeking help from Mandy to regain control of his life. Inspired by their encounters and encouraged by friends, Chris finds the strength to write a book that becomes a bestseller, offering solace during the trying times of a pandemic. Chris finds unexpected fame in a series of events that catapult him into a public recognition, but when Chris faces a harrowing blackmail attempt, both how strong his faith in God is and how solid his group of friends is are tested to their fullest.

The parallels between the persecution of witches and the persecution of open Christians set the foundational theme in The Scribe of Salem by Kathy Costos. The novel is a no-holds-barred story of faith and will resonate well with readers who enjoy Christian fiction in a way where scripture and conversational sermons run through almost every scene, as opposed to the more nuanced approach that is found in most fiction within the same genre. Costos' style might not be as elegant, but it certainly does get the message across. I liked the contemporary setting and the way the characters are confronted with incidents surrounding COVID-19 protocols. As an observer, these feel really authentic and do well in exploring the group's unique contributions in the fight against chaos and darkness, to which the pandemic adds an additional layer, and realizing the profound impact of their connections and gifts. The full circle that the ending brings is satisfying in that there is closure; a relief given the possibility of a book in a series ending with a cliffhanger. Recommended.

You may think you are powerless to change things. You may think you are only one person and can't do much at all. Think again on both parts especially if you have PTSD. Too many miracles have already happened because someone decided to take one more try at healing and then healed more than he ever dreamed of.

If you want to know what Ministers of the Mystery have to tell you, read The Scribe Of Salem and begin your own journey to using the gifts you already have inside of you!




Sunday, May 21, 2023

What do they need to hear?

Wounded Times
Kathie Costos
May 18, 2023

Sometimes it isn't what they want to hear. The thing is, it is always what they need to hear.


The Shock

When you transitioned from your normal life, into the victim, and onto survivor, those were massive changes to deal with.

First, there is the shock that it happened to you. One moment you were just like everyone else. Or was it just how you assumed everyone was? The reality is, everyone has a backstory that you didn't know. And now, most people won't know what your backstory is unless you tell them.

How do you do that? How do you explain to them how your life changed without warning and so did you? It may frighten them because suddenly they become aware their life can also change without warning too.

As you go through the changes of PTSD, the people in your life do as well.

The Denial
They want to deny it changed you almost as much as you do.

You left your house and the people in your life as they always knew you to be, but returned to them as a survivor. They are confused. They don't understand what it is like for you. Some may want to give you time to return to how you were. You may expect that too. Some will want to give you space and leave you alone to "deal" with it. That may be what you want too.

A time comes when they expect you to just "get over it" so everyone can go back to the way things were before. They get tired of hearing about it. You get tired of trying to explain to them something they will never fully understand unless it happens to them. It is worse when you don't understand it either.

How do you find the words to communicate what they need to hear? You start by finding the words you need to hear for yourself to understand. There are over 40 years of research online now and even more books you can find that were out there longer you can find. There are videos online to help you, not just understand, but to find comfort in the simple fact you are not alone.

Things change when you change the conversation you have with them.

In The Scribe Of Salem, that is how lives were changed for all the characters in the book.
Reviewed by Parul Sood for Readers' Favorite The Scribe of Salem: Ministers of the Mystery by Kathie Costos is an enthralling debut in a series that seamlessly blends fantasy, supernatural horror, and elements of spirituality. The story follows Chris, a former war journalist grappling with PTSD from his fieldwork and a turbulent marriage that subjected him to abuse. Struggling to find purpose and often drowning his sorrows in alcohol, Chris's life takes an unexpected turn when he reconnects with an old friend, sparking a newfound hope. As Chris engages in conversations and encounters that seem divinely guided, he begins to believe that a higher power is watching over him and urging him to seek out Mandy—a healer who has transformed his friend's life. Fueled by this belief, Chris embarks on a quest to find Mandy, not only to document her spiritual teachings in a book but also in the hope of transforming his own life.

In The Scribe of Salem, Kathie Costos skillfully weaves a narrative that delves into Chris's struggles and his journey toward healing and self-discovery. The author's exploration of spirituality goes beyond conventional religious boundaries, inviting readers to contemplate the profound power of faith in oneself and in the presence of something greater. Through Chris's meeting with Mandy, readers are taken on a captivating journey that merges supernatural horror with the themes of redemption, personal growth, and the transformative nature of spiritual experiences. The characters in The Scribe of Salem are vividly depicted and elicit empathy from readers. Chris's emotional journey resonates deeply as he confronts his past traumas and seeks solace and meaning in a world that often feels bleak. Costos's adept characterization brings authenticity and relatability to the story, allowing readers to connect with the protagonist on his quest for redemption.
Every single one of them had to find the courage to tell their backstory. They could offer hope because someone took the time to give it to them. It is a healing chain passed on from one to another, quietly, without seeking anything for themselves. The only thing they wanted was to pass on what was given to them.

So what is it people need to hear from you? They can't help you if they do not know what you need. They will only make assumptions about what you are going through, and most of the time, it comes out negatively. With understanding, help can come elevating needless turmoil and restoring hope. None of it can happen until you decide to say what you don't want to, so they can hear what they need to.

Thursday, May 11, 2023

13th Minister Of Salem "accomplished paranormal chiller to devour."


There are many goals authors have when they write a book. By the time we're finished, we hope we achieved everything we intended to do. When the 13th Minister Of Salem was finished, I was satisfied with the results. I hoped someone else would feel the same way. After all, it's a big book with 328 pages.

I wanted to tell stories we all know differently to, not only change the conversation but to help people see how much power they have within themself to make a difference. That put the 13th Minister Of Salem into what publishers consider a genre-bender.
genre-bending (uncountable) The subversion of tropes associated with a particular artistic genre or the synthesis of multiple genres.
I always viewed myself as a heretic while my older brother called me a witch. There is an ongoing joke in my family centered on this including being given a baby broom in the crib. When our daughter was little and we were taking a trip to Salem, she said we were going to visit my relatives. I had to remind her that if they were mine, then they were hers too. 

Salem has always been close to my heart and so was my spiritual connection to God. I viewed the history of the witch accusations in a different way from the rest of my family. I couldn't just look at all the horror inflicted upon innocent people. I had to see past the suffering to consider what happened when people stood up against the mob rule and put the trials to an end. That was a goal I had to achieve.

I attended the church my family went to, but I reached out to God more often on my own. Yes, I am Christian, because I do believe Jesus was and is the Son Of God. I do not agree with the division of what He started with all the manmade rules. Churchgoers tend to see their chosen affiliation as the only right one. All that is fine because God gave all of us free will to make our own choices. 

In the process of all this, I read the Bible on my own and found it filled with love, power, and many things I never heard preached in church. Sharing what is there few have heard was another goal I wanted to accomplish.

There were several others along with wanting to expand the target audience, but not the reason you may be expecting. I wanted to reach more people to let them know something else that society has gotten wrong. The survivors of events causing PTSD are not what they think they are. They are not all veterans. They are not someone to feel sorry for. They don't have to feel helpless or hopeless. They are not weak. They are not defective or any other label they have been given especially the victim label. They, including me, are survivors!

Considering the review I received from Readers' Favorite, I achieved what I set out to do. I cried when I read it because I also achieved more than I hoped for!

Marketability: 5
Marketability refers to how effectively you wrote your book for your target audience. Authors may include content that is above or below the understanding of their target reader, or include concepts, opinions, or language that can accidentally confuse or alienate some readers. Although by its nature this rating is very subjective, a very low rating here and poor reviews may indicate an issue with your book in this area.
Overall Opinion: 5
The overall starred rating takes into account all these elements and describes the overall reading experience of your reviewer. This is the official Readers' Favorite review rating for your book.
Reviewed by K.C. Finn for Readers' Favorite 5-stars

"I recommend 13th Minister Of Salem to fans of the existing series as another accomplished paranormal chiller to devour."

Penned by Kathie Costos, 13th Minister Of Salem is a work in the supernatural horror, suspense, and gothic drama subgenres, forming the third installment in the Ministers Of The Mystery series. It is best suited to mature adult readers owing to its dark content and adult situations. In this profoundly intriguing continuation of the series, we find ourselves back with Chris as word of his achievements and talents has spread, but this only leads to more trouble for our hero. Trying to get married would be hard enough without the constant death threats from the cult of the now-defeated Haman Cain, let alone the Master’s warning that his end-time is drawing near.

Kathie Costos brings us back into the world of gothic suspense, deep drama, and a chilling thriller with a bang in this third installment in the series. 
I found myself deeply involved in Chris’s psychological storyline. We see the painfully realistic damage that his adventures, battles, and triumphs have left him with over the events of the first two novels. 
I felt his pain, isolation, and pressure deep in my soul; such is the efficacy of Costos’s intimate narrative, thought, and speech portrayal. 
The darkest elements of the work are also well-handled to avoid being gratuitous but remain chilling to the core. I recommend 13th Minister Of Salem to fans of the existing series as another accomplished paranormal chiller to devour.

Discover more here 

Wednesday, May 10, 2023

Have you lost hope that people can change?

Wounded Times
Kathie Costos
May 10, 2023


Michelangelo, conversione di saulo, 1542-45, 10,1.jpg
These are troubling times we live in. That is one thing most of us agree on. It is easy to lose hope that people can change and want to repair the rift instead of making it wider and deeper. The problem is not in the fact it happened but in our own desire to change what is.

Impossible Transformations: How Do People Change?
People’s Minds Are Often Not Led By Reason or Facts
Research shows that, despite public belief, people’s minds are often not led by reason or facts. Instead, forces like confirmation bias and group membership shape their judgment and belief systems. TedX
The article went on to add,
“Agreeing with the group stimulates the reward pathway; trying to defy the group stimulates many of the same brain regions that fire during drug withdrawal,” the article states. This stimulation explains why and how people can believe so strongly in anti-science beliefs that are supported by group membership rather than founded on fact or reason.
People can change and we've seen evidence of that in negative as well as positive ways.

In the same article, there was this video worth watching if you are seeking some proof.
Gerardo Lopez grew up in gang territory in Los Angeles, California, and was just 14 years old when he joined MS-13, the notorious Salvadorian gang. Why did he join and why did he leave? In this courageous talk, Gerardo reveals how we can help others get out and stay out of gangs. Gerardo "Clever" Lopez has worked in gang intervention for over two decades. Formerly of the notorious Los Angeles gang MS-13, Gerardo escaped gang life and now ensures that at-risk youth from making the same mistakes. He is the Executive Director of the Denver chapter of Homies Unidos, a nonprofit dedicated to ending violence and promoting peace through gang intervention and prevention. Gerardo is an avid baseball fan waiting for the Dodgers to win the World Series, and the subject of the award-winning, short documentary CLEVER. This talk was given at a TEDx event using the TED conference format but independently organized by a local community.

If you want more, then a perfect example of this is Saul of Tarsus. Most people know him as Saint Paul. He went on the preach to and reach the Gentiles. None of what he accomplished would have been possible if God and Jesus gave up on him. They knew his soul and his intentions well enough to keep trying to get through to him.

He was hunting down followers of Jesus after He returned to heaven. He went with "group membership" and was regarded as heroic in his endeavors to eradicate the heretical believers. According to all accounts, he was filled with joy as they were being executed.

Saul Makes Trouble for the Church
At that time the church in Jerusalem suffered terribly. All of the Lord's followers, except the apostles, were scattered everywhere in Judea and Samaria. 3 Saul started making a lot of trouble for the church. He went from house to house, arresting men and women and putting them in jail.
He was convinced that the group of people he belonged to were right and it was all reinforced by his belief that he was serving God. After all, his friends admired him and his dedication to killing off the followers of Jesus. That is until he was made to understand how blind he was on the road to Damascus.
The Damascus Road: Saul Converted
9 Then Saul, still breathing threats and murder against the disciples of the Lord, went to the high priest 2 and asked letters from him to the synagogues of Damascus, so that if he found any who were of the Way, whether men or women, he might bring them bound to Jerusalem.

3 As he journeyed he came near Damascus, and suddenly a light shone around him from heaven. 4 Then he fell to the ground, and heard a voice saying to him, “Saul, Saul, why are you persecuting Me?”

5 And he said, “Who are You, Lord?”

Then the Lord said, “I am Jesus, whom you are persecuting. It is hard for you to kick against the goads.”

6 So he, trembling and astonished, said, “Lord, what do You want me to do?”

Then the Lord said to him, “Arise and go into the city, and you will be told what you must do.”

7 And the men who journeyed with him stood speechless, hearing a voice but seeing no one. 8 Then Saul arose from the ground, and when his eyes were opened he saw no one. But they led him by the hand and brought him into Damascus. 9 And he was three days without sight, and neither ate nor drank.

After he was able to see clearly, most of the people he knew turned against him as he turned closer to God and what he was supposed to do, and was forgiven for all he had done. Was he perfect afterward? No. God does not require perfection from anyone.

All this goes to show that human nature has not changed since the beginning of time. Our thoughts have changed. Our beliefs changed. Our view of the world changed. What has not changed is our ability to change ourselves.

No matter how rotten you see others, consider the simple fact that people doing bad things make the news no matter where you live. There are still more good people in the world and many of them, as you watched in the video above, changed their ways and then went on to help others find their way to change as well. It is all choices we make to do or ignore.

People, like Saul, were led to believe the lies and it was up to him to believe the truth or insist on following the mob rulers and make people suffer for the lies they spread.

What do you do when you need to choose between what you know is right, truthful, and honorable while everyone you know acts against what you know in your soul is wrong and terrible? Do you find the courage to stand up and walk away from them or do you stay with them while they continue to infect your soul? Are you avoiding allowing the miracle that is waiting for you to make you the best person you can be?