Gabrielle Giffords Serves Thanksgiving Meal At Arizona Air Base

Gabrielle Giffords Serves Thanksgiving Meal At Arizona Air Base
MATT YORK and BOB CHRISTIE
11/24/11
TUCSON, Ariz. — U.S. Rep. Gabrielle Giffords helped serve a Thanksgiving meal to service members and retirees at a military base in her hometown of Tucson, Ariz.

Giffords arrived in the dining hall at Davis-Monthan Air Force Base at midday Thursday wearing a ball cap and an apron with her nickname of "Gabby" sewn on the front. She was accompanied by her retired astronaut husband, Mark Kelly, who also donned an apron.

Giffords used only her left hand as she served, a sign that physical damage remains from the injuries she suffered when she was shot in January.
read more here

Community takes in 300 single Marines for holiday

Community takes in Marines for holiday
November 24, 2011 3:51 AM
HOPE HODGE - DAILY NEWS STAFF
More than 300 single Marines from Camp Lejeune will have a place to go for Thanksgiving, thanks to nearby communities and businesses that want to show their gratitude.

Camp Lejeune Single Marine Program coordinator Susan Goodrich said she was asked to place many more Marines at a holiday meal this year than she has in years previous.

“We’ve added some new communities, and the outlying areas that have contacted me this year have expanded out even more,” she said.

In addition to the River Landing community in Wallace and Fairfield Harbour in New Bern, which have taken Marines in for a day of dinner and relaxation for the last few years, two businesses in Wilmington are making sure troops have a meal.

Carolyn Atkinson, owner of Wilmington’s Flying Pi Kitchen, said she knew when she opened for business this year that she would always have troops at her Thanksgiving table.

“My son was in the Marine Corps. He was stationed at Camp Lejeune for awhile, and he was hosted in the Jacksonville area by a family for Thanksgiving,” Atkinson said. “When I opened my restaurant I decided that as long as I have a kitchen there would be Marines fed in my restaurant for Thanksgiving.
read more here

There are over 6,000 families spending this Thanksgiving with one less member

There are people getting ready to sit down to a big Thanksgiving feast today and planning where to go for Black Friday to get the best deals for Christmas shopping. They have very little room for thoughts of the people lining up to get a meal from volunteers holding off their own dinners to provide what very well may be the only good meal the poor will have all week.

Families gather together looking at all the food on the table and wondering who will be the first to start an argument or when the nasty one of the relatives will make some kind of remark making everyone uncomfortable.

There are also families across this country looking at an empty chair and wondering what they could have done differently so that the family member would be able to join them one more year.

When a serviceman or woman dies in combat, it seems a death to be honored but when they die because of suicide it is a death that leaves regret.

I know the feeling. Years ago my husband's nephew committed suicide. He was a Vietnam Vet with PTSD. I couldn't save him and no matter how hard I tried, I just couldn't help him. He didn't want to listen, but worse, he didn't want to talk. To this day I wonder what I could have done differently but more now, I wonder why he didn't do things differently. Why did he choose to try to hide his pain instead of asking for help from the VA doctors treating him? Why didn't he talk to my husband or to me instead of checking himself in a motel room with enough heroin to kill ten men? Why didn't he talk to his girlfriend or to his brother? Was he in so much pain that no one else mattered to him anymore?

There are over 6,000 families spending this Thanksgiving with one less member of the family because of combat and suicide. Those are just the numbers we know about since they had a VA claim and were tracked by the VA but there are more. The latest report is one veteran suicide every 80 minutes. The DOD has their own count but you have to add them up since the Marines have their numbers, the Army has their's and then the Reservists and National Guards numbers come in separately. If the man or woman are discharged, they are not on the DOD counts and if they do not have a VA claim, they are not on their counts either. They will and forever will be on the counts of the family members facing an empty chair.

I found this piece this morning and it offers some support for family members left behind. It is never easy when some dies due to natural causes but when you add in combat, while you may think about it happening due to the dangerous jobs they have, you are never really ready for it. When it comes to suicides after they are supposed to be out of danger, it is something that you are never really over but you can stop torturing yourself because of how they decided to end their suffering.

Santa Clara County averages one suicide every three days

By Mary Gottschalk

Posted: 11/23/2011
Suicide is central to the plot of that most popular holiday film It's A Wonderful Life. Shakespeare romanticized it in Romeo and Juliet, and to some extent, so did the life-ending choices of musician Kurt Cobain as well as writers Sylvia Plath, Anne Sexton and Hunter S. Thompson.
It's never mentioned in obituaries or death notices, although it occurs on average once every three days in Santa Clara County.
In 2009, the last year for which complete statistics are available, 103 men and 42 women took their own lives here. Ages 45 to 64 had the highest rate, followed by ages 24 to 44. Only one person under the age of 14 died by suicide, but that jumped to nine in the age 15 to 19 group.
Suicide is a subject very few people are comfortable talking about, yet health care professionals say that is exactly what is needed if the numbers are to come down. It is something they believe needs to be talked about openly and freely.
"We had to practice talking about breast cancer. We had to practice talking about sexually transmitted diseases. If we can talk about Viagra, why can't we talk about suicide prevention?" asks Elena Tindall, suicide prevention coordinator for Santa Clara County.

"I would like survivors to know they will get through it and let the process of grief take place. They will come through to the other side of. Let other people help them through and they will make it through."
Coping skills for the bereaved
From Brad Leary and Jeannine Parsons, Hospice of the Valley and the Community Grief and Counseling Center.
• Reach out for help: See a qualified counselor or support group to help you process your feelings. You cannot do this alone.
• Express your feelings: You may feel sad, depressed, confused and angry. Anger is a feeling we try to hide from others because it doesn't show us in a positive light. Yet, you need to work through your feelings of anger, and there can be a sense of relief when doing so.
•Share memories of your loved one: Photos and videos can be helpful. Many bereaved clients fear forgetting their loved ones. By sharing memories you can ensure that they will live on. It is important to speak aloud the name of your loved one to others.
• Be gentle with yourself: If possible, reduce your hours at work. Surround yourself with those that comfort you. Steer clear of people who want to tell you what or how to feel.
• Set limits and learn to say no.
• Call on your personal faith.
• Write a letter to your loved one.
• Writing: journal, poetry, music.
• Remember the choice was not yours: No one is the sole influence on another's life.
• Try not to make sense of the suicide; you may never know "why." Ninety percent of people who complete suicide have a psychiatric disorder.
• Take one moment at a time.
• There is no universal time frame for healing, but you will move forward.
• Find meaning in your loss: This can be helpful after a significant period of time. You may choose to start a cause. One bereaved client started a bike ride for hope in honor of his daughter. Proceeds from the ride benefit counseling services in a local high school.
• You will never be the same again, but know you can survive. You may not think so, but you can.
read more here

The last part about finding meaning in your loss applies here. It made me want to work harder to save the lives of others.

This holiday, troops in Afghanistan thankful for surviving IED blast

This holiday, troops in Afghanistan thankful for surviving IED blast
By MARTIN KUZ
Stars and Stripes
Published: November 23, 2011
GOSHTA, Afghanistan — Pfc. Derick Vinton was looking forward to lunch as he drove an armored vehicle back to his platoon’s base last month near this village five miles from Pakistan.

That’s when the earth snarled and ripped open.

An 80-pound IED buried in the dirt road detonated beneath the truck’s passenger side. The front wheels heaved upward several feet before landing with a violent stomp. Dust swallowed the cab as the air inside went black.

Vinton, 19, of Riverton, Wyo., heard only silence on his radio headset. A long moment passed. Then yelling erupted. The other three men in the truck were alive.

The four soldiers climbed out of the crippled vehicle. One had suffered a concussion; two had minor leg injuries. Vinton was unhurt.
read more here

Troops Celebrate Thanksgiving in Iraq

Troops Celebrate Thanksgiving in Iraq

Published on Nov 20, 2011 by AssociatedPress
US soldiers at Camp Victory in Iraq celebrated the American holiday of Thanksgiving on Sunday. The traditional Thanksgiving lunch was served four days early because the camp was being closed in preparation for the troops' departure. (November 20)

Community steps up to open hearts, homes to 54 Marines on Thanksgiving

Community steps up to open hearts, homes to Marines on Thanksgiving
Submitted by Katie Harden on Fri, 11/18/2011

WILMINGTON, NC (WWAY) -- Fifty-four Marines from Camp Lejeune will have a home-cooked meal right here in Wilmington this Thanksgiving.

Steve Schnitzler, CEO of Port City Java, says Thanksgiving is the ultimate family holiday. He wants to give some North Carolina-based Marines a great Turkey Day experience.

With the help of 27 host families, a bus load of 54 Marines will make their way to the port Port City for a delicious meal.
read more here

Marines try to make the most of Thanksgiving in Afghanistan

Marines try to make the most of Thanksgiving in Afghanistan
By Geoff Ziezulewicz
Stars and Stripes
Published: November 25, 2010
ADRASKAN NATIONAL TRAINING CENTER, Afghanistan — If he were back home Thursday, Marine Lance Cpl. Chad Berry would have eaten turkey and ham at the home of one of his sets of grandparents in Tennessee. If it was his father’s side of the family, they’d go deer hunting after dinner, then come home and eat some more.
read more here
Marines try to make the most of Thanksgiving in Afghanistan

Marine wants to 'sell' his military leave to help homeless

Cpl. Matthew Purkey thought of others first, or he wouldn't have joined the Marines. Very few join any branch of the service thinking of themselves first. It's usually a case of caring about others, giving back, doing their part. What makes this story all the more telling about the type of people joining the military is what this man wanted to do instead of taking care of himself for Thanksgiving.

He wants to give back by taking care of homeless people.

No one would find any fault in him for wanting to spend Thanksgiving with his family or friends instead. While we walk by the homeless everyday, he thinks of them. While we decide they are not worth our time or find excuses to not care, he thinks of them.

Marine wants to 'sell' his military leave to help homeless

By Margo Rutlede Kissell, Staff Writer
5:47 PM Monday, August 24, 2009
Marine Cpl. Matthew Purkey wants to “sell” his 96 hours of military leave over Thanksgiving to raise $2,400 to benefit a homeless shelter.

The 27-year-old Waynesville native would like to spend those four days living among and helping the homeless in Wilmington, N.C., where he’s stationed at Camp Lejeune. Purkey is seeking $25 in donations per hour of leave to raise the money.

He came up with the idea to help Good Shepherd Center, a nonprofit that feeds the hungry and shelters the homeless, after hearing his Life Community Church minister gave a sermon asking the congregation if they’re doing enough to help those less fortunate.

“In the Marines, I’m taught to fight wars abroad,” said Purkey, whose 24th Marine Expeditionary Unit is expected to deploy in January, possibly to Afghanistan. “I realized wars need to be fought locally here, too.”
read more here
Marine wants to sell his military leave to help homeless

Thankful for General Carter Ham

I am thankful for all of the men and women serving this country and those who served coming forward to talk about PTSD. All these years later after the first studies were done, there are now so many that soon no one will ever wonder again what PTSD is. There are literally hundreds of their stories on this blog but the most magnificent thing about all of them is that they were willing to talk about it no matter how much others wanted to stigmatize them. Their courage is a testament of the human spirit.

When commanding officers are willing to say they have PTSD because of their service, it sets and example for all others to follow. Because of General Ham, his willingness to face this wound without any kind of shame will allow all others to come forward to seek the help they need to heal.

Thankful story two belongs to General Carter Ham. As you read his story think of all the others coming forward and know we all owe them a debt of gratitude.

PTSD:General's story highlights combat stress
Gen. Carter Ham, to call him a hero would be putting it mildly. He's a hero to the troops not just because he's a high ranking officer, but because he is willing to speak out on having PTSD. That is a kind of courage very few in his position are willing to do.When men like my husband came home from Vietnam, they knew something had changed inside of them but they didn't know what it was. They suffered in silence just as generations before them suffered. When PTSD was first used in 1976 with a study commissioned by the DAV, news was slowly reaching the veterans. While they fought to have it recognized as wound caused by their service, it was very difficult to talk about. The perception that there was something wrong with them kept too many from even seeking help to heal.

Today's blog posts devoted to giving thanks

For today there will be no posts on trauma or tragedy. I have the other 363 days of the year to do that because I don't plan on posting them on Christmas day either. I'm doing this because while it is so easy to find things to complain about, stories the media covers under the rule of "if it bleeds it leads" and tragedies around the world, it is often hard to find the hopeful stories. There are many I've found this year and I'll be re-posting them today.

I can't take credit for this idea. I was watching CNN and saw the promo for the Hero's night for broadcast tonight.

CNN HEROES
Tonight at 9 ET on CNN
Grammy winners Christina Aguilera, Alicia Keys and John Legend perform for CNN Heroes

I thought of how wonderful it was they picked tonight to do this honor for wonderful people. Pop back in often today and read some of the stories that were covered this year on this blog. Then try to remember when your feast is over as you lay down in bed tonight to give thanks for what is good in your life but also what is good in this world.

Senior Chaplain Kathie "Costos" DiCesare

International Fellowship of Chaplains
Namguardianangel@aol.com
http://www.namguardianangel.org/
http://www.woundedtimes.blogspot.com/
www.youtube.com/NamGuardianAngel
"The willingness with which our young people are likely to serve in any war, no matter how justified, shall be directly proportional to how they perceive veterans of early wars were treated and appreciated by our nation." - George Washington

Giving Thanks In Troubled Times

Growing up in a Greek/Scottish household, we were always surrounded by family. There were five members of my immediate family, aunts, uncles and cousins all gathered around for holidays. Thanksgiving was always huge for my family. It was a wonderful day with cherished memories no matter how the rest of the year was going. Nothing else mattered that day except to spend time together with the people that mattered the most.

Four years ago when I moved to Florida, there were two less members of my family. My father passed away in 1987. Ten years ago, one of my brothers passed away at the age of 42. Uncles and aunts were gone as well as another cousin, also passed away at a young age. My husband's family had all passed away in thirteen months between 1993 and 1994. The first Thanksgiving here in Florida was hard, but friends of ours came from back home. They have a winter place in St. Petersburg. Having them here made it better for us. They repeated it the following year. Last year, it was hard because it was just the three of us. It was very lonely and my mother had passed away that February. This year will be especially hard because my brother Nick passed away last month, less than a week after he was laid off from his job. I've been out of work since January when I was let go because my job as Administrator of Christian Education was eliminated. It's been a rough year financially especially considering it seems to be costing me more and more to be a Chaplain. Between training, membership and traveling, it's been more out of my pocket than in. But there has been a trade off that you cannot put a price tag on.

When my mother was getting on in years, she tended to focus on what was wrong instead of what was right. I used to remind her that she needs to see what is good instead of only looking at what is bad in her life. It helps me get through really hard times and a very, very stressful time covering trauma on this blog. I read so many horrible stories about suffering, accidents, families falling apart, people dying and especially the people suffering from trauma that it could very well send me into a deep dark depression of my own. While I tend to think that I've just gotten to the point when I can tolerate it all better, the truth is, it never really does get easier.

A strange thing happened this year above all the other years. My faith in human kindness is fully restored because of some of the wonderful stories I've read this year. People making a difference for others by sharing their own pain. People deciding that since they know how it feels, they want to make sure others find some comfort at the very least. People who decide to rise above their own pain to do whatever they can to help total strangers. I've met them as Chaplains, as outreach workers and as average people, all trying to make things better and asking nothing in return, expecting nothing more than the feeling they get when they help someone else.

I remember being infuriated that a post I did on a Marine on YouTube tossing a puppy off a cliff managed to get more hits than a story of a veteran committing suicide because he had PTSD. That made me think that the importance some people place on the shocking mattered more than sorrowful. That all changed with an 11 year old boy named Brenden Foster.

Brenden was dying when he made a wish the beginning of November. He could have asked for anything he wanted for himself. After all, who would turn down the dying wish of a child? While Brenden could have asked for anything as leukemia was taking days of his life away, Brenden saw some homeless people and made the wish that would change the world. He wanted to feed the homeless people.

I tracked the story of this earthly angel and felt blessed just to be able to share his story. The miracle came when the comments started to roll in. One by one, people were talking about how this child changed their minds and warmed their hearts. Today by 4:00 this post has pushed my daily hit count over 1,200. That's how important this child's story is. It has gained more comments than anything else I've posted since this blog began last year.

When we have troubles in our own lives, it's very easy to close our eyes to the needs of someone else. (I'm guilty of that as well. There are days when I don't even want to turn on the PC. ) This year, with all I have to think about that has not been very good, Brenden's example will cause me to do the blessing this year with a restored faith in God's bounty. There is so much for me to be grateful for. While our house needs a new roof we cannot afford to replace, we still have one when so many have lost their's. While my extended family is a lot smaller, the survivors are very close emotionally. While I don't have a paycheck anymore, I have a rewarding calling that is filling more than the big paychecks I used to get back in Massachusetts. While I could look at what I can no longer buy, I am looking at what money cannot buy and that is love. Love, prayers, compassion from total strangers coming into my life to help me, offering support and friendship. What I also have to be very grateful for this year is how many other people across the nation who have taken on helping our veterans with PTSD. This is a miracle as well. I've never had so much hope in my life that things will get better for them and their families.

If you have had a bad year, open your heart and then your eyes and you will find what you are truly blessed with. It's not that hard to do. You will find what really matters in your life instead of what you want out of life. Brenden did that and if an 11 year old child can do that facing death, so can you. Brenden first came into the media spotlight three weeks before he passed away and no one will ever be the same again.



Senior Chaplain Kathie "Costos" DiCesare
International Fellowship of Chaplains
Namguardianangel@aol.com
www.Namguardianangel.com
www.Woundedtimes.blogspot.com
www.youtube.com/NamGuardianAngel
"The willingness with which our young people are likely to serve in any war, no matter how justified, shall be directly proportional to how they perceive veterans of early wars were treated and appreciated by our nation." - George Washington