Wounded troops and families feted for holiday at Haley VA
By Robbyn Mitchell, Times Staff Writer
In Print: Friday, December 18, 2009
TAMPA
The din rose higher and higher as more than 300 guests talked and chowed down on turkey, but Craig Remsburg was determined to speak his piece Thursday night.
"I just want to thank you for all you're doing for us," Remsburg said as he shook the hand of Bob Silah, the chairman of Operation Helping Hand. "This is all so wonderful."
The father of an Army Ranger in a coma, Remsburg was in awe of how the Tampa community came out in force to honor his son and nearly 30 other injured or wounded military personnel at Operation Helping Hand's monthly dinner at the James A. Haley VA Medical Center's Spinal Cord Injury Center.
People were listening to Christmas music and talking between forkfuls of turkey , mashed potatoes, bread, yams and fried plantains.
Santa Claus sat smilingly near the front of the room, welcoming children. The Tampa Bay Lightning's Thunderbug flitted from table to table working the littlest dinner guests into a frenzy with mimicry and gags.
Silah said the group had raised $12,000 during the dinner, the bulk — $8,000 — coming from the Hillsborough County Sheriff's Office clay pigeon shoot out.
read more here
Wounded troops and families feted for holiday at Haley VA
Friday, December 18, 2009
Thursday, December 17, 2009
U.S. troops admit abusing prescription drugs
U.S. troops admit abusing prescription drugs
By Gregg Zoroya, USA TODAY
WASHINGTON — About one in four soldiers admit abusing prescription drugs, most of them pain relievers, in a one-year period, according to a Pentagon health survey released Wednesday.
The study, which surveyed more than 28,500 U.S. troops last year, showed that about 20% of Marines had also abused prescription drugs, mostly painkillers, in that same period.
The findings show the continued toll on the military from fighting wars in both Iraq and Afghanistan since 2003. Those wars have required troops to serve multiple combat deployments.
"We are aware that more prescription drugs are being used today for pain management and behavioral health issues," Brig. Gen. Colleen McGuire, director of the Army Suicide Prevention Task Force, said Wednesday. "These areas of substance abuse along with increased use of alcohol concern us."
read more here
http://www.usatoday.com/news/military/2009-12-16-milhealth_N.htm
By Gregg Zoroya, USA TODAY
WASHINGTON — About one in four soldiers admit abusing prescription drugs, most of them pain relievers, in a one-year period, according to a Pentagon health survey released Wednesday.
The study, which surveyed more than 28,500 U.S. troops last year, showed that about 20% of Marines had also abused prescription drugs, mostly painkillers, in that same period.
The findings show the continued toll on the military from fighting wars in both Iraq and Afghanistan since 2003. Those wars have required troops to serve multiple combat deployments.
"We are aware that more prescription drugs are being used today for pain management and behavioral health issues," Brig. Gen. Colleen McGuire, director of the Army Suicide Prevention Task Force, said Wednesday. "These areas of substance abuse along with increased use of alcohol concern us."
read more here
http://www.usatoday.com/news/military/2009-12-16-milhealth_N.htm
Military members are a step closer to a 3.4 percent pay raise
House approves 3.4 percent pay raise
By Karen Jowers - Staff writer
Posted : Wednesday Dec 16, 2009 17:25:38 EST
Military members are a step closer to a 3.4 percent pay raise, with House lawmakers’ passage of the 2010 defense spending bill Dec. 15.
House and Senate lawmakers agreed in conference to the 3.4 percent raise as part of the $636.3 billion Defense Appropriations bill. The Senate is expected to take up the bill later this week.
The raise is a half percentage point more than the administration requested, and was also included in the 2010 Defense Authorization Act.
read more here
http://www.armytimes.com/news/2009/12/military_appropriations_121609w/
By Karen Jowers - Staff writer
Posted : Wednesday Dec 16, 2009 17:25:38 EST
Military members are a step closer to a 3.4 percent pay raise, with House lawmakers’ passage of the 2010 defense spending bill Dec. 15.
House and Senate lawmakers agreed in conference to the 3.4 percent raise as part of the $636.3 billion Defense Appropriations bill. The Senate is expected to take up the bill later this week.
The raise is a half percentage point more than the administration requested, and was also included in the 2010 Defense Authorization Act.
read more here
http://www.armytimes.com/news/2009/12/military_appropriations_121609w/
Healing PTSD does not come exclusively from pills
One of the most troubling pieces of news not making the news is the fact most of the veterans going to the VA are not receiving therapy at all. Too many are simply seeing a psychiatrist, getting a wallet full of prescriptions to fill and sent away. When they complain they are not getting any better, they get their dosage increased or a another drug is added to the mix. Pills should be part of the healing to rewind the way their minds work but without therapy, pills do very little good.
What the military has gotten right is the Buddy Program, so that no one is alone, without someone watching over them and having someone to talk to. This however is not carried on after discharge when they return to their home states, more often than not, back to a family unable or unwilling to step in and help them heal.
Sporadic parts of the country are stepping up with programs to help provide the therapy these veterans need just as many new groups have formed on the Internet. The problem is there is no monitoring of the groups on the web and even less monitoring of the groups attempting to provide what the VA has not been doing. It would be a wonderful day if experts within the VA treating PTSD would step in and help these groups to make sure that the help is actually helping instead of harming. Good intentions are not enough when you are dealing with life and death.
If you have twenty volunteers helping, fully up to speed about PTSD and doing great work, that can all be undone by one hack giving the wrong information or taking the wrong approach. Since most of the work being done is done in private, how can anyone know what is being said behind closed doors? Do these groups have someone checking on what is being provided?
We make a huge mistake when we assume people are experts on what they are supposed to be dealing with, but the truth is, psychiatrists and psychologists may not be experts on PTSD even though they are treating it. Many chaplains report they know very little about PTSD but are supposed to be able to provide spiritual care/council to soldiers with it. Most of the misdiagnosis being reporter are not done for any other reason than the providers are not experts on PTSD because no matter what they may suspect, if they look for it, they will find it in PTSD.
Bipolar, paranoid, schizophrenia, personality disorders, alcoholism, drug addiction, you name it, the symptoms can all be found in PTSD. The provider won't know for sure unless they are looking for the key words "suddenly changed" and then back that up to looking for a traumatic event. PTSD comes only after trauma. A person does not change drastically for no reason at all. Instead of the providers looking for the source of the changes in the first place, they hunt around for the usual suspects. Medications even for the wrong illness can mask what is at the root of the illness, or in the case of PTSD, the wounding.
Most veterans view events with tunnel vision, unable to take in the whole picture of what brought on the event eating away at them. They cannot change their focus because the pull is too strong and no one is helping them to see beyond the event. If they are allowed to continue to feel "evil" holding onto the pain, the pain gets stronger and they get weaker. Medication is increased in response instead of talking them thru it.
Can there be any more telling evidence of this than this article? They are trying to fill in the gaps anyway they can. They want to heal, not be just medicated into numbness. They want to feel good things again. They can't get there from here unless they receive the help they really need instead of just what is the easiest to provide.
What the military has gotten right is the Buddy Program, so that no one is alone, without someone watching over them and having someone to talk to. This however is not carried on after discharge when they return to their home states, more often than not, back to a family unable or unwilling to step in and help them heal.
Sporadic parts of the country are stepping up with programs to help provide the therapy these veterans need just as many new groups have formed on the Internet. The problem is there is no monitoring of the groups on the web and even less monitoring of the groups attempting to provide what the VA has not been doing. It would be a wonderful day if experts within the VA treating PTSD would step in and help these groups to make sure that the help is actually helping instead of harming. Good intentions are not enough when you are dealing with life and death.
If you have twenty volunteers helping, fully up to speed about PTSD and doing great work, that can all be undone by one hack giving the wrong information or taking the wrong approach. Since most of the work being done is done in private, how can anyone know what is being said behind closed doors? Do these groups have someone checking on what is being provided?
We make a huge mistake when we assume people are experts on what they are supposed to be dealing with, but the truth is, psychiatrists and psychologists may not be experts on PTSD even though they are treating it. Many chaplains report they know very little about PTSD but are supposed to be able to provide spiritual care/council to soldiers with it. Most of the misdiagnosis being reporter are not done for any other reason than the providers are not experts on PTSD because no matter what they may suspect, if they look for it, they will find it in PTSD.
Bipolar, paranoid, schizophrenia, personality disorders, alcoholism, drug addiction, you name it, the symptoms can all be found in PTSD. The provider won't know for sure unless they are looking for the key words "suddenly changed" and then back that up to looking for a traumatic event. PTSD comes only after trauma. A person does not change drastically for no reason at all. Instead of the providers looking for the source of the changes in the first place, they hunt around for the usual suspects. Medications even for the wrong illness can mask what is at the root of the illness, or in the case of PTSD, the wounding.
Most veterans view events with tunnel vision, unable to take in the whole picture of what brought on the event eating away at them. They cannot change their focus because the pull is too strong and no one is helping them to see beyond the event. If they are allowed to continue to feel "evil" holding onto the pain, the pain gets stronger and they get weaker. Medication is increased in response instead of talking them thru it.
Can there be any more telling evidence of this than this article? They are trying to fill in the gaps anyway they can. They want to heal, not be just medicated into numbness. They want to feel good things again. They can't get there from here unless they receive the help they really need instead of just what is the easiest to provide.
Soldiers find comfort at tattoo shops, churches and other refuges
Service members at Fort Hood battered by war and last month's shootings.
By Jeremy Schwartz
AMERICAN-STATESMAN STAFF
Sunday, December 13, 2009
KILLEEN — In the ink embedded in his arms, Army Sgt. Ryan Witko carries the scars of war. The Cincinnati native did two tours in Iraq, providing security for ambulances in Baghdad. He's cleaned out body parts and blood from damaged Humvees. He's watched fellow soldiers arrive at the hospital he worked at in the Green Zone shattered and stunned by attacks. And in 2007, Witko was in a Humvee that was blown apart by a roadside bomb.
The 27-year-old now walks with the assistance of a curved black cane and gets through the day thanks to a cocktail of medications prescribed for his degenerative disc disease, post-traumatic stress disorder, bipolar disorder and sleeplessness. He says he's "floating around" Fort Hood until his scheduled medical discharge next month.
For Witko, comfort and solace now come from an unlikely place: La Rude's Tattoo Studio, on a gritty avenue filled with pawn shops and convenience stores in downtown Killeen. On his right arm, Witko has the words "Only God Can Judge Me," a phrase, he says, meant to "cleanse me of the guilt of the things that I had to do while in Iraq."
"When I can't find relief anywhere else, I come here and get a tattoo," he said on a recent evening. "There are three or four guys here on a regular basis who are going through the same thing, and this is like a meeting spot."
With Fort Hood soldiers routinely serving multiple tours in two wars and still reeling from the Nov. 5 shootings that left 13 dead and dozens injured at the post, their mental health is being taxed in unprecedented ways. Since the shooting, Army officials have increased services available to soldiers, but some are still reluctant to talk to a therapist. For soldiers like Witko, help comes from a phalanx of informal counselors — tattoo artists, coffee shop owners and clergy members.
read more hereSoldiers find comfort
Milblogs Go Silent Across the Internet
Milblogs Go Silent Across the Internet
Submitted by kpaul.mallasch
CYBERSPACE - On Wednesday, December 16 2009, many military blogs (milblogs) have decided to go silent for the day, while others are choosing to go silent for a longer period of time. This is happening because milblogs are facing an increasingly hostile environment from within the military.
According to Mr. Wolf of Blackfive.net, "While senior leadership has embraced blogging and social media, many field grade officers and senior NCOs do not embrace the concept. From general apathy in not wanting to deal with the issue to outright hositility to it, many commands are not only failing to support such activities, but are aggressively acting against active duty milbloggers, milspouses, and others. The number of such incidents appears to be growing, with milbloggers receiving reprimands, verbal and written, not only for their activities but those of spouses and supporters."
read more here
http://www.munciefreepress.com/node/21612
Wednesday, December 16, 2009
Two-legged dog gives hope to disabled Army vets
Two-legged dog gives hope to disabled Army vets
By SUE MANNING Associated Press
For several years, Jude Stringfellow and her Lab-chow mix have toured the country with a simple message: Faith walks.
Born without front legs to a junkyard dog around Christmas 2002, Faith the puppy was rejected and abused by her mother. She was rescued by Reuben Stringfellow, now an Army E-4 specialist, who had been asked to bury other puppies in the litter.
"Can we fix her? Stringfellow, then 17, asked his mom. "No, but maybe we can help her," she said.
read more here
http://www.komonews.com/news/local/79445672.html
Band of sisters: PTSD
Band of sisters: PTSD
Posted: 04:40 PM ET
By Lindy Hall
Senior Producer
Women are joining the military in record numbers. Of the 1.8 million troops that have been deployed in the Iraq–Afghanistan conflict, 200 thousand of them are women. 120 of them have died, over 600 have been wounded. But hundreds more have come home with wounds that are harder to see. Post Traumatic Stress Disorder, or PTSD, “is best thought of as a disorder of recovery,” says Dr. Natara Garovoy who runs the Women’s Mental Health Clinic at the Veteran’s Administration in Palo Alto, California, and women are twice as likely as men to suffer from it. She says that when “someone experiences something traumatic, basically life threatening in some way” that event can really stay with them and make sleeping, socializing and working difficult. “Lives are lost, relationships are damaged-people have a hard time working…they drop out of school and they start to isolate…the very life they were hoping to lead kind of disappears,” she adds.
Women are facing a lot of “unique stressors”. Often they are the only women in their unit, many of them are mothers and many of those are single mothers. “As primary caregivers…being deployed and still having that responsibility” is unique to them, Garovoy says.
read more here
Band of sisters PTSDlinked from ICasualties.org
Posted: 04:40 PM ET
By Lindy Hall
Senior Producer
Women are joining the military in record numbers. Of the 1.8 million troops that have been deployed in the Iraq–Afghanistan conflict, 200 thousand of them are women. 120 of them have died, over 600 have been wounded. But hundreds more have come home with wounds that are harder to see. Post Traumatic Stress Disorder, or PTSD, “is best thought of as a disorder of recovery,” says Dr. Natara Garovoy who runs the Women’s Mental Health Clinic at the Veteran’s Administration in Palo Alto, California, and women are twice as likely as men to suffer from it. She says that when “someone experiences something traumatic, basically life threatening in some way” that event can really stay with them and make sleeping, socializing and working difficult. “Lives are lost, relationships are damaged-people have a hard time working…they drop out of school and they start to isolate…the very life they were hoping to lead kind of disappears,” she adds.
Women are facing a lot of “unique stressors”. Often they are the only women in their unit, many of them are mothers and many of those are single mothers. “As primary caregivers…being deployed and still having that responsibility” is unique to them, Garovoy says.
She also adds that “One traumatic event is enough…but the more trauma exposures you have, the more likely you are to suffer from PTSD.” And even though women aren’t technically in combat roles because they aren’t actually on the “front lines”, women are putting their lives on the line every day, but it is frustrating and stressful to many women who don’t feel they are recognized for their contributions. Corporal Shiloh Morrison is 24 years old and is a reservist in the U.S. Marine Corps. She says she is frustrated when people infer that, just because you’re a woman, you wouldn’t have been in combat.
read more here
Band of sisters PTSDlinked from ICasualties.org
An army of volunteers helps build home for disabled soldier's family
Now this kind of thing is what really shows them they are supported more than anything else a community can do!
An army of volunteers helps build home for disabled soldier's family
By JIM McCONVILLE • STAFF WRITER • December 14, 2009
UNION BEACH — Soon, Army Staff Sgt. Michael Minard finally will have his own bed to sleep in.
Minard, his wife, Lynda, and their two children will take ownership of their new house next week. The one-story, 2,400-square-foot ranch was built by Homes For Our Troops, with the help of countless volunteers around the state.
The four-bedroom house, now in the final touch-up stage for its grand opening, is a roughly four-month labor of love that began Aug. 18.
For Minard, it's been a long and painful two-year journey since he was injured in Iraq.
Minard was on his third tour in Iraq in October 2007 when his legs were severely injured by an improvised explosive device detonated in the Sadr City section of Baghdad by the Stryker armored vehicle he was riding in.
Minard eventually was transported to Walter Reed Army Medical Center in Washington, D.C. He awoke in the hospital to find that his legs had been amputated above the knee as a result of the explosion.
Now nearly two years later, Minard finds himself perpetually stunned by the kindness of volunteers, many of them strangers, who have donated their time or money to help build his house, which is completely handicapped accessible, inside and out.
read more here
An army of volunteers helps build home for disabled soldier
Fort Bragg Special Forces soldiers to receive Silver Stars
Special Forces soldiers to receive Silver Stars
The Associated Press
Posted : Wednesday Dec 16, 2009 13:26:22 EST
FORT BRAGG, N.C. — Two Special Forces soldiers based in North Carolina will be awarded for repeatedly risking their lives to help their unit mates during battles in Afghanistan.
Master Sgt. Anthony Siriwardene and Staff Sgt. Lindsey W. Clarke will be awarded the Silver Star on Wednesday.
Clarke exposed himself to enemy fire to save his teammates during an ambush in 2009. Siriwardene flanked enemy machine guns repeatedly during a 56-hour gunfight in 2005.
Special Forces soldiers to receive Silver Stars
The Associated Press
Posted : Wednesday Dec 16, 2009 13:26:22 EST
FORT BRAGG, N.C. — Two Special Forces soldiers based in North Carolina will be awarded for repeatedly risking their lives to help their unit mates during battles in Afghanistan.
Master Sgt. Anthony Siriwardene and Staff Sgt. Lindsey W. Clarke will be awarded the Silver Star on Wednesday.
Clarke exposed himself to enemy fire to save his teammates during an ambush in 2009. Siriwardene flanked enemy machine guns repeatedly during a 56-hour gunfight in 2005.
Special Forces soldiers to receive Silver Stars
Grinch Steals Gifts From War Veteran
Grinch Steals Gifts From War Veteran
Army Sgt. David Frappier Just Back From Afghanistan When Burglar Takes Everything
Elizabeth Erwin
Reporter, KPHO.com
PHOENIX -- An Army veteran just back from overseas fell victim to a crime that left him scratching his head and his family scrambling for Christmas presents.
Sgt. 1st Class David Frappier was on leave from his third deployment to Afghanistan. The Army man decided to surprise his kids at a church function at the Thomas Road Baptist Church in Phoenix. He parked the family van under a well-lit carport, knowing what was inside was valuable.
read more here
http://www.kpho.com/news/21966660/detail.html
Army Sgt. David Frappier Just Back From Afghanistan When Burglar Takes Everything
Elizabeth Erwin
Reporter, KPHO.com
PHOENIX -- An Army veteran just back from overseas fell victim to a crime that left him scratching his head and his family scrambling for Christmas presents.
Sgt. 1st Class David Frappier was on leave from his third deployment to Afghanistan. The Army man decided to surprise his kids at a church function at the Thomas Road Baptist Church in Phoenix. He parked the family van under a well-lit carport, knowing what was inside was valuable.
read more here
http://www.kpho.com/news/21966660/detail.html
Jacksonville Home Donated to Disabled Veteran's Family
Jacksonville Home Donated to Disabled Veteran's Family
Roger Weeder Ann Butler
JACKSONVILLE, Fla. -- A local family found out what it means to live in a city that prides itself on being military-friendly.
The Shield Foundation Home for Veterans program selected Jacksonville and a Jacksonville family to receive a home.
Louis and Loyda Hamilton and their five children got the keys to their home on Myrtle Avenue during a presentation at City Hall.
The Shield Foundation is associated with Pinnacle Property Solutions, which specializes in the sale of foreclosed property. The home being donated is in foreclosure and was renovated for the Hamilton family.
read more here
Jacksonville Home Donated to Disabled Veteran
Roger Weeder Ann Butler
JACKSONVILLE, Fla. -- A local family found out what it means to live in a city that prides itself on being military-friendly.
The Shield Foundation Home for Veterans program selected Jacksonville and a Jacksonville family to receive a home.
Louis and Loyda Hamilton and their five children got the keys to their home on Myrtle Avenue during a presentation at City Hall.
The Shield Foundation is associated with Pinnacle Property Solutions, which specializes in the sale of foreclosed property. The home being donated is in foreclosure and was renovated for the Hamilton family.
read more here
Jacksonville Home Donated to Disabled Veteran
Heaven Knows They Need You
When someone in your family returns from war, what do you expect? Do you expect them to come home the same way they were when they left? Do you think to yourself, they are home and they are safe so there is no need to worry about them anymore?
Too many times what happens is they come home, cover the scars they carry easily while they are treated to their favorite meals, welcome home parties and spending time with the people in their lives they care about the most. Young soldiers want to hang out with their buddies. Servicemen/women want to spend time with their kids and spouses. They want to get back into the "normal" world they always knew. The problem is, for some, that normal world is feeling as foreign as the world they just left.
Sometimes it just takes time to recover but other times, time is not their friend. You may notice days, weeks or months after their return, they are doing things, saying things totally out of character for them. You may notice they seem to zone out while you are talking to them, they drink more, talk less and suffer from nightmares. Somehow we manage to forget where they were and what their lives were like away from us. So we make excuses.
Parents, after knowing them all their lives, being there since their first step, will look at their veteran son/daughter, and wonder why they are acting the way they are. They will see the changes and get angry, feeling frustrated, Jack and Jill came back from the "hill" with buckets filled with woes. They want them back the way they were but as they wait, as they get into arguments, if they are dealing with a PTSD veteran, that kind of response only adds to the problem.
A spouse has the same issue going on. They want them back the way they were. They wish, hope, wait, wonder what magic words to use to get their husband or wife to return to the way they were before. Time is now the enemy. Frustration builds. If the issue is PTSD, it is also time lost when they could be healing, waiting allows PTSD to gain more control over them.
If they come home with drastic changes in their personality, you will be the first to notice, but if you don't understand what PTSD is, you don't know what you're looking at.
You need to understand what they dealing with. The sooner they get help, the better. If you love them, if you don't want them to leave then help them heal. With any other illness, you'd make sure they go to the doctors for help. This is not just an illness, it is a wound. It is a wound to their soul and can claim every part of them. Fight for them. If you watch the following video and suspect they have PTSD, then get them to go for help. If you are wrong, you have one less thing to worry about but if you are right, you may have just saved their life. Understand that changes after trauma are something to worry about. Be their advocate as you have been with everything else in their life.
PTSD is a wound. They may wish to be the way they were before. You may wish they were the way they were before. All of what they were is still there behind a wall of pain searching for a way to come out from behind it. Help break that wall down so they can get out. Stop wanting and start doing. Learn what PTSD. Heaven knows they need you now!
Too many times what happens is they come home, cover the scars they carry easily while they are treated to their favorite meals, welcome home parties and spending time with the people in their lives they care about the most. Young soldiers want to hang out with their buddies. Servicemen/women want to spend time with their kids and spouses. They want to get back into the "normal" world they always knew. The problem is, for some, that normal world is feeling as foreign as the world they just left.
Sometimes it just takes time to recover but other times, time is not their friend. You may notice days, weeks or months after their return, they are doing things, saying things totally out of character for them. You may notice they seem to zone out while you are talking to them, they drink more, talk less and suffer from nightmares. Somehow we manage to forget where they were and what their lives were like away from us. So we make excuses.
Parents, after knowing them all their lives, being there since their first step, will look at their veteran son/daughter, and wonder why they are acting the way they are. They will see the changes and get angry, feeling frustrated, Jack and Jill came back from the "hill" with buckets filled with woes. They want them back the way they were but as they wait, as they get into arguments, if they are dealing with a PTSD veteran, that kind of response only adds to the problem.
A spouse has the same issue going on. They want them back the way they were. They wish, hope, wait, wonder what magic words to use to get their husband or wife to return to the way they were before. Time is now the enemy. Frustration builds. If the issue is PTSD, it is also time lost when they could be healing, waiting allows PTSD to gain more control over them.
If they come home with drastic changes in their personality, you will be the first to notice, but if you don't understand what PTSD is, you don't know what you're looking at.
Posted to Great Americans by NamGuardianAngel on December 14, 2009
You need to understand what they dealing with. The sooner they get help, the better. If you love them, if you don't want them to leave then help them heal. With any other illness, you'd make sure they go to the doctors for help. This is not just an illness, it is a wound. It is a wound to their soul and can claim every part of them. Fight for them. If you watch the following video and suspect they have PTSD, then get them to go for help. If you are wrong, you have one less thing to worry about but if you are right, you may have just saved their life. Understand that changes after trauma are something to worry about. Be their advocate as you have been with everything else in their life.
Posted to Great Americans by NamGuardianAngel on September 11, 2009
PTSD is a wound. They may wish to be the way they were before. You may wish they were the way they were before. All of what they were is still there behind a wall of pain searching for a way to come out from behind it. Help break that wall down so they can get out. Stop wanting and start doing. Learn what PTSD. Heaven knows they need you now!
Tuesday, December 15, 2009
Why I give back to veterans
The reason I do what I do has been attacked recently so I thought it was a good time to clarify why I do what I do. I've been there. I know what it's like for the families to feel lost and alone, struggling to make sense out of what is happening in their lives, but above all, what it is like to watch someone you love suffer.
When Vietnam veterans came home, no one was talking about PTSD. There were no news reports other than when they were arrested and the headline made sure to include the words "Vietnam Veteran" supporting the image of "yet another crazy Nam Vet" jeopardizing polite society. VV wives knew better and we learned by living. Each day was a challenge to hang onto hope when each day we watched them die a little bit more inside. Everyday we never knew if it would be a good day when we saw more of the husband we loved smile again, or if it would be a day of having to get out of the house with our kids because Dad was having a bad day.
We learned that when the nightmares came, they were not really there in the bed, if they slept in the bed at all instead of on the sofa. We learned you do not yell to wake them up or touch them in striking distance because we could end up with a black eye or bloody nose. We learned sudden moves, like walking up behind them too quietly could cause yet another bad reaction from them. A broken glass, a kid crying because they got hurt playing, all could cause an over reaction from them, adding to the event, and our reaction could either ease it or make it worse. We also learned how to help our kids understand it was not their fault.
We learned how to go shopping alone; parent virtually alone; make decisions; go to movies with friends instead of our husbands; adjust to the fact when we did manage to get them to go to a restaurant, we would have to wait until there was a booth open instead of sitting at a perfectly good table in the center of the room. We also learned how to deal with our own families refusing to understand what we were trying to tell them because they were too busy talking, telling us to get divorced because "you don't deserve to live this way" never once able to understand our husband didn't deserve to live "this" way either.
We learned how to deal with the financial problems because they were spending money we didn't have so they could self-medicate. We dealt with the fact it was easier for them to be considered a drunk or druggie instead of crazy. Yes, crazy. Most of them said they didn't want to go for help because the VA would end up locking them up and tossing away the key if they knew what was going on inside of their minds because they managed somehow to decide they had turned evil. We dealt with the bad decisions they made on a whim buying a motorcycle when the car was falling apart, buying lobsters when the kids needed new shoes, the stack of bills that couldn't be paid because they couldn't hold onto a job very long and refused to go to the VA.
Even when we could get them to finally understand they needed help and we needed hope given back, the VA was "out to get them" in their own minds and it was a daily struggle to get them to keep trying. Each denial letter came in the mail and we watched the knife dig deeper into their backs as we also saw shreds of hope evaporate before our eyes. We held it all together, and then someone managed to take on the VA, fighting with doctors that wouldn't talk to us or include us in on the way they treated our husbands. We knew when they were not telling the doctors the truth about what was going on because they tried to hide it instead of being honest, again, with the fear hanging over their heads that they would be locked up, and we'd be able to help the doctors discover the truth. Why? Because we knew the sooner the doctors knew exactly what was going on, the sooner we'd be able to get our husband's back in our lives again. At least we hoped that would be the case.
Some of us just couldn't do it anymore and some of us reached the point where the world crashed so hard on our shoulders, we just kept giving up until the day came when they were having a good day again and we'd remember we loved them. My husband and I separated several times, but we never stopped talking to each other. I had the luxury of understanding why he was the way he was and even with that, there were times when it was just too much, too long for me to stay strong.
In all the years I managed somehow to get other veterans to listen to me more than my own husband did. I knew what it was like to be inside their head and for most, they hated the fact I could get in there. Stunned was replaced by hope because some got what they were trying to hide and why they tried to hide it. I still had to hold down a job, so I did accounting, worked as assistant manager of an ice cream shop at night so I could be home with our daughter during the day and did whatever I could to help make ends meet. I also had to hang onto some hope.
First it was a battle to get him to go for help. Then the diagnosis. Then to the Vet's Center. Then to the VA. Then to the DAV because his claim was turned down at the same time experts were telling us he needed the VA experts so that he could begin to heal. Then it was a six year battle to have his claim approved and each denial dug the knife deeper into his soul. They were billing us for his treatment. The insurance we had because he managed to keep his job wouldn't pay, because they said it was the responsibility of the government. The PTSD was linked to Vietnam by VA doctors leaving the private insurance off the hook but the VA wouldn't honor his claim. The media didn't give a crap and told me reporting the story on what was happening to our veterans was just "sour grapes" instead of opening their ears and hearing what was happening, not just to my husband, but to veterans all over the country. The net was filled with veterans screaming for help but the reporters were oblivious to all of them.
With an approved claim finally, we had a check for some of the years we had to fight. By then I was an expert on PTSD. I read more clinical books than a PHD, talked to more veterans and their families than any therapist but above all, I lived with it everyday. At this point I could have said, "I got mine, screw you" and just got on with my life but I was compelled to help others get to where I was. My own husband said he wished I could just be "normal" and drop all of this. I had to keep reminding him what it was like when no one would help us.
So here I am 27 years later, doing blog posts so that veterans and their families can read about others across the country, PTSD can stay with a huge spotlight on it and no one will suffer feeling alone. I also do it so that the next time some reporter figures out there is a huge secret going on with our veterans suffering, they have most reports all in one place. I do it so that wives like me won't have to do this alone without someone understanding and helping them avoid the same mistakes I made. So that parents and partners of the newer veterans can get to where I am on the fast track. Above all, so that they do not have to watch them die a slow death.
None of what we're seeing has to happen. I used the technology of today and came up with videos because people want to be entertained. I figured if they were ever going to stop being afraid of the words Post Traumatic Stress Disorder, they would have to hear it from someone on their level and someone who made it work. It's why I wrote the book I did but it's a lot easier to get thru a video than over a hundred pages of a book.
Yes, I could have walked away, gave up this extra stress and thought about just me and my family but I couldn't. God wouldn't let me. Every time I wanted to walk away, He pulled me back in by an email begging for help or yet another email telling me I made a difference and then my heart would be broken all over again when an email came from someone finding me too late to save the life of someone they knew, too late to keep a family together, too late to provide a means to forgive.
So I sit here today, ignored by the media unless they want an easy way to find a story to do on a veteran or find easy facts. Ignored by the people with the power to really do something to help the veterans heal and forgotten about when I need help from other organizations using my work. In all of this I also had to figure out how the hell to begin a tax exempt so that I could finally get some donations to cover the huge expense of becoming a chaplain and carrying insurance, plus the training and the travel. I used to pay for the expense of traveling around the country, but when I said I needed trips funded, well, then I wasn't worth it.
We're suffering financially for what I do. No one seems to really care. Each day, I wonder how to pay the bills, suffer with the usual problems every family does and then wonder why I still do it when no matter what I do, people will refuse to help me. One high ranking person actually said that if I were any good at what I did, I wouldn't need to ask for help. Imagine that! He never stopped to consider he never offered to help me either. Then again, he doesn't believe there is such a huge problem with PTSD. The fact is, the veterans I help can't afford to help me. I won't publicize what I do for them or what they say to me because it's a promise I made to them a long time ago. I only post about what is available online from the media. From time to time I tell my own story and put in my two cents coming from tracking all of this and talking to the veterans for all these years, plus living with it.
I offered to help more organizations than I can remember when they first started but when I asked them to help me help veterans more, I was ignored. I sent out videos but never heard back even though I had a huge file from veterans telling me they needed them and they helped their families understand what they were trying to tell them.
Knowing what works in this world doesn't seem to matter unless you have someone helping. Someone to support you and help you do what you know how to do because they know what you don't. I know PTSD. I don't know how to do everything else that they know but they won't share. What goes around comes around and just as I share what I've learned about PTSD to make life easier, they won't share to make my life easier even though I've been proven right sooner or later. I knew PTSD would explode in 2001 and spent my own money to get my book published in 2002. Did this matter? No.
Congress didn't listen, the media didn't listen, service groups didn't listen and now, they are still not listening while I feel like John the Baptist screaming in the wilderness getting my neck ready for the chopping block. If I don't get some financial help soon, I will have to stop because I won't be able to afford the Internet or the roof over my head. I've been out of work for almost two years, in other words, without a paycheck, but working for free doing this work. If you can't afford to donate, believe me, I understand. Most of the charities I used to donate to haven't received donations from me this year either. What you can do is offer a prayer for me and my work. You can pass on my work to others on your email list and spread the word. The more hits I get, the less I am ignored.
There has to be someone out there somewhere able and willing to help me but I have yet to find them. I've been blessed with a few that have reached out to help as much as they can, but "the harvest is plenty and the workers are few" leaving me out here pretty much alone.
If you trust me, believe in an "average person" like you trying to make a difference, then please help me so that I can keep helping them heal.
When Vietnam veterans came home, no one was talking about PTSD. There were no news reports other than when they were arrested and the headline made sure to include the words "Vietnam Veteran" supporting the image of "yet another crazy Nam Vet" jeopardizing polite society. VV wives knew better and we learned by living. Each day was a challenge to hang onto hope when each day we watched them die a little bit more inside. Everyday we never knew if it would be a good day when we saw more of the husband we loved smile again, or if it would be a day of having to get out of the house with our kids because Dad was having a bad day.
We learned that when the nightmares came, they were not really there in the bed, if they slept in the bed at all instead of on the sofa. We learned you do not yell to wake them up or touch them in striking distance because we could end up with a black eye or bloody nose. We learned sudden moves, like walking up behind them too quietly could cause yet another bad reaction from them. A broken glass, a kid crying because they got hurt playing, all could cause an over reaction from them, adding to the event, and our reaction could either ease it or make it worse. We also learned how to help our kids understand it was not their fault.
We learned how to go shopping alone; parent virtually alone; make decisions; go to movies with friends instead of our husbands; adjust to the fact when we did manage to get them to go to a restaurant, we would have to wait until there was a booth open instead of sitting at a perfectly good table in the center of the room. We also learned how to deal with our own families refusing to understand what we were trying to tell them because they were too busy talking, telling us to get divorced because "you don't deserve to live this way" never once able to understand our husband didn't deserve to live "this" way either.
We learned how to deal with the financial problems because they were spending money we didn't have so they could self-medicate. We dealt with the fact it was easier for them to be considered a drunk or druggie instead of crazy. Yes, crazy. Most of them said they didn't want to go for help because the VA would end up locking them up and tossing away the key if they knew what was going on inside of their minds because they managed somehow to decide they had turned evil. We dealt with the bad decisions they made on a whim buying a motorcycle when the car was falling apart, buying lobsters when the kids needed new shoes, the stack of bills that couldn't be paid because they couldn't hold onto a job very long and refused to go to the VA.
Even when we could get them to finally understand they needed help and we needed hope given back, the VA was "out to get them" in their own minds and it was a daily struggle to get them to keep trying. Each denial letter came in the mail and we watched the knife dig deeper into their backs as we also saw shreds of hope evaporate before our eyes. We held it all together, and then someone managed to take on the VA, fighting with doctors that wouldn't talk to us or include us in on the way they treated our husbands. We knew when they were not telling the doctors the truth about what was going on because they tried to hide it instead of being honest, again, with the fear hanging over their heads that they would be locked up, and we'd be able to help the doctors discover the truth. Why? Because we knew the sooner the doctors knew exactly what was going on, the sooner we'd be able to get our husband's back in our lives again. At least we hoped that would be the case.
Some of us just couldn't do it anymore and some of us reached the point where the world crashed so hard on our shoulders, we just kept giving up until the day came when they were having a good day again and we'd remember we loved them. My husband and I separated several times, but we never stopped talking to each other. I had the luxury of understanding why he was the way he was and even with that, there were times when it was just too much, too long for me to stay strong.
In all the years I managed somehow to get other veterans to listen to me more than my own husband did. I knew what it was like to be inside their head and for most, they hated the fact I could get in there. Stunned was replaced by hope because some got what they were trying to hide and why they tried to hide it. I still had to hold down a job, so I did accounting, worked as assistant manager of an ice cream shop at night so I could be home with our daughter during the day and did whatever I could to help make ends meet. I also had to hang onto some hope.
First it was a battle to get him to go for help. Then the diagnosis. Then to the Vet's Center. Then to the VA. Then to the DAV because his claim was turned down at the same time experts were telling us he needed the VA experts so that he could begin to heal. Then it was a six year battle to have his claim approved and each denial dug the knife deeper into his soul. They were billing us for his treatment. The insurance we had because he managed to keep his job wouldn't pay, because they said it was the responsibility of the government. The PTSD was linked to Vietnam by VA doctors leaving the private insurance off the hook but the VA wouldn't honor his claim. The media didn't give a crap and told me reporting the story on what was happening to our veterans was just "sour grapes" instead of opening their ears and hearing what was happening, not just to my husband, but to veterans all over the country. The net was filled with veterans screaming for help but the reporters were oblivious to all of them.
With an approved claim finally, we had a check for some of the years we had to fight. By then I was an expert on PTSD. I read more clinical books than a PHD, talked to more veterans and their families than any therapist but above all, I lived with it everyday. At this point I could have said, "I got mine, screw you" and just got on with my life but I was compelled to help others get to where I was. My own husband said he wished I could just be "normal" and drop all of this. I had to keep reminding him what it was like when no one would help us.
So here I am 27 years later, doing blog posts so that veterans and their families can read about others across the country, PTSD can stay with a huge spotlight on it and no one will suffer feeling alone. I also do it so that the next time some reporter figures out there is a huge secret going on with our veterans suffering, they have most reports all in one place. I do it so that wives like me won't have to do this alone without someone understanding and helping them avoid the same mistakes I made. So that parents and partners of the newer veterans can get to where I am on the fast track. Above all, so that they do not have to watch them die a slow death.
None of what we're seeing has to happen. I used the technology of today and came up with videos because people want to be entertained. I figured if they were ever going to stop being afraid of the words Post Traumatic Stress Disorder, they would have to hear it from someone on their level and someone who made it work. It's why I wrote the book I did but it's a lot easier to get thru a video than over a hundred pages of a book.
Yes, I could have walked away, gave up this extra stress and thought about just me and my family but I couldn't. God wouldn't let me. Every time I wanted to walk away, He pulled me back in by an email begging for help or yet another email telling me I made a difference and then my heart would be broken all over again when an email came from someone finding me too late to save the life of someone they knew, too late to keep a family together, too late to provide a means to forgive.
So I sit here today, ignored by the media unless they want an easy way to find a story to do on a veteran or find easy facts. Ignored by the people with the power to really do something to help the veterans heal and forgotten about when I need help from other organizations using my work. In all of this I also had to figure out how the hell to begin a tax exempt so that I could finally get some donations to cover the huge expense of becoming a chaplain and carrying insurance, plus the training and the travel. I used to pay for the expense of traveling around the country, but when I said I needed trips funded, well, then I wasn't worth it.
We're suffering financially for what I do. No one seems to really care. Each day, I wonder how to pay the bills, suffer with the usual problems every family does and then wonder why I still do it when no matter what I do, people will refuse to help me. One high ranking person actually said that if I were any good at what I did, I wouldn't need to ask for help. Imagine that! He never stopped to consider he never offered to help me either. Then again, he doesn't believe there is such a huge problem with PTSD. The fact is, the veterans I help can't afford to help me. I won't publicize what I do for them or what they say to me because it's a promise I made to them a long time ago. I only post about what is available online from the media. From time to time I tell my own story and put in my two cents coming from tracking all of this and talking to the veterans for all these years, plus living with it.
I offered to help more organizations than I can remember when they first started but when I asked them to help me help veterans more, I was ignored. I sent out videos but never heard back even though I had a huge file from veterans telling me they needed them and they helped their families understand what they were trying to tell them.
Knowing what works in this world doesn't seem to matter unless you have someone helping. Someone to support you and help you do what you know how to do because they know what you don't. I know PTSD. I don't know how to do everything else that they know but they won't share. What goes around comes around and just as I share what I've learned about PTSD to make life easier, they won't share to make my life easier even though I've been proven right sooner or later. I knew PTSD would explode in 2001 and spent my own money to get my book published in 2002. Did this matter? No.
Congress didn't listen, the media didn't listen, service groups didn't listen and now, they are still not listening while I feel like John the Baptist screaming in the wilderness getting my neck ready for the chopping block. If I don't get some financial help soon, I will have to stop because I won't be able to afford the Internet or the roof over my head. I've been out of work for almost two years, in other words, without a paycheck, but working for free doing this work. If you can't afford to donate, believe me, I understand. Most of the charities I used to donate to haven't received donations from me this year either. What you can do is offer a prayer for me and my work. You can pass on my work to others on your email list and spread the word. The more hits I get, the less I am ignored.
There has to be someone out there somewhere able and willing to help me but I have yet to find them. I've been blessed with a few that have reached out to help as much as they can, but "the harvest is plenty and the workers are few" leaving me out here pretty much alone.
If you trust me, believe in an "average person" like you trying to make a difference, then please help me so that I can keep helping them heal.
Monday, December 14, 2009
Stolen Valor:Steven Douglas Burton
Military Impostors Are Neither Few Nor Proud
Richard C. Paddock
San Francisco Correspondent
(Dec. 14) -- Steven Douglas Burton wore the Marine Corps uniform proudly. He had rows of medals, including a prestigious Navy Cross, a Purple Heart and a Bronze Star.
He posted a photo of himself in uniform and blogged about serving one tour of duty in Afghanistan and four in Iraq. He was at the Battle of Fallujah, he said, and praised the doctors who "patched us up."
But Burton wasn't a hero. He was a fraud who purchased medals online.
A scam that began two years ago when Burton wore a Marine Corps uniform as a Halloween party costume ended Monday with a guilty plea in federal court in Riverside, Calif.
Burton, a 39-year-old bank employee from Palm Springs, was unmasked after he wore the uniform of a Marine lieutenant colonel to his 20-year high school reunion. A classmate who was a Navy commander became suspicious of his story, got him to pose for a photo and handed it over to the FBI.
Burton pleaded guilty to a single count of the unauthorized wearing of a military medal. He faces up to a year in prison and a $100,000 fine for violating the Stolen Valor Act, which prohibits wearing an unearned medal or falsely claiming to have earned one.
"The defendant was wearing some of the highest military honors given in this country for valor," said Assistant U.S. Attorney Joseph Akrotirianakis, who prosecuted the case. "He never served in the military."
read more here
Military Impostors Are Neither Few Nor Proud
Richard C. Paddock
San Francisco Correspondent
(Dec. 14) -- Steven Douglas Burton wore the Marine Corps uniform proudly. He had rows of medals, including a prestigious Navy Cross, a Purple Heart and a Bronze Star.
He posted a photo of himself in uniform and blogged about serving one tour of duty in Afghanistan and four in Iraq. He was at the Battle of Fallujah, he said, and praised the doctors who "patched us up."
But Burton wasn't a hero. He was a fraud who purchased medals online.
A scam that began two years ago when Burton wore a Marine Corps uniform as a Halloween party costume ended Monday with a guilty plea in federal court in Riverside, Calif.
Burton, a 39-year-old bank employee from Palm Springs, was unmasked after he wore the uniform of a Marine lieutenant colonel to his 20-year high school reunion. A classmate who was a Navy commander became suspicious of his story, got him to pose for a photo and handed it over to the FBI.
Burton pleaded guilty to a single count of the unauthorized wearing of a military medal. He faces up to a year in prison and a $100,000 fine for violating the Stolen Valor Act, which prohibits wearing an unearned medal or falsely claiming to have earned one.
"The defendant was wearing some of the highest military honors given in this country for valor," said Assistant U.S. Attorney Joseph Akrotirianakis, who prosecuted the case. "He never served in the military."
read more here
Military Impostors Are Neither Few Nor Proud
Back from combat, women struggle for acceptance
Back from combat, women struggle for acceptance
By KIMBERLY HEFLING (AP)
WASHINGTON — Nobody wants to buy them a beer.
Even near military bases, female veterans who served in Iraq and Afghanistan aren't often offered a drink on the house as a welcome home.
More than 230,000 American women have fought in those recent wars and at least 120 have died doing so, yet the public still doesn't completely understand their contributions on the modern battlefield.
For some, it's a lonely transition as they struggle to find their place.
Aimee Sherrod, an Air Force veteran who did three war tours, said years went by when she didn't tell people she was a veteran. After facing sexual harassment during two tours and mortar attacks in Iraq, the 29-year-old mother of two from Bells, Tenn., was medically discharged in 2005 with post-traumatic stress disorder.
She's haunted by nightmares and wakes up some nights thinking she's under attack. She's moody as a result of PTSD and can't function enough to work or attend college. Like some other veterans, she felt she improperly received a low disability rating by the Department of Veterans Affairs that left her with a token monthly payment. She was frustrated that her paperwork mentioned she was pregnant, a factor she thought was irrelevant.
"I just gave up on it and I didn't tell anyone about ever being in the military because I was so ashamed over everything," Sherrod said.
read more here
Back from combat, women struggle for acceptance
By KIMBERLY HEFLING (AP)
WASHINGTON — Nobody wants to buy them a beer.
Even near military bases, female veterans who served in Iraq and Afghanistan aren't often offered a drink on the house as a welcome home.
More than 230,000 American women have fought in those recent wars and at least 120 have died doing so, yet the public still doesn't completely understand their contributions on the modern battlefield.
For some, it's a lonely transition as they struggle to find their place.
Aimee Sherrod, an Air Force veteran who did three war tours, said years went by when she didn't tell people she was a veteran. After facing sexual harassment during two tours and mortar attacks in Iraq, the 29-year-old mother of two from Bells, Tenn., was medically discharged in 2005 with post-traumatic stress disorder.
She's haunted by nightmares and wakes up some nights thinking she's under attack. She's moody as a result of PTSD and can't function enough to work or attend college. Like some other veterans, she felt she improperly received a low disability rating by the Department of Veterans Affairs that left her with a token monthly payment. She was frustrated that her paperwork mentioned she was pregnant, a factor she thought was irrelevant.
"I just gave up on it and I didn't tell anyone about ever being in the military because I was so ashamed over everything," Sherrod said.
read more here
Back from combat, women struggle for acceptance
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