Monday, October 25, 2010

Will you love them enough to learn?

by
Chaplain Kathie

My husband was married before we met. He was married soon after he came back from Vietnam. During their six years together, she didn't want to know about Vietnam, had no tolerance for his nightmares, flashbacks or short term memory loss. She didn't want to hear anything about Vietnam and they separated so many times he lost count. She just couldn't take it and this, this was when his PTSD was mild.

His Dad, a WWII veteran with a Purple Heart and Bronze Star, didn't want to talk to him about war at all other than a few stories about some of his friends. His Mom didn't want to talk to him about anything other than what she wanted him to do for her.

Friends didn't want to listen and he never felt he could talk to any of them even if they were willing to listen. A few of them were also Vietnam veterans but they didn't talk about much either. There was no communication and no support. They had nothing to really connect. No emails with buddies back home in the states. No news reports from around the country. No books on PTSD with personal stories were written. There were only clinical books for me to read when we met and I wanted to find out why this veteran was so much different than everyone else in my family.

My Dad was a disabled Korean Vet and my uncles served in WWII. My husband was totally different.

Today there is the Internet, books, videos, media attention, sites like this one putting together news reports from around the country and more programs than I can remember, yet today there are still high numbers of divorce, suicides and attempted suicides with more and more veterans ending up homeless from Iraq and Afghanistan. Their families and friends are not perfect. Most of them have the same attitude my husband's inner circle did when they could have been trying to be supportive instead of telling him to "get over it" and stop.

Today wives like me are no longer left in the abyss trying to claw their way out alone because they have a lifeline to reach for, but too many never take hold of it. Their families, spouse and kids, suffer just as much as they do but they have the power to end the suffering and begin the healing. They have the power within their reach but they just won't take it.

Do they love their veteran enough to learn? Do they care enough to find out what they can do to help instead of judge and blame?

My husband's ex-wife didn't care enough to find out what she was facing and their marriage ended after six years. We've been married for 26 years and with all the heartache and struggles, I wouldn't have missed a day of it because in the process of learning what I could do for him, I discovered a more marvelous man under all the pain he carried.

All of us can discover the people they really are under all the pain when we care enough to learn and help them heal. In the process, we heal ourselves, forgive what caused us pain because we understand what is behind it and know how to respond to help them see the person they are under all of it.

Sunday, October 24, 2010

College Hosts PTSD Seminar

College Hosts PTSD Seminar
One Of Five Soldiers Return With Disorder

By: Fred Halstied

COLORADO SPRINGS, Colo. -- A recent study shows that one out of five soldiers returns from Iraq or Afghanistan with post traumatic stress disorder, or PTSD.
On Saturday, the University of Phoenix held a workshop teaching counseling professionals how to diagnose and treat local soldiers who have this condition.
"Military personnel are returning to Colorado Springs with their families, and they're abusing drugs," said Jody Tomberlin, licensed clinical social worker. "When soldiers return from the Middle East, they often have angry outburst, resulting in bar fights, domestic violence, and difficulty holding jobs."
read more here
College Hosts PTSD Seminar

Resilience training won't work tomorrow if yesterday is an example

It doesn't have to be as bad as it has been but as long as they take this kind of approach, it is unlikely to get better any time soon. "Resilience training" has not worked up until now and that is reflected by the ever increasing suicides along with attempted suicides. Drug and alcohol abuse are up, arrests are up so much so many states have rightly set up Veterans Courts, mental health claims are up, divorces are up and the list goes on.





Comprehensive Soldier Fitness

Resilience training and post traumatic stress disorder
Resilience training reflects a strength-based, positive psychology approach to Warrior behavioral health. It is designed for Warriors, Leaders, Spouses, Families and behavioral health providers. Training and information is targeted to all phases of the Warrior deployment cycle, Warrior life cycle and Warrior support system.
Do you believe this training will prepare you to cope with deployment and the effects of deployment, to include post traumatic stress disorder?
For more information on Resilience Training, visit https://www.resilience.army.mil/.
None of what we're seeing has to happen as long as they start to look at what has worked instead of what has failed.

I've been married 26 years but other couples have lasted 30 to 40 years while sharing a home with PTSD. We raised our kids to understand why their Dad acts the way he does and they didn't end up blaming themselves. We got our emotions out of the way and reacted with our intelligence using the view of a wounded combat veteran standing in front of us instead of some kind of jerk out to cause a fight. We helped them see all the good within them because we were able to forgive and we were able to forgive because we understood there was a reason behind what they did.

Above all, we helped them forgive themselves.

PTSD comes after trauma. From an outside force attacking them. It hits the emotional part of their brain. Under 25, this part is not fully developed. In other words, their character is not carved in stone yet. Exposure to traumatic events in combat weighs heavily on them and the number of times they are exposed to it, crushes them. Our job is to take the weight off their souls brick by brick. It was that way for wives of Vietnam Vets and will be that way for today's veterans.

It doesn't matter if the people in their lives are a spouse, sibling or parent or even a friend. We are the ones on the front lines of this. While they fight the battles in combat, we must fight the battles for their lives but we must do so fully armed with understanding, love, forgiveness and patience with them. "Resilience training" should not be geared toward them but should be geared toward us so that we have the ability to help them heal. From what I've seen, this attempt falls flat because the people running this type of program have little understanding what it is like to be in their boots 24-7 or live with them.

None of what we see has to happen but much we have done should happen. It won't as long as the powers that be will not listen to what has worked because they are too busy asking what has failed. If the people in their lives get emotionally hurt, then they turn away from them. Most of this comes from lack of understanding and looking at them as if they were the way they used to be. Homeless veterans, for the most part, can be tracked back to coming back with PTSD and families that were destroyed by it because no one understood why any of the damage done was happening to them. Want to really make a difference, then start what what already has. The track record of aware Vietnam veterans' families proves nothing is impossible.

Free Meals for Veterans

News from Military Connection

Free Meals for Military and Veterans
McCormick & Schmick's. For the 11th year in a row, the 87 locations in 25 states are offering free entrees to veterans on Sunday, Nov. 7th. The chain also requests military ID and highly recommends reservations. The promotion is on Sunday instead of Veterans Day, "because it allows vets to bring their families who might not be available during the week," CEO Bill Freeman says.
Golden Corral is offering free buffet meals - including beverage and dessert - to current military and veterans on Monday, Nov. 16, from 5 to 9 p.m. No military ID is required for its ninth annual Military Appreciation Monday, according to Dolly Mercer, national events manager. The event is held on this date, she says, "so we don't interfere with Veterans Day activities."
Applebee's is offering a free entree on Wednesday to veterans and all active-duty military from 11 a.m. to midnight at all 1,900 locations. Although Applebee's requests some kind of military ID, "We're not going to argue with folks who might forget to bring it," says Sam Rothschild, senior vice president of operations.
Krispy Kreme Doughnut Corporation is offering free doughnuts to all Veterans and active military personnel. Just visit any participating Krispy Kreme to redeem your free doughnuts. No identification required but keep it available anyway.
Outback Steakhouse - Free Blooming Onion and beverage.

Saturday, October 23, 2010

GOP Trick or threat?

I don't know what has happened to the people of this country but if I get into one more conversation with a smart person spouting off nonsense, I think I may just stop trying to set them straight and let them go off believing whatever they want so they can look totally stupid to someone without any patience at all.

Support For Veterans Shows Sharp Partisan Divide
Posted in Main Blog (All Posts) on October 23rd, 2010 4:39 am by HL
Support For Veterans Shows Sharp Partisan Divide
According to an analysis by the nonpartisan Iraq & Afghanistan Veterans of America Action Fund, Republicans in Congress have dramatically failed to support our troops after they come home. IAVA’s 2010 Veteran Report Card, based on the key veterans’ legislation that came to a vote during the 111th Congress, exposed a sharp partisan divide on […]

According to an analysis by the nonpartisan Iraq & Afghanistan Veterans of America Action Fund, Republicans in Congress have dramatically failed to support our troops after they come home. IAVA’s 2010 Veteran Report Card, based on the key veterans’ legislation that came to a vote during the 111th Congress, exposed a sharp partisan divide on the level of support for Iraq and Afghanistan veterans, as MSNBC’s Rachel Maddow tabulated yesterday. Of the 94 elected officials that earned an A or A+ rating from IAVA, 91 were Democrats. Of the 154 officials who received a D or F, 142 were Republicans:
read the rest here

Support For Veterans Shows Sharp Partisan Divide

It has been my job to know what the truth is and I can tell you that this is true. I listened to them talk for far too long to understand the difference between talk and real action. They say they support the troops and the veterans but on their agenda, their actual plans, they want to hand over the VA to private corporations, along with Social Security and Medicare while getting rid of the Department of Education. This is how they plan to knock down the deficit plus making sure we go back to the days when people ended up without medical care because they didn't have insurance. That is exactly what all the fighting has been about but they twist and snare words from fact so suit themselves on a daily basis.

Take down here in Florida for example. Grayson and Kosmos have been accused of cutting Medicare along with Nancy Pelosi. This accusation was by GOP contributors. The same people always talking about the deficit and how government doesn't work. These three people did in fact cut Medicare but they did it from cutting waste, fraud and abuse, while the commercial wants people to think someone lost benefits. How dumb is that? The very people wanting to cut it are accusing watchdogs of doing it? Where were will these people be when our parents are elderly and need medical care along with a social security check to be able to live after working all their lives? It's bad enough these same people stopped an increase in Social Security and Veterans cost of living raises last year and plan to do the same this year.

I've heard enough and read enough to know that when it comes to really caring about the people this country was built by and sustained by, they couldn't care less.

I heard them say there wasn't enough money to take care of our veterans because, if you can believe their own words, "there are two wars to pay for" at the same time Iraq and Afghanistan were never included in the budgets until Obama, the man they love to hate, decided they were important enough to include in the budget and pay for. They complain about so many things needing to be paid for when it matters to us but when it comes to the rich people in this country, nothing is too good for them.

The simple truth is if you read and check their voting record, notice all the bills they stopped in the Senate including how they voted against the GI Bill, pay raises for the troops and cost of living raises for our disabled veterans, then you will know that if you still think they deserve your vote, you should be prepared to have people laugh because your fly is down or your dress is stuck in your underwear, because you'll not only look that dumb, you'll be to blame for us going back to the days when no one cared about anyone but themselves.

They just didn't care about us when they blocked so many bills because power trumped all else. They figured if Obama fails then we'll be suffering so much we'd want them back but they didn't count on how bright we all are and we figured out that in the end, none of us matter to them but we do matter to the people who have been fighting for us since 2007 when the Democrats took back control of the committees and things began to work for common folk like us. Don't let the GOP trick you into not knowing when you are being threatened with what they want to do to us so you forget who has been trying to do things for us!


Rant for the week concluded.

Friday, October 22, 2010

Senator Doran says "Pentagon dropped the ball on chemical exposure of US Troops in Iraq"

FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE FOR MORE INFORMATION:

Friday CONTACT: Barry E. Piatt

October 22, 2010 PHONE: 202-224-0577



Follow up report is delayed:



DORGAN: DOD IG REPORT CONFIRMS PENTAGON DROPPED THE BALL ON CHEMICAL EXPOSURE OF U.S. TROOPS IN IRAQ



(WASHINGTON, D.C.) --- U.S. Senator Byron Dorgan (D-ND) said Friday a preliminary report of an investigation by the Department of Defense Inspector General confirms that the Pentagon dropped the ball in responding to the exposure of hundreds of U.S. troops to a deadly chemical in Iraq. Those failures left some exposed soldiers unaware that they had been exposed to the deadly chemical and without follow up health monitoring and treatment. Monitoring tests performed on other soldiers who were informed of their exposure were so inadequate that the agency that performed them now admits they have a “low level of confidence” in those tests.



A second and more detailed Inspector General’s report, originally scheduled to be released this month, has now been moved back to the end of the year, a development Dorgan said he finds “disappointing.”



The Senate Armed Services Committee and Dorgan requested IG investigations after he chaired hearings by the Senate Democratic Policy Committee (DPC), in June 2008 and August 2009. The hearings revealed that troops from Indiana, Oregon, South Carolina, and West Virginia were exposed to sodium dichromate, a known and highly potent carcinogen at the Qarmat Ali water treatment facility in Iraq. The DPC hearings revealed multiple failures by the contractor, KBR, and the Army’s failure to adequately monitor, test, and notify soldiers who may have been exposed of the health risks they may now face.



The IG is releasing two reports on its investigation, The first report was released in September. The second, expected to be a more detailed response to specific DPC concerns, was originally slated for release by late October. But the Department of Defense Inspector General now states a draft of that report won’t be available until the end of the year.



The first report provides no indication -- seven years after the exposure – that the Army ever notified seven soldiers from the Army’s Third Infantry Division who secured the Qarmat Ali facility during hostilities that they had been exposed. It also confirms that the Army’s assessment of the health risks associated with exposure to sodium dichromate for soldiers at Qarmat Ali are not very reliable. In fact, the organization that performed these assessments, the U.S. Army Center for Health Promotion and Preventative Medicine (CHPPM), now says it has a “low level of confidence” in its test results for the overwhelming majority of those exposed.



Equally troubling, Dorgan said, is the report’s finding that the Department of Defense is refusing to provide information to Congress about the incident, because of a lawsuit to which it is not a party.



“I am very concerned about the findings we now have, and I am disappointed in the delayed release of Part II of this report. The IG’s investigation and its findings are very important to the lives of U.S. soldiers and workers who were at the site. Details and definitive findings will help us ensure accountability for this exposure and flawed follow up, but even more importantly, they will help ensure that all exposed soldiers receive appropriate notice and medical attention,” Dorgan said.

As a death notification team "It wasn't supposed to be like this."

It wasn't supposed to be like this

Posted 10/18/2010

Commentary by Lt. Col. Jonathan Tamblyn
54th Air Refueling Squadron commander

10/18/2010 - ALTUS AIR FORCE BASE, Okla. (AFNS) -- After parking the Air Force staff car beside the yard, the chaplain, the nurse and I got out of the car and took a moment to look over each other's service dress. We had been steeling ourselves for this moment most of the afternoon.

As a death notification team, it was our job to inform a newly bereaved father about the tragic death of his Air Force son.

In a very rare Air Force Personnel Center decision, the signed letter I would read to the father stated the suspected cause of death was suicide.

Many of you can't read the word "suicide" without feeling the pangs of a tragic loss you have already experienced in your life due to someone else's decision to prematurely end his or her own life. Although the pain of suicide is staggering, the risk of suicide may be more pervasive than previously thought.

In a 2008 study by the Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration, it was found that "nearly 8.3 million adults (age 18 and older) in the U.S. had serious thoughts of suicide in the past year."

The study also showed that 2.3 million adult Americans made a suicide plan within the past year and that 1.1 million adults actually attempted suicide within the past year."

Hidden within these staggering statistics, you find too many servicemembers who have also been suicidal.

Lately, military suicides have been on the rise.

The Houston Chronicle did an analysis and found suicides of "Texans younger than 35 who served in the military jumped from 47 in 2006 to 66 in 2009 -- an increase of 40 percent."

As sobering as the statistics can be, there are some things we can do to help reduce the risk of losing an Airman, coworker, friend or family member to suicide.
read more here
http://www.af.mil/news/story.asp?id=123226803

Kentucky family sues over shooting death at Fort Bliss

Ky. family sues over shooting death at Fort Bliss
By BRETT BARROUQUERE Associated Press Writer © 2010 The Associated Press
Oct. 20, 2010, 4:10PM


LOUISVILLE, Ky. — The family of a teenager killed during a shooting at a post in Texas is suing the U.S. government for $8.75 million, claiming the military was negligent in diagnosing and treating the alleged shooter.

Renee Richardson of Louisville, whose 18-year-old son, Ezra Gerald Smith, died in the April 24, 2009 shootings at Fort Bliss in Texas, claims the U.S. Army missed multiple warning signs that Spc. Gerald Polanco was suffering from numerous psychiatric disorders, including post traumatic stress disorder.

"This could have been prevented and that's what she's mad about," attorney Sheila Hiestand said of her client.

Richardson filed suit Wednesday in U.S. District Court in Louisville.

Polanco was charged with murder, but ruled incompetent to stand trial by a military judge a few months later. Polanco's current condition was not immediately available. His attorney, John Convery of San Antonio, Texas, did not immediately return a call from The Associated Press seeking comment.

Army Maj. Myles Caggins III, a spokesman for Fort Bliss, told The Associated Press that Polanco's court martial proceedings are ongoing and declined to comment.

"Our heart goes out to the family of Gerald Smith," Caggins said. "We are committed to fair and thorough legal proceedings in accordance with the Uniform Code of Military Justice."

In letters to Smith's family, the military denied liability for the shooting, saying Polanco's actions could not have been foreseen.

Smith was at Fort Bliss, where his stepfather was based at the time of the shooting.
read more here
http://www.chron.com/disp/story.mpl/ap/tx/7256084.html

Huron police searching for missing Iraq War veteran

Huron police searching for missing Iraq War veteran
Published: Thursday, October 21, 2010
By JAMILA T. WILLIAMS
jwilliams@MorningJournal.com

HURON — A 21-year-old Iraq War veteran is still missing and divers searched the Huron River yesterday but didn’t find anything, Huron police Chief John Majoy said.

Nathan Dickey was reported missing after he did not return home Sunday evening following a night out with friends, according to the Huron Police Department.
go here for more
Huron police searching for missing Iraq War veteran

Friends of missing Iraq war veteran wait, hope, pray
HEATHER CHAPIN-FOWLER
It’s a grueling wait for Nathan Dickey’s family and friends as they look to police to solve the Iraq war veteran’s mysterious disappearance.

Dickey’s friends gathered Wednesday evening outside the Brass Pelican near the Huron River, where earlier this week the missing man’s shoe was found in the river.

“He’s an excellent guy,” said Casey Gonzalez, Dickey’s friend from Columbus. “We’re all a tight bunch and we’re just waiting, hoping for the best.”

Gonzalez recalled the last time he saw Dickey — just weeks ago at Cedar Point — and he’s hoping it’s not the last time he’d see his friend alive.

Dickey’s friends reported him missing Sunday evening after a night of drinking at i5’s Bar and Grill in downtown Huron. Dickey was with the group Saturday night, but at 2 a.m. Sunday he wandered off into the early morning darkness.

He was drunk and upset about problems within the group, a police report said.

It’s the last time anyone saw him alive.
read more of this here
Friends of missing Iraq war veteran wait

Veteran Guards Christian Flag At City's Memorial

Since this is a memorial, there should be no problem with the "Christian" flag flying at all. There doesn't seem to be any rule about preventing other faiths from flying a flag there too so there should really be no problem.  What's next? Removing the headstones with crosses on them from cemeteries?

Air Force veteran Ray Martini guards a Christian flag
Lynn Hey/AP
Ray Martini, an Air Force veteran, stands beside a Christian flag flying in front of the Veterans Memorial at Central Park in King, N.C., on Saturday. Martini launched a round-the-clock vigil to guard the new flag after it was taken down because of complaints.

Veteran Guards Christian Flag At City's Memorial
by THE ASSOCIATED PRESS

October 21, 2010
The Christian flag is everywhere in the small city of King, N.C.: flying in front of barbecue joints and hair salons, stuck to the bumpers of trucks, hanging in windows and emblazoned on T-shirts.

The relatively obscure emblem has become omnipresent because of one place it can't appear: flying above a war memorial in a public park.

The city council decided last month to remove the flag from above the monument in Central Park after a resident complained, and after city leaders got letters from the American Civil Liberties Union and Americans United for the Separation of Church and State urging them to remove it.

That decision incensed veterans groups, churches and others in King, a city of about 6,000 people 15 miles north of Winston-Salem. Ray Martini, 63, an Air Force veteran who served in Vietnam, launched a round-the-clock vigil to guard a replica Christian flag hanging on a wooden pole in front of the war memorial.

Since Sept. 22, the vigil has been bolstered by home-cooked food delivered by supporters, sleeping bags and blankets donated by a West Virginia man and offers of support from New York to Louisiana.
read more here
Veteran Guards Christian Flag