Same-sex military couples to benefit from court ruling
KDH News
Brandon Janes
Herald staff writer
Posted on June 30, 2013
Less than two years since soldiers at Fort Hood were prohibited from being openly gay, same-sex married couples in the Army now have more rights than other same-sex Texas couples.
After the Supreme Court’s rejection of the Defense of Marriage Act last week, all military spouses will now receive full military benefits, regardless of their sexual orientation, the Pentagon said.
Many federal agencies, including the Social Security Administration and the Internal Revenue Service, look at where you live before issuing marriage benefits — such as filing joint tax returns.
The Department of Defense, however, looks at where you were married to decide what benefits you receive.
Same-sex military couples who were married in one of the 13 states that issue same-sex marriage licenses will now receive their federal benefits regardless of the state or country where they live.
read more here
Sunday, June 30, 2013
Bliss of the Old Soul
Bliss of the Old Soul
Wounded Times Blog
Kathie Costos
June 30, 2013
Today is the end of PTSD Awareness Month. On Thursday Kathleen Sebelius wrote about it with this on the end of her piece.
My focus has always been on veterans and their families but for today, we should talk about all people suffering after traumatic events. After all, we are all still just only human. There are events in our lives that change us. Sometimes people think events make us stronger but they avoid acknowledging the inner strength was already there and was merely given the opportunity shine. The power of the human soul/spirit is something we are all born with. The trick is getting all parts of us connected.
There are some people with everything inside of them working together and they are able to retain bliss in any circumstance. They grieve but are not destroyed. They are saddened but do not lose hope. They are the people walking away after traumatic events believing they were there for a reason, no matter how great or small. They do not think God did it to them or punished them but they survived by the Grace of God.
For others, especially when they hear the stupidly delivered fix it fast slogan "God only gives us what we can handle" they walk away believing they were just punished for something. No one was watching over them. They had been judged. What do you think they will think after hearing those words? God sent His angels to spare them or God sent the angels to harm them?
There is another group closely connected to the first group that needs to be explored so that we can actually do something meaningful on healing PTSD. First we need to understand people like me. I am nothing special. I have an expression that pretty much sums up what life is like for me. "I have finally arrived at a point in my life where I have succeeded at failing."
It sounds bad but in reality it isn't. Everything I have tried to do with my life has failed when you consider that we all equate success with financial gain. I can't pay my bills, find financial support or even begin to pay back my student loans. Everything I do people expect me to do for free and the two books I wrote so far have cost me money instead of making money. Some veterans and family members I helped over the years simply moved on and some of them started their own groups but forget all about me. All of this does tend to cause some depression but I get over it. Why? Because I know I am doing what I was intended to do no matter how great, no matter how small.
When I was working as Administrator of Christian Education for a local church, I asked the youth pastor how she came up with sermons so far in advance. She told me that most of the time she just went by the calendar but when she was inspired to write a sermon, she just went with what was inside of her. It didn't matter how well it went over or not because she was writing it for who was intended to hear it. She just trusted the guidance of her soul. I have heard some of those sermons and frankly there was some kind of divine map questing going on. There were usually several people reacting to the message.
While others may have thought it was not a good sermon, the people needing to hear it got the message because they had connected to it because she connected to her soul and listened.
We all have that capacity. All my life I knew I was supposed to be a writer. My English teacher, Mr. Aucone said I had talent and should be a writer. He also told me that if he just graded me on spelling, there is no way I would have gotten an A. Back then we didn't have spell check.
There was no guarantee I would be a good writer and my goals were pretty uncomplicated. In my high school year book my only goal was to graduate.
After having TBI as a four year old, things in my head didn't work the same. For the way my brain takes in information it is easy to lose it fast. I had to come up with tricks to fix what didn't work. One of them is spelling so I thank God for spell check. Considering I am from the Boston area with a full accent and they taught phoenix in school very little has the same spelling as it sounds. The other is the rule of grammar especially when I am writing something that raises my passion level to boiling. Then there is another. Important things I need to hang onto have to find room in my long term memory so I have kick somethings out to fit them in. When I read something I can remember when I had read something else. That is how I come up with old news reports to prove something is not new or prove the new report false. Still it is not the TBI that almost cut me off from listening to my soul. It was everything else that happened.
From 4 to 40 it was one traumatic event after another starting with my Dad. He was a violent alcoholic until I was 13. I lived in fear that he would lash out at my Mom and brothers but even though he never went after me, I feared he would. One day he did on accident. He was pulling apart the living room and didn't see me on the couch. He threw a chair and it hit me. He was devastated. Long story short it was around then that he decided to stop drinking and got help. There was a car accident I should not have walked away from. My ex-husband tried to kill me, then he stalked me for a year. A miscarriage caused me to hemorrhage when I lost twins. Another health crisis after our daughter was born and a massive infection took over. You get the point. Then the biggest reason was living all these years with my husband and what PTSD was doing to him after Vietnam. It was not until years later when all the investigation I had been doing on PTSD that I finally got the clue I had been looking for. What made me different from him?
For my husband his trauma came in Phu Bia Vietnam 7 years before I graduated high school. When we met I didn't have a clue what happened in Vietnam and even less about what war did to those we sent. When it came to PTSD, he had a much different experience than even I could understand. My traumatic events changed me but in a different way than his did. I spent the rest of my life trying to understand why I didn't have it as much as I wanted to understand why he did.
The difference was the way everything in me was connected. Not just my mind, body and spirit connected together but connected back to God and where my soul came from. When you can find bliss in any condition, that is what is happening. After traumatic events caused by natural events, there is not just the event but the threat of it happening again. That only happens when the weather report warns you. Like the hurricanes that hit Florida in 2004, only months after we moved here. We went through three of them. The only other time we worry is when something is in the Gulf. There is a huge difference between the type of PTSD survivors of a natural disaster can end up with compared to one done by other humans.
Accidents, crimes including abuse, death of a loved on and health issues can cause PTSD. I went through all of them and some hit me pretty hard but I recovered. These events did change me and the way I think but my strength was not something that developed. It was already there. It is one of the biggest reasons why I find the military's efforts on teaching "resilience" so repulsive. They are trying to teach something to people who already have it without telling them how to find it and get it working with the rest of everything else within them.
My strength was living within my soul and my soul is older than my body since my soul was created long before my body was born. My body is not perfect. It is getting older but will never catch up to the age of my soul. It is from my soul that I was able to make peace with what was done to me in every part of living. To know that God did not do it to me, but in fact, He spared me for whatever reason from the time I was 4, helped me have peace with my faith in Him. To know that I did the best I could with whatever I tried to do helped me find peace with myself. I am not haunted by the past but I am not strengthened by it either. I am only stronger because every part of me works together. When my body is weak, my head tells me to rest and do what I can until strength comes back. When my mind is weak, my spirit takes over. It all works together.
Whatever living does to us can be so much better if we make peace with what has been as much as we find peace living with whatever it is in this moment. When I say I have finally succeeded at failing, I am telling you that no matter what, I am at peace with all that came before, all that is and have faith that whatever comes next, it will turn out however it was meant to be. I no longer seek permission of the world to do what I do. I do not expect anyone to understand what I have to say as much as I expect the people hearing it need to hear it.
The best example I can give on this is often overlooked. When we talk about Christ it is easy to think of the 12 walking with Him but we forget there were many more.
We do not know their names but they are not less important than the others they were with on the same mission. Maybe they may have wanted to be as famous as the others but I am sure they found peace with what was required of them instead of what was required of the others. I wonder if they fully understood the impact they really had because had it not been for that multitude, Christianity may not have spread as much as it did because they reached more people and the people they reached, reached even more.
In the end the thing we all have to understand is that we make a difference in lives, no matter how great or small. When we follow where our old souls lead us, we find bliss on this journey. It is not how others view the outcome of our lives but it is how we view it. The sooner we make peace with what happened, the sooner were are ready for what comes next and that, that we can face with all that comes within this old soul.
Wounded Times Blog
Kathie Costos
June 30, 2013
Today is the end of PTSD Awareness Month. On Thursday Kathleen Sebelius wrote about it with this on the end of her piece.
During PTSD Awareness Month, PTSD Awareness Day on June 27, and all year long, we are determined to help our fellow Americans and their families and friends dealing with this debilitating condition. Through continued support for research, education, and treatment, we can help provide the hope and reality of recovery for all for those living with PTSD.Millions of Americans suffer from Post Traumatic Stress Disorder but with all the raising awareness happening year after year, we have arrived in a place and time when 40 years of research has produced more suicides and attempted suicides, families falling apart and homelessness.
My focus has always been on veterans and their families but for today, we should talk about all people suffering after traumatic events. After all, we are all still just only human. There are events in our lives that change us. Sometimes people think events make us stronger but they avoid acknowledging the inner strength was already there and was merely given the opportunity shine. The power of the human soul/spirit is something we are all born with. The trick is getting all parts of us connected.
There are some people with everything inside of them working together and they are able to retain bliss in any circumstance. They grieve but are not destroyed. They are saddened but do not lose hope. They are the people walking away after traumatic events believing they were there for a reason, no matter how great or small. They do not think God did it to them or punished them but they survived by the Grace of God.
For others, especially when they hear the stupidly delivered fix it fast slogan "God only gives us what we can handle" they walk away believing they were just punished for something. No one was watching over them. They had been judged. What do you think they will think after hearing those words? God sent His angels to spare them or God sent the angels to harm them?
There is another group closely connected to the first group that needs to be explored so that we can actually do something meaningful on healing PTSD. First we need to understand people like me. I am nothing special. I have an expression that pretty much sums up what life is like for me. "I have finally arrived at a point in my life where I have succeeded at failing."
It sounds bad but in reality it isn't. Everything I have tried to do with my life has failed when you consider that we all equate success with financial gain. I can't pay my bills, find financial support or even begin to pay back my student loans. Everything I do people expect me to do for free and the two books I wrote so far have cost me money instead of making money. Some veterans and family members I helped over the years simply moved on and some of them started their own groups but forget all about me. All of this does tend to cause some depression but I get over it. Why? Because I know I am doing what I was intended to do no matter how great, no matter how small.
When I was working as Administrator of Christian Education for a local church, I asked the youth pastor how she came up with sermons so far in advance. She told me that most of the time she just went by the calendar but when she was inspired to write a sermon, she just went with what was inside of her. It didn't matter how well it went over or not because she was writing it for who was intended to hear it. She just trusted the guidance of her soul. I have heard some of those sermons and frankly there was some kind of divine map questing going on. There were usually several people reacting to the message.
While others may have thought it was not a good sermon, the people needing to hear it got the message because they had connected to it because she connected to her soul and listened.
We all have that capacity. All my life I knew I was supposed to be a writer. My English teacher, Mr. Aucone said I had talent and should be a writer. He also told me that if he just graded me on spelling, there is no way I would have gotten an A. Back then we didn't have spell check.
From 4 to 40 it was one traumatic event after another starting with my Dad. He was a violent alcoholic until I was 13. I lived in fear that he would lash out at my Mom and brothers but even though he never went after me, I feared he would. One day he did on accident. He was pulling apart the living room and didn't see me on the couch. He threw a chair and it hit me. He was devastated. Long story short it was around then that he decided to stop drinking and got help. There was a car accident I should not have walked away from. My ex-husband tried to kill me, then he stalked me for a year. A miscarriage caused me to hemorrhage when I lost twins. Another health crisis after our daughter was born and a massive infection took over. You get the point. Then the biggest reason was living all these years with my husband and what PTSD was doing to him after Vietnam. It was not until years later when all the investigation I had been doing on PTSD that I finally got the clue I had been looking for. What made me different from him?
For my husband his trauma came in Phu Bia Vietnam 7 years before I graduated high school. When we met I didn't have a clue what happened in Vietnam and even less about what war did to those we sent. When it came to PTSD, he had a much different experience than even I could understand. My traumatic events changed me but in a different way than his did. I spent the rest of my life trying to understand why I didn't have it as much as I wanted to understand why he did.
The difference was the way everything in me was connected. Not just my mind, body and spirit connected together but connected back to God and where my soul came from. When you can find bliss in any condition, that is what is happening. After traumatic events caused by natural events, there is not just the event but the threat of it happening again. That only happens when the weather report warns you. Like the hurricanes that hit Florida in 2004, only months after we moved here. We went through three of them. The only other time we worry is when something is in the Gulf. There is a huge difference between the type of PTSD survivors of a natural disaster can end up with compared to one done by other humans.
Accidents, crimes including abuse, death of a loved on and health issues can cause PTSD. I went through all of them and some hit me pretty hard but I recovered. These events did change me and the way I think but my strength was not something that developed. It was already there. It is one of the biggest reasons why I find the military's efforts on teaching "resilience" so repulsive. They are trying to teach something to people who already have it without telling them how to find it and get it working with the rest of everything else within them.
My strength was living within my soul and my soul is older than my body since my soul was created long before my body was born. My body is not perfect. It is getting older but will never catch up to the age of my soul. It is from my soul that I was able to make peace with what was done to me in every part of living. To know that God did not do it to me, but in fact, He spared me for whatever reason from the time I was 4, helped me have peace with my faith in Him. To know that I did the best I could with whatever I tried to do helped me find peace with myself. I am not haunted by the past but I am not strengthened by it either. I am only stronger because every part of me works together. When my body is weak, my head tells me to rest and do what I can until strength comes back. When my mind is weak, my spirit takes over. It all works together.
Whatever living does to us can be so much better if we make peace with what has been as much as we find peace living with whatever it is in this moment. When I say I have finally succeeded at failing, I am telling you that no matter what, I am at peace with all that came before, all that is and have faith that whatever comes next, it will turn out however it was meant to be. I no longer seek permission of the world to do what I do. I do not expect anyone to understand what I have to say as much as I expect the people hearing it need to hear it.
The best example I can give on this is often overlooked. When we talk about Christ it is easy to think of the 12 walking with Him but we forget there were many more.
Jesus Sends Out the Seventy-Two
10 After this the Lord appointed seventy-two[a] others and sent them two by two ahead of him to every town and place where he was about to go. 2 He told them, “The harvest is plentiful, but the workers are few. Ask the Lord of the harvest, therefore, to send out workers into his harvest field. 3 Go! I am sending you out like lambs among wolves. 4 Do not take a purse or bag or sandals; and do not greet anyone on the road.
We do not know their names but they are not less important than the others they were with on the same mission. Maybe they may have wanted to be as famous as the others but I am sure they found peace with what was required of them instead of what was required of the others. I wonder if they fully understood the impact they really had because had it not been for that multitude, Christianity may not have spread as much as it did because they reached more people and the people they reached, reached even more.
In the end the thing we all have to understand is that we make a difference in lives, no matter how great or small. When we follow where our old souls lead us, we find bliss on this journey. It is not how others view the outcome of our lives but it is how we view it. The sooner we make peace with what happened, the sooner were are ready for what comes next and that, that we can face with all that comes within this old soul.
Florida Atheists put up monument to nothing
Some of my friends are very upset over Atheists putting up a monument near where the Ten Commandments monument is. I am no more upset about this than I am about the fact some people do not believe in God. It is up to them. If this is public land, then they have the same rights believers do. They do not harm my faith any more than idol worshipers hurt the faith of early Christians. As a matter of fact, how they treated the Christians in the beginning caused more people to hear about Christ and they ended up joining no matter what price they would have to pay. They worshiped in hiding knowing if they were caught, they would be put to death.
No one can ever control what is in the mind and hearts of others. This nation began so that all people could worship or not as they see fit. To feel threatened in anyway by a monument put up by Atheists that believe in nothing honors it. How can we complain about nothing? They have an equal right under the laws of this nation. I just find it ironic when they fear Christian symbols like the Cross, as if it does them any harm at all, then turn around and put up a symbol of their faith in nothing.
No one can ever control what is in the mind and hearts of others. This nation began so that all people could worship or not as they see fit. To feel threatened in anyway by a monument put up by Atheists that believe in nothing honors it. How can we complain about nothing? They have an equal right under the laws of this nation. I just find it ironic when they fear Christian symbols like the Cross, as if it does them any harm at all, then turn around and put up a symbol of their faith in nothing.
Atheists unveil monument in Florida and promise to build 50 more
RAW Story
By David Ferguson
Saturday, June 29, 2013
At the unveiling of the first-ever atheist monument erected on government public property Saturday, the organization American Atheists announced that they plan to erect more monuments at locations throughout the country. In a press release, American Atheists President David Silverman said that the organization has plans for 50 more monuments at public sites across the country.
The unveiling took place at noon on Saturday at the courthouse in Starke, Florida, where last year a Christian group erected a monument to the Christian Bible’s Ten Commandments. The new atheist monuments will be placed in similar locations, where Christian groups have erected monuments to their beliefs in public, government-owned places.
“We’re not going to let them do it without a counterpoint,” Silverman told the Miami Herald. “If we do it without a counterpoint it’s going to appear very strongly that the government actually endorses one religion over another, or — I should say — religion in general over non-religion.”
read more here
Saturday, June 29, 2013
Army combat medic, now double amputee, fights to heal
Pa. soldier is in the fight of his life
By CHRIS ROSENBLUM
The (State College, Pa.)
Centre Daily Times/AP
Published: June 29, 2013
STATE COLLEGE, Pa. — Sgt. Adam Hartswick grimaces. His upper-arm muscles swell as sweat beads on his forehead.
This exercise, he's pressing a lot of weight — his own.
Having inched out of his wheelchair and across a therapy table, he pushes himself up onto a small perch of twin yoga cushions, and straightens his torso.
He's ready for another workout drawing him closer to new legs, ready to squeeze some more strength from his 22-year-old heart.
"There you go, buddy, yeah," his father, Sean Hartwsick, says.
It's Thursday afternoon in the Military Advanced Training Center gym within the vast Walter Reed National Military Medical Center. Everyone who is here, grunting and yelling over the pop and country music in the background, was robbed while in uniform. Their limbs, their past lives, are long gone.
Now, with the help of ace physical therapists and state-of-the-art equipment, they're fighting to regain what explosions and bullets took.
Each person on a mat or machine has a story. Hartswick's began five weeks ago and thousands of miles from his Pine Grove Mills and State College homes.
An Army combat medic, Hartswick lost his legs above the knees and his right index finger to an improvised explosive device on May 14 in Afghanistan. He either stepped on the IED or it was detonated as he and other soldiers came to the aid of an ambushed foot patrol.
read more here
By CHRIS ROSENBLUM
The (State College, Pa.)
Centre Daily Times/AP
Published: June 29, 2013
Morgen Hummel helps her son, Sgt. Adam Hartswick, lay on a table during a physical therapy session at Walter Reed National Military Medical Center in Bethesda, Md. on Thursday, June 20, 2013.
CHRISTOPHER WEDDLE, CENTRE DAILY TIMES/AP
STATE COLLEGE, Pa. — Sgt. Adam Hartswick grimaces. His upper-arm muscles swell as sweat beads on his forehead.
This exercise, he's pressing a lot of weight — his own.
Having inched out of his wheelchair and across a therapy table, he pushes himself up onto a small perch of twin yoga cushions, and straightens his torso.
He's ready for another workout drawing him closer to new legs, ready to squeeze some more strength from his 22-year-old heart.
"There you go, buddy, yeah," his father, Sean Hartwsick, says.
It's Thursday afternoon in the Military Advanced Training Center gym within the vast Walter Reed National Military Medical Center. Everyone who is here, grunting and yelling over the pop and country music in the background, was robbed while in uniform. Their limbs, their past lives, are long gone.
Now, with the help of ace physical therapists and state-of-the-art equipment, they're fighting to regain what explosions and bullets took.
Each person on a mat or machine has a story. Hartswick's began five weeks ago and thousands of miles from his Pine Grove Mills and State College homes.
An Army combat medic, Hartswick lost his legs above the knees and his right index finger to an improvised explosive device on May 14 in Afghanistan. He either stepped on the IED or it was detonated as he and other soldiers came to the aid of an ambushed foot patrol.
read more here
Maine joins other states treating PTSD with Marijuana
Maine approves medical marijuana for PTSD
By William Breathes
in Legislation
Medical, News Thursday
June 27, 2013
Post-traumatic stress disorder isn't just a media buzzword. It's mental and often physical suffering that affects millions of people to varying degrees, often making life unlivable. In recent years, cannabis has been shown - albeit anecdotal - to help improve PTSD symptoms yet many states with medical marijuana laws still don't allow it as a qualifying condition.
As of today, however, there's one less. Maine Gov. Paul LePage signed LD 1062 yesterday, authorizing patients with PTSD to legally access cannabis in that state. Maine joins New Mexico and Oregon in passing MMJ-PTSD legislation this year.
Connecticut, California, Delaware, and Massachusetts also have PTSD provisions in their state laws.
read more here
By William Breathes
in Legislation
Medical, News Thursday
June 27, 2013
Post-traumatic stress disorder isn't just a media buzzword. It's mental and often physical suffering that affects millions of people to varying degrees, often making life unlivable. In recent years, cannabis has been shown - albeit anecdotal - to help improve PTSD symptoms yet many states with medical marijuana laws still don't allow it as a qualifying condition.
As of today, however, there's one less. Maine Gov. Paul LePage signed LD 1062 yesterday, authorizing patients with PTSD to legally access cannabis in that state. Maine joins New Mexico and Oregon in passing MMJ-PTSD legislation this year.
Connecticut, California, Delaware, and Massachusetts also have PTSD provisions in their state laws.
read more here
Wyoming veterans help escort traveling memorial
Wyoming veterans help escort traveling memorial
Ravalli Republic
By CHILTON TIPPIN
June 29, 2013
LARAMIE, Wyo. – Carl Meloche still remembers his worst homecoming.
“I came back from Vietnam in December of ’68,” the Army Special Forces veteran said. “A bunch of us came in and got on the bus at Oakland. We drove through the gate, and there were a bunch of protesters out there, long-haired hippie people, peace signs and all of that.”
He said protesters, chanting and picketing, circled the bus and blocked its passage.
“The bus driver said, ‘We’re going to have to get the MP to clear the road,’” Meloche said.
The Green Berets on the bus had a better idea.
“We unloaded the bus,” Meloche said. “We walked in front and formed a V in front of the bus. And we moved those people, not physically, but mentally. They decided they didn’t want anything to do with the Green Beret, with the veterans who’d just come back from killing hostile enemies over there.”
Earlier this month, Meloche rode as the point man in the motorcade escorting the American Veterans Travelling Tribute into Cheyenne.
The memorial is a wall bearing the names of tens of thousands of veterans who’ve died fighting in every American war since World War II, and it includes every name of the more than 58,000 service members killed during the Vietnam War.
Meloche and fellow Vietnam veteran, Daniel R. Santistevan – both Laramie residents – said riding in the escort’s vanguard brought back memories of the war, faces of fallen friends and the latent fear, frustration and anguish associated with combat.
And both soldiers agreed: The ride was the greatest honor of their lives.
read more here
Ravalli Republic
By CHILTON TIPPIN
June 29, 2013
LARAMIE, Wyo. – Carl Meloche still remembers his worst homecoming.
“I came back from Vietnam in December of ’68,” the Army Special Forces veteran said. “A bunch of us came in and got on the bus at Oakland. We drove through the gate, and there were a bunch of protesters out there, long-haired hippie people, peace signs and all of that.”
He said protesters, chanting and picketing, circled the bus and blocked its passage.
“The bus driver said, ‘We’re going to have to get the MP to clear the road,’” Meloche said.
The Green Berets on the bus had a better idea.
“We unloaded the bus,” Meloche said. “We walked in front and formed a V in front of the bus. And we moved those people, not physically, but mentally. They decided they didn’t want anything to do with the Green Beret, with the veterans who’d just come back from killing hostile enemies over there.”
Earlier this month, Meloche rode as the point man in the motorcade escorting the American Veterans Travelling Tribute into Cheyenne.
The memorial is a wall bearing the names of tens of thousands of veterans who’ve died fighting in every American war since World War II, and it includes every name of the more than 58,000 service members killed during the Vietnam War.
Meloche and fellow Vietnam veteran, Daniel R. Santistevan – both Laramie residents – said riding in the escort’s vanguard brought back memories of the war, faces of fallen friends and the latent fear, frustration and anguish associated with combat.
And both soldiers agreed: The ride was the greatest honor of their lives.
read more here
If you don't know them anymore
If you don't know them anymore
Wounded Times Blog
Kathie Costos
June 29, 2013
If you want to know what it is like inside other families of veterans with PTSD, this song very well could be the best explanation of it. "If you don't know me by now" is sung by Simply Red in this video.
It is not a new song but was done in 1972 by Harold Melvin and the Blue Notes
The beginning of the song is what we went through before my husband was finally getting the help he needed, far beyond what I could give.
As much as I expected him to know me, know what I needed from him, I expected him to know I was not going to leave. He expected the same out of me, but too many times I wasn't sure "who" he was. There were times when the trouble he caused made me forget about how most of the time he made my life so much better. The day we got married I said I was marrying my best friend. A couple of years later, mild PTSD turned into full force and I wasn't sure who he was anymore. I had to remind myself and know him all over again.
I would listen to many songs and remember what it was like. Our wedding song was A One in a Million. Sometime later the song that got to me the most was I can't make you love me even though it came out in 1991, it still gets to me.
Our lives have changed so much since then and we found what works for us. Almost 29 years since I took that walk toward him we're still walking together and holding hands.
If you are married to a veteran with PTSD, take a walk with him back in your own history. Take out old photos of better days before you play this video. Look at the memories you shared and try to remember what he/she was like before the changes started to take over. The person you loved is still there. You just have to look for them in a different way. Look at the pictures while you hear the words and then ask yourself if you want to help them find themselves again or not. They were worth loving then, they are worth loving now.
Wounded Times Blog
Kathie Costos
June 29, 2013
If you want to know what it is like inside other families of veterans with PTSD, this song very well could be the best explanation of it. "If you don't know me by now" is sung by Simply Red in this video.
It is not a new song but was done in 1972 by Harold Melvin and the Blue Notes
The beginning of the song is what we went through before my husband was finally getting the help he needed, far beyond what I could give.
If you don't know me by nowYou will never never never know meAll the things that we've been throughYou should understand me like I understand youNow girl I know the difference between right and wrongI ain't gonna do nothing to break up our happy homeOh don't get so excited when I come home a little late at nightCause we only act like children when we argue fuss and fight
As much as I expected him to know me, know what I needed from him, I expected him to know I was not going to leave. He expected the same out of me, but too many times I wasn't sure "who" he was. There were times when the trouble he caused made me forget about how most of the time he made my life so much better. The day we got married I said I was marrying my best friend. A couple of years later, mild PTSD turned into full force and I wasn't sure who he was anymore. I had to remind myself and know him all over again.
I would listen to many songs and remember what it was like. Our wedding song was A One in a Million. Sometime later the song that got to me the most was I can't make you love me even though it came out in 1991, it still gets to me.
Our lives have changed so much since then and we found what works for us. Almost 29 years since I took that walk toward him we're still walking together and holding hands.
If you are married to a veteran with PTSD, take a walk with him back in your own history. Take out old photos of better days before you play this video. Look at the memories you shared and try to remember what he/she was like before the changes started to take over. The person you loved is still there. You just have to look for them in a different way. Look at the pictures while you hear the words and then ask yourself if you want to help them find themselves again or not. They were worth loving then, they are worth loving now.
Texas Police Officer, Deputy Shot; Suspect Killed
Sad update
AP: Hood County deputy dies of gunshot wound
Weatherford Democrat
By NOMAAN MERCHANT
Associated Press
June 29, 2013
FORT WORTH, Texas (AP) — A Hood County sheriff's deputy died Saturday, a day after being shot by a man who was later killed by police.
Hood County Sheriff's Sgt. Lance McLean died at the John Peter Smith Hospital on Saturday in Fort Worth, Sheriff Roger Deeds said.
McLean was shot in the head by Ricky Don McCommas, 49, when responding to a disturbance call at a home near Granbury about 35 miles southwest of Fort Worth, Texas Department of Public Safety Sgt. Lonny Haschel said Friday.
"Everybody's having a tough time dealing with it," Deeds said. He said McLean was married and had two children.
read more here
Texas Police Officer, Deputy Shot; Suspect Killed
Officer.com
BILL HANNA AND BILL MILLER
SOURCE: FORT WORTH STAR-TELEGRAM
CREATED: JUNE 28, 2013
The suspect reportedly had an assault-style rifle and dozens of shell casings were found at the scene
GRANBURY, Texas -- Two law enforcement officers were wounded and a suspect was fatally shot Friday morning in an incident that ended near Granbury City Hall.
A Hood County Sheriff's deputy was flown to John Peter Smith Hospital in Fort Worth and a Granbury police officer was transported to Texas Health Harris Methodist Hospital Fort Worth. Their conditions were not known.
Details were sketchy, but the incident apparently started during a traffic stop in the Oak Trail Shores trailer park -- just outside of Granbury -- where a deputy was shot, according to the Hood County News.
read more here
Florida family missing at sea
Florida Family and 4 Others Missing at Sea Off New Zealand
New York Times
By GERRY MULLANY
Published: June 28, 2013
HONG KONG — Rescue teams were searching the waters between Australia and New Zealand on Friday for a schooner carrying seven people after their boat went missing in stormy seas.
Three passengers on the boat, the Dyche family from Florida — David A. Dyche, 58; his wife, Rosemary, 60; and their son, David — were on their last sailing trip as a family before David, 17, was to leave for college, according to the Web site of The Australian.
The boat, named Nina, left New Zealand for Australia across the Tasman Sea on May 29, and the crew was last heard from on June 4, when one of the people on board, Evi Nemeth, 73, sent a text message to Bob McDavitt, a meteorologist in New Zealand, saying, “Any update 4 Nina? ... Evi.” The message followed a call from Ms. Nemeth saying, “The weather’s turned nasty, how do we get away from it?”
read more here
New York Times
By GERRY MULLANY
Published: June 28, 2013
HONG KONG — Rescue teams were searching the waters between Australia and New Zealand on Friday for a schooner carrying seven people after their boat went missing in stormy seas.
Three passengers on the boat, the Dyche family from Florida — David A. Dyche, 58; his wife, Rosemary, 60; and their son, David — were on their last sailing trip as a family before David, 17, was to leave for college, according to the Web site of The Australian.
The boat, named Nina, left New Zealand for Australia across the Tasman Sea on May 29, and the crew was last heard from on June 4, when one of the people on board, Evi Nemeth, 73, sent a text message to Bob McDavitt, a meteorologist in New Zealand, saying, “Any update 4 Nina? ... Evi.” The message followed a call from Ms. Nemeth saying, “The weather’s turned nasty, how do we get away from it?”
read more here
PTSD Awareness must include first responders
June is PTSD awareness month
KETK News
Marlena Hamilton
Reporter
June 28, 2013
TYLER TX, (KETK) — June is post-traumatic stress disorder awareness month.
Not only do men and women from war suffer from this disorder, first responders do as well.
"They are dealing with things that aren't natural for human beings," said Smith County Sheriff's Office Chaplain Doug Haning.
Our police officers, firefighters and ems responders are there in times of trouble.
"We go on what we call auto pilot. Sometimes we are able to stay on auto pilot throughout the scene get through it and then it's time to start dealing with it,'' said City of Tyler Asst. Fire Marshal Laura Mason.
But, they experience situations and tragedies that no one can even imagine.
"Law enforcement and military are a lot alike they have the same stresses 99% of the time your dealing with the ins and outs of your daily business and then there is that 1% of the time where everything is upside down," said Haning.
read more here
PTSD I Grieve from Kathleen "Costos" DiCesare on Vimeo.
KETK News
Marlena Hamilton
Reporter
June 28, 2013
TYLER TX, (KETK) — June is post-traumatic stress disorder awareness month.
Not only do men and women from war suffer from this disorder, first responders do as well.
"They are dealing with things that aren't natural for human beings," said Smith County Sheriff's Office Chaplain Doug Haning.
Our police officers, firefighters and ems responders are there in times of trouble.
"We go on what we call auto pilot. Sometimes we are able to stay on auto pilot throughout the scene get through it and then it's time to start dealing with it,'' said City of Tyler Asst. Fire Marshal Laura Mason.
But, they experience situations and tragedies that no one can even imagine.
"Law enforcement and military are a lot alike they have the same stresses 99% of the time your dealing with the ins and outs of your daily business and then there is that 1% of the time where everything is upside down," said Haning.
read more here
PTSD I Grieve from Kathleen "Costos" DiCesare on Vimeo.
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