Why Ask Why and Not Why Not?

Why Not Take Tomorrow Back in Your Hands?
Combat PTSD Wounded Times
Kathie Costos
August 23, 2017

What is worse to you, needing help from someone else, or worrying that they won't help? Oh, it is all so easy to see so many getting help online but, so hard wondering why you are not one of them. Gets pretty lonely, at best, and at worst, robs you of whatever hope you try to hang onto.

We can keep asking "why" something happened, but sooner or later, we've run out of questions before we found a single answer. I know that feeling all too well and right now, I'm in one of those times when the back of my neck hurts from my head being down so low, instead of held up high. 

The weight of the world or something much deeper? I can sit here and feel sorry for myself, asking "why" or I can add in that one extra word that opens the door to possibilities.

Instead of asking "why" add in "not" and see what happens.

I am not a veteran. I am just a human dealing with life and other people as best as I can. You have all the same problems the rest of us do but you also have the extra weight on your shoulders from serving and putting your life on the line.

When you need help, first figure out why you are not asking for it. Is it because of your pride? Nope, since you had no trouble asking for help when your life was on the line along with those you served with. Is it because you've asked before and ended up feeling worse because you were turned down, turned away or put down? So why not ask someone else?

Nothing will ever change until you try to make it happen. If you know your life sucks, then wonder why and then why not do something to make it better?

Life mattered so much to you that you were willing to risk it for others. So why not risk your pride to save your own this time?

Look at your family and the people you think you are making miserable. You must care about them or you wouldn't be thinking of what you're doing to them. Why not think of what you can do for them? Why not think of ways to make your lives better together instead of thinking about something that will cause them to blame themselves for the rest of their lives. Why not give them a chance to help you stay instead of leaving them with that?

Why let what you survived defeat you now? Why not take back control over your life instead? If your pride is stopping you from asking for help, why not think of what it can be like to stand on the other side of this darkness and help someone else get through their own?

"Why be afraid if I'm not alone"

I made Alive Day years ago, and at the end, it says that "18 veterans committed suicide today" but that was what we knew a long time ago. We know better now and now you know better too. The song on the video is "I Will Live For Love" and why not think of your life that way? You were willing to die for those you served with and loved like family. Why not be willing to live for them too?

Fort Hood Soldier's Toughest Battle is Not Born Yet

Fort Hood soldier's baby faces rare health condition
KCEN TV 6 News
Jillian Angeline

CAPT. WILLIAM LEASURE'S WIFE, ELISA LEASURE, WAS AT A ROUTINE SONOGRAM AT 20 WEEKS PREGNANT WHEN SHE HEARD THE NEWS NO PARENT WANTS TO HEAR. "THEY GOT ANOTHER SONOGRAPHER TO COME IN AND THAT’S WHEN I KNEW SOMETHING REALLY WASN’T RIGHT,” LEASURE SAID.

HOUSTON - A Fort Hood soldier returned home early from a deployment in Europe to care for his family. His soon-to-be newborn son is facing an uphill battle.

The soldier's wife, Elisa Leasure, was at a routine sonogram at 20 weeks pregnant when she heard the news no parent wants to hear.

"They got another sonographer to come in and that’s when I knew something really wasn’t right,” Leasure said.

Leasure's son, Billy Jr., was diagnosed with Heterotaxy Syndrome -- a condition which affects 1 in 10,000 births where internal organs are misplaced or duplicated. Heterotaxy means "on the different side".

“My first thought is we have to temper our excitement because I know nothing about this disease and of course one of the first things you’re presented with is hey, you should strongly consider abortion,” Captain William Leasure said.

“Rather than being upset like I was, because I was in tears, I just couldn’t think clearly," Elisa Leasure said. "His first thought was well we’ll research it and you know? Worse case scenario, instead of a football player, I’ll have a fishing buddy.”

Billy’s heart developed on the right side of his body, known as right atrial isomerism.
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Combat Medic Served with Welsh Regiment in Iraq, Faces Judge Over Jelly?

Before you think I've totally lost my mind, read the story and then understand this veteran served as a medic in combat, but couldn't get over jelly even though he was getting help. Just goes to show that not all help is good help if this happened.

Iraq veteran threatened girlfriend with knife in row over jelly

Devon Live
Ted Davenport
August 23, 2017

Former army medic had PTSD when he attacked partner

A judge has showed mercy on a former army medic who attacked his partner while suffering from post-traumatic stress caused by his service in Iraq.

Christopher Minards threatened his girlfriend with a knife and pushed her and her twin sister during a petty argument over spilled jelly.

He had just come home from working a night shift as a hotel porter when he lost his temper and threw a mug at a mirror, breaking both.

His behaviour was so violent that his partner and her twin sister both fled the home in Newton Abbot and waited for police to arrive.

Minards, aged 32, is a former army medic who has been receiving support and treatment from veteran's charities for post traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) dating back to his service with 4th Rifles and the Welsh Regiment in Iraq.
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Vietnam Veteran's Searched The Wall, For More Than Names to Him

Veteran, family look for names of dozens of friends on Moving Wall

By Lydia Goerner
Aug 21, 2017

“I guess my dad is one of the lucky ones because he had a very successful life,” Funfar said. But her father has struggled with PTSD ever since he left Vietnam at age 23. 

“I heard him tell another Vietnam veteran when we were at the wall, ‘Maybe we’re not supposed to forget,’” Funfar said.

Courtesy of: Kristi Funfar Barry Funfar finds the names of the men in his unit on the Moving Wall.

Kristi Funfar gained a better understanding of her dad, Barry Funfar, a Vietnam veteran, when they went to the Moving Wall together, where she learned that 111 people her dad trained with were killed in action in Vietnam.

Barry, a door gunner from 1968 to 1969, went looking for 39 names of the men in his unit who did not come back, but after he visited the wall he recognized a lot of other names. Barry didn’t find all the names of those in his unit because he became “overwhelmed,” Funfar said, but he made rubbings of the men who were his closest friends to send to their families.

“I got choked up just watching how it was for him,” Funfar said. “I don’t really have words to describe how sad.”

Funfar, who lives in Falmouth, said her dad explained that, “he’ll find a name that he remembers and then picture a face and picture moments. They never got to come home and fill their dreams and have a family.”

Barry completed 127 missions as a door gunner, firing weapons while aboard a helicopter. This job was so dangerous that door gunners were read their last rites before they went on a mission.

“He’s never said this, but I think it’s almost a guilty, ‘Why did I get to come home?’ type of thing,” Funfar said.
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Search Suspended for Black Hawk Missing Soldiers

Missing soldiers identified as Coast Guard ends search for Black Hawk crew

By Star-Advertiser staff

August 21, 2017

Coast Guard officials announced today that they are suspending the nearly week-long active search for five Army aviators who went missing Tuesday night when their Black Hawk helicopter crashed into the ocean about 2 miles west off of Kaena Point.

The Army also formally identified the crew members today as:

1st Lt. Kathryn M. Bailey, 26, of Hope Mills, N.C.;

 Chief Warrant Officer 3 Brian M. Woeber, 41, Decatur, Ala.

 Chief Warrant Officer 2 Stephen T. Cantrell, 32, Wichita Falls, Texas

Staff Sgt. Abigail R. Milam, 33, Jenkins, Ky.

 Sgt. Michael L. Nelson, 30, Antioch, Tenn.

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Australia Commander Opens Up About PTSD

Going public: How PTSD broke AFP commander and Australia’s strongest man

News.com
Debbie Schipp
August 21, 2017

AS Australia’s strongest man, former Australian Federal Police Commander Grant Edwards’ physical strength was pure, brutish, inarguable, indisputable power.

So he was as astounded as anyone when he splintered apart mentally.

The unravelling, when it came, left him sobbing uncontrollably. And once the tears started, the flood would not stop. The stone man broke.

Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) was the toll on a man who had been at the forefront of child exploitation and trafficking investigations.

It was 2003, the early days of the spread of internet, and it was grim, sickening, gut-wrenching work.

You didn’t talk about it, he told ABC’s Australian Story in a report on Monday night.

You hardened up. Maybe had a few drinks. And then a lot more. The hangover would mask it.

As AFP Commissioner Andrew Colvin concedes: “You didn’t talk about your weaknesses, you didn’t talk about your vulnerabilities, because that was a sign you weren’t doing your job, you weren’t strong enough or cut out to be a police officer,” Commissioner Colvin said.

Earlier this year, the suicide of an officer at the AFP’s Melbourne headquarters led to a flood of complaints from former and existing AFP officers, chronicled by news.com.au’s Megan Palin.
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VA Says Veterans Sneak Drugs into VA?

Veterans can be ‘diabolical’ while sneaking drugs into VA facilities, official says

The Enterprise

Tom Relihan

August 21, 2017

They’ve found it hidden in patients’ ears, and in the pages of a book.

Following the overdose death of a Saucier, Mississippi, Marine Corps veteran at the Brockton Veteran’s Affairs Medical Center in March, U.S. Congressman Stephen Lynch said hospital administrators have assured him they’ve taken steps to improve security at the Belmont Street facility.

U.S. Rep. Stephen Lynch, D-Mass. Carolyn Kaster AP File

But, the drug that caused the incident, fentanyl, is so potent that lethal doses can be difficult to detect, he said.

Hank Brandon Lee, a retired lance corporal and mortarman in the Marine Corps, traveled from his home in Mississippi to Boston during a black-out period brought on by severe post-traumatic stress disorder in February, according to VA records obtained by The Enterprise. 

He was admitted to the Brockton campus’s psychiatric ward to undergo treatment, but was found unresponsive in early March. He was pronounced dead at Good Samaritan Medical Center, and his autopsy report later revealed the cause of death as acute fentanyl intoxication. 

Exactly how Lee was able to acquire and consume the drug inside the ward is still unclear.read more here

And Then There Were 15 MIssing

Search Expanded for Missing Black Hawk Crew

Big Island Now

August 20, 2017

Responders searched throughout the night Saturday and are continuing the search Sunday, Aug. 20, 2017, for the five Army aviators who went missing Tuesday night approximately two miles west of Ka‘ena Point.

Search and rescue planners have also reached out to the residents of Ni’ihau Island to conduct searches along their shoreline.

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Ten sailors missing after U.S. warship, tanker collide near Singapore
REUTERS

SINGAPORE/WASHINGTON (Reuters) - Ten U.S. sailors were missing after a collision between a destroyer and a tanker near Singapore on Monday, the second involving a U.S. warship and a merchant ship in Asia in about two months, triggering a fleet-wide probe of operations and training.

The guided-missile destroyer John S. McCain and the tanker Alnic MC collided while the warship was heading to Singapore for a routine port call. The collision tore a hole in the warship's waterline, flooding compartments that included a crew sleeping area, the U.S. Navy said.

"Initial reports indicate John S. McCain sustained damage to her port side aft," it said in a statement. "There are currently 10 sailors missing and five injured."

U.S. Defense Secretary James Mattis said Chief of Naval Operations Admiral John Richardson would conduct a broad investigation into U.S. naval operations after the collision.
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Marine Vietnam Veteran Built A Memorial--In His Yard

A special ceremony for Vietnam veterans: Area man built his own museum, war memorial

Bismark Tribune

Nathan Bowe

Forum News Service

August 19, 2017

Howard Maninga stands beside the veterans memorial he built on his property in rural Ponsford. All new flags will be raised at a ceremony open to all Vietnam veterans on Aug. 26. Nathan Bowe, Forum News Service

PONSFORD, Minn. — Fifty years ago, Howard Maninga of rural Ponsford went to fight in Vietnam as a young Marine. He came back, but he brought Vietnam with him.

“I went into Vietnam in ‘67,” says Maninga, now age 69. “When I got home, I couldn’t get married unless my dad signed off on it — I was too young.”

He fought in the battle of Guay, and spent 10½ months in Vietnam, fighting the Viet Cong, North Vietnamese, and at times, the Chinese, he said. Most of the time, he carried the “The Law,” an M79 shoulder-fired grenade launcher.

“We were sent there to kill people, and that’s what we did,” said Maninga, who grew up near the small southeastern Becker County community of Midway and joined the Marines because he “wanted to be a grunt,” he said.

The war was 50 years ago, but he said it has never left him. “You can’t put nothing aside — it keeps coming back, like yesterday,” said Maninga. If not for strong family support, especially from his wife, Trudy, he said he would have been dead long ago.

A member of the Marine Corps League North Star Detachment, Maninga also spends a lot of time performing honor guard duties at the funerals of veterans. “We’ve done 370-some funerals,” he said.
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Vietnam Veteran Memorial “Moving Wall” Reminder of Different Nation

All Vietnam veterans and their families honored at Moving Wall

Wareham Wicked Local
Mary McKenzie
August 20, 2017

“I left Vietnam, but truth be told, it hasn’t left me. A seemingly unrelated sight or sound will bring me right back and then you remember the unexpected explosions, the screams of pain ...” Brig. Gen. James Carpenter

WAREHAM - As Pastor Colon Wright of Emmanuel Assembly of God Church thanked the audience for “honoring our fallen brothers and sisters” by visiting the Vietnam Wall, he asked them to remember those who returned home as well.

That sentiment, honoring the dead but recognizing the sacrifices of those who returned from the war, was echoed several times at Saturday night’s ceremonies at the Vietnam Veteran Memorial “Moving Wall.”

“I still find it difficult to talk about my time in Vietnam,” said Henry Mello, who served in the United States Army during the war and is now secretary of the Taunton Vietnam Veterans Association. “It took me about 50 years to ask for help.”

Brig. Gen. James Carpenter, the former commander of the Hawaii Army National Guard, with his voice breaking, reminded the audience that the night was dedicated to all Vietnam Veterans - those that returned, those that returned with disabling physical or psychological damage, those that returned to a hostile community - everyone.

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