Hope for a kinder, gentler America, do not let it rest

Looking back over the reports from the last few days, it was stunning to see five living presidents, with their wives, gathered together to say farewell to one.

Wonder what they were thinking? Wonder if they thought about their own funerals and what will be said by those who knew them, and what history told us about them?

Somehow, I think that President Bush knew what would be said about him, that in the end, was the most important thing that can be said of anyone. He was a good man!

The following is a great article but I pulled out a couple of things that stood out for me.

 At George H.W. Bush funeral, hope for a kinder, gentler America
Chicago Tribune
Dahleen Glanton
December 5, 2018 

President Donald Trump, from left, first lady Melania Trump, former President Barack Obama and Michelle Obama, former President Bill Clinton, former Secretary of State Hillary Clinton and former President Jimmy Carter and Rosalynn Carter attend the funeral of George H.W. Bush. (Alex Brandon/Getty-AFP)

"At this moment, we are desperately clinging to the promise that America once represented, hoping that somehow we can begin to live up to the greatness the world has come to expect of us and that we once expected of ourselves."

"Meacham called Bush “America’s last great soldier-statesman, a 20th-century founding father.” 

But Bush’s Texas minister, the Rev. Russell Levenson, told us not to consider this the end to an era.“It doesn’t have to be,” he said. “ Perhaps it is an invitation to fill the hole that has been left behind.” 

“My hunch is heaven, as perfect as it must be, just got a bit kinder and gentler,” he said in closing. 

I don’t know about heaven. But maybe America can be."

Have you heard enough excuses for veterans killing themselves yet?

When will the VA and DOD admit the awful truth?

Combat PTSD Wounded Times
Kathie Costos
December 5, 2018

Yet again, a report came out about how bad it is for our veterans when they come home. Younger veterans are committing suicide in higher percentages, but the facts are missing.

The awful truth is they did not just fail this year, or last year, or five years ago, or even a decade ago. They failed for over 4 of them.

Billions spent every year and billions made by businesses and charities making a profit off of suicides. That should have been a clue but contracts continued to be written and paid for, along with funerals.

Police end up having to respond to someone finding a dead body, as well as respond when one of them is in a mental health crisis and someone called to get them help, only to have to draw their weapons against a veteran they came to help. That happened at least every week in 2017.

This year, there were 22 public suicides where veterans ended their private hell while making a point to let people be aware of what they had driven them to that point. Hoping like hell that someone would pay attention and do something before another veteran lost their life to suicide.

They saw more and more kicked out of the military. 2,300,000 at last count, right after more speeches about how the DOD claimed they were ready to help them heal.

Billions spent on "prevention training" that every member of the military had to take, yet every branch, every rank, every sex, every age group, lives though combat but dies afterwards by their own hands.

We see National Guards and Reservists, return home without a clue they can heal, so they lose hope before they even try to take control of their lives again.

How much are we willing to see while so many are oblivious to the charade? What expert has been fired for incompetence? What business has had to pay back the money they made off what they failed to deliver on? What charity has been held accountable for passing a slogan off as anything but something to benefit themselves?

It isn't as if they had no way of knowing.

Here is a direct quote from Wounded Times posted on May 29, 2009 about how it should have been known that if the DOD pushed resilience training, suicides would increase.

If you promote this program the way Battlemind was promoted, count on the numbers of suicides and attempted suicides to go up instead of down. It's just one more deadly mistake after another and just as dangerous as sending them into Iraq without the armor needed to protect them.

Yes, I predicted all this because I paid attention. I read reports and I listened to the veterans. No, I was not foolish enough to think the DOD or any of the "experts" would ever listen to someone like me, so not shocked this was ignored. The shocking thing is, they still have not figured it out!!!

It didn't matter that the experts over at RAND Corp investigated this "training" in 2013 and showed why it would not work. Not bad enough that in 2012, suicides hit over 500, or even bad enough they have remained an average of 500 a year since then. It was not even bad enough for them to grasp the concept these men and women were ready to die to save someone else, but did not seek help to save their own lives.

No, none of it was bad enough and today, we have a report where the VA and the DOD still say they have no clue!

Rising Suicide Rates Among Younger Veterans Trigger Alarm Bells at VA

Military.com
By Richard Sisk
December 4, 2018

Suicide rates among veterans 34 and younger have spiked in the last two years, leading the Department of Veterans Affairs to focus more on the 18-to-34-year-old age group than civilian programs for suicide prevention do, a top VA official said Tuesday.

She said another factor that has emerged in analyzing recent statistics has been the suicide rate among National Guard and Reserve veterans who never deployed to a combat zone.

Nearly four of the 20 veteran suicides a day were among National Guard and Reserve members who may have experienced trauma in national disaster duty, but were never in a combat zone, she added.

The number of suicides by veterans of all generations averages 22 each day. But "when we break down the numbers, the national numbers for veterans suicides, we're seeing an increased rate within 18-to-34-year-olds," said Dr. Keita Franklin, the VA's national director of suicide prevention.read the rest here

The thing to pay close attention to is this part

Franklin, who previously served as the Pentagon's Defense Suicide Prevention Office director, also noted that her civilian counterparts in suicide prevention are not facing the same rates of female suicides. "The fact that the female [veteran] rate is 1.8 times higher than their non-veteran counterpart is something we're concerned about."

I won a damn award back in 2008 for a video I did about National Guards and Reservists trying to deal with PTSD! So, if I knew, then why the hell didn't they know and do something about it? Like maybe what people like me had been doing for decades?

Did anyone ask her about how suicides increased within the military and in the veterans' community and they still do not know why? Did anyone ask how it is that after over a decade of "efforts" by the DOD and the VA, this is the outcome?

Notice the number of veterans living has dropped by over 4 million, but the rate went up? Now consider how many years, how many times we have heard "one too many" and how they were focused on doing something about it.

This is from the DOD up to June of this year.

And it is projected to remain about 500 for this year too when you look at the report, then factor in they have revised the numbers in the latest release.

Did anyone ask how it is there were thousands of "awareness raisers" running around the country collected over a billion per year and the suicides still happen even though the veterans are fully aware of all of it?

It is time for us to demand answers, since Congress won't and reporters will not. How much longer are we going to all all of this to go on? When do we actually stand up and fight for the men and women who fight all of our battles?

I am tired of having to try to explain all of this to families when it is too late to do them any good, and then have some "experts" say they still do not know what the hell to do!!! We've known for over 4 decades! When will they? They won't as long as we just let them get away with saying whatever they want.

HOLD THEM ACCOUNTABLE!

Apple Discount store for us? Santa is that you?

Apple launches dedicated store for military and veterans with discounted iPhones, iPads, and more

9 to 5 Mac
Michael Potuck
Dec. 3rd 2018

Apple has today opened up a new online store for active military personnel and veterans to make purchasing its products at a discount more accessible. Different from its education pricing, eligible military customers will receive 10% off Apple products, and the new discounted pricing even includes iPhones, Apple Watch, accessories, and more.

Apple previously offered active military and veteran discounts in Apple Stores, but didn’t have a dedicated online store. It also mirrored the discounted education pricing, which meant no deals on products like iPhone, Apple Watch, Apple TV, accessories, and much more.

As reported by Steven Aquino, Apple’s new Veterans and Military Store webpage offers 10% off on what looks like all of its products. The new storefront comes just in time for the holiday season.

Apple shared the following statement with Aquino:

At Apple we are deeply grateful to the men and women of our armed forces. We’re proud to offer active military and veterans a new dedicated online store with special pricing as an expression of our gratitude for their brave service.

One great aspect to this military discount is that immediate family members can take advantage of it, proving especially useful for active military who are currently deployed.

The Veterans and Military Purchase Program (“Program”) is a benefit provided by Apple Inc. (“Apple”) to current and Veteran members of the U.S. Military, National Guard and Reserve. The Program is also offered to their immediate family members who also reside in their same household. The Program is intended for personal use only.read more here

Someone tell the DOD and the VA Pastor got hand to grow back...for Vietnam Veteran

The following is from Patheos, an Atheist website. Normally, I'm not really interested in what I end up getting links to involving what goes against what I believe, but at least we do agree on this one! 

It is about a stunt using a "Vietnam veteran" who had his hand magically grow back.

With Awful Re-enactment, Pastor Talks About Witnessing a Missing Hand Grow Back

Recently, John Kilpatrick was a guest on the show. He may be best known to readers of this site for speaking in tongues in church in order to defeat witchcraft. It went viral because of how absurd it was.

I guess Kilpatrick wants something even more embarrassing to top his Google results since he told Roth about a time he watched a real live miracle: He saw a Vietnam veteran’s missing hand grow back during a revival.

The story is told via an incredible reenactment. Seriously, you have to watch this.

Someone needs to alert Walter Reed and the VA so they can get moving on this one and then grow back limbs of all the amputees they have...Good Lord!

After veteran was shot by police, family takes police to court

Family of veteran shot and killed by Eugene Police seeks to take civil case to jury trial

KVAL 13 News
by Alex Hasenstab and KVAL.com Staff December 3, 2018

EUGENE, Ore. - Eugene Police responded to the home of Brian Babb on March 30, 2015, after his counselor called dispatchers and said she was afraid the veteran - suffering from PTSD - was going to harm himself with a firearm.

Forty minutes after police arrived, an officer said Babb pointed a rifle at him.

Eugene Police responded to the home of Brian Babb on March 30, 2015, after his counselor called dispatchers and said she was afraid the veteran - suffering from PTSD - was going to harm himself with a firearm. An officer shot and killed Babb less than an hour later. (SBG/File)

EUGENE, Ore. - Eugene Police responded to the home of Brian Babb on March 30, 2015, after his counselor called dispatchers and said she was afraid the veteran - suffering from PTSD - was going to harm himself with a firearm.

Forty minutes after police arrived, an officer said Babb pointed a rifle at him.

After demanding Babb drop his weapon, the officer fired a fatal shot.

The district attorney determined officers were justified in using deadly force.

Babb's family had a different reaction.

"We knew right away that something was seriously amiss," said Stephanie Babb, Brian's sister.

The family filed a civil suit, seeking monetary damages against the officers involved and the city.
read more here

There has been a lot of great reporting on PTSD over the years. Veterans coming forward, sharing their stories, pieces of their lives to help other veterans falling apart. There has been great reporters taking the time to listen and get it all down so that the stories can be shared with the world.

This is one of them. It was reported back in 2006 and the Boston Globe still has the links working. If you want to know how change the outcome, learn what contributed to all the suffering in the first place. Then help them heal!

The war after the war

Boston Globe
By Thomas Farragher, Globe Staff
October 29, 2006

The squad mates paused for a snapshot before their patrol on the night of the roadside bomb attack in Baghdad. From left to right: Jeremy Regnier, Dustin Jolly, and Andy Wilson.

They were an Army of Three — fun-loving, young, courageous, afraid. And when the bomb went off outside Baghdad, killing New Hampshire's Jeremy Regnier, the survivors of the squad found their lives upended. What they suffer has a name — post-traumatic stress — but a label can't describe it. This is a story of a death and its descendants.

It was circled on his calendar, a day he'd looked forward to for months. But as Andy Wilson stood on the wind-swept airfield and the chartered plane glided out of a leaden Texas sky, he was anything but upbeat.

An unsettling cocktail of emotions swirled inside. The balloons and marching bands, the confetti and welcome-home banners were not for him, though they could have been. Should have been.

As a noncommissioned officer, Wilson had sworn to stick by the men he led in combat, no matter what. And to bring them all home.

But after that night in Baghdad when the bomb went off and his friend and comrade slumped against his shoulder, Wilson's war was over.

He left Iraq on leave in late 2004, his mind and spirit broken, and never returned. Doctor's orders. "It gnaws at me," he said.

Three months later, as the troops he served with stepped off the plane at Fort Hood after a year at war, the emotional torque of it all bore down on him again.

The grapevine had carried the whispers from the war zone: Wilson's lost it. Wilson's a coward. And when some of the returning officers refused his outstretched hand or grabbed it limply with looks of disappointment or disdain, he knew who the whisperers were.

But for now, it didn't matter.

As the troops lined up to return their weapons, their gas masks and the other gadgetry of warfare, Wilson searched the crowd for a single face.

Dustin Jolly was the only other soldier who really knew what happened that night in October 2004 when Jeremy Regnier, the cocksure gunner from Littleton, N.H., died.

Like Wilson, Jolly had felt the blast and seen the unspeakable injury -- and knew how easily that memory reel could unspool.

But unlike Wilson, who sought help and went home, he had bottled up his demons and gone back out on patrol.

And so as Jolly -- near the front of the line -- stepped into view, the reunion sequence was anything but certain. Wilson held his breath.

"I saw him," Wilson said, "and once he gave me that dumb-ass Jolly look, I knew he was OK."

The men hugged and smiled and shook hands. They made promises to drink beer and catch up.

"It made me feel good," Wilson said. "It made me feel proud. It made me still feel loved, I guess."

In the months to come, what the two men shared, the darkness and the love, would come to mean everything.

The war after the war had begun.
read more here

It is a condition with an off-putting, antiseptic name -- post-traumatic stress disorder. It is as old as warfare and as new as yesterday's casualty list. Yet, remarkably little is known of why it afflicts some and exempts others, why its symptoms can be so insidious and so adamant. 

Wilson only knew what he felt -- possessed, immobilized, ashamed. He had left Iraq early, and he believed his superiors now considered him damaged goods. The soldier who ran when others stayed. The commander who swapped places with Regnier minutes before the bomb tore him apart.

"I take nothing away from anybody who has lost limbs -- nothing at all because they deserve more than just a Purple Heart," Wilson would later explain. "Maybe they should come up with something for us crazy guys. I don't know. But we have wounds that we're going to carry with us for the rest of our lives. I sit alone in my house sometimes and I cry like a big baby because of what happened."

read more from Nothing's Wrong With You 

 PART ONE: The war after the war

 PHOTO GALLERY: "Welcome to Hell"

 PART TWO: 'Nothing's wrong with you'

 PHOTO GALLERY: "I should have died."

 PART THREE: A 'select club' struggles on

 AUDIO SLIDESHOW: Isolation, withdrawl, and hope

 PHOTO GALLERY: "A penny for your thoughts"

 PART FOUR: 'I need to blaze my own trail'

 AUDIO SLIDESHOW: In uniform, a sense of family

 PHOTO GALLERY: "The consolation prize"

President Bush "Congratulations on receiving your wings of gold,"

Ailing George H.W. Bush Did a Last 'CAVU' Favor for Pence's Marine Son

Military.com
By Richard Sisk
December 3, 2018

Vice President Mike Pence recalled Monday how he asked a last favor from an ailing George H.W. Bush in August on behalf of his son, Marine 1st Lt. Michael Pence -- never expecting that the former president would be able to comply.

The young Pence had just made his first tailhook carrier landing on the aircraft carrier George H.W. Bush, earning his wings as a Marine pilot. Could the former president please autograph a photo for his son?

Pence said Bush's staff replied that he was no longer signing autographs, so he thought that was the end of it. But within a week, a handwritten letter and a signed photo from Bush arrived.

"Congratulations on receiving your wings of gold," Bush wrote to Pence's son. "Though we have not met, I wish you many days of CAVU ahead" -- a reference to the Navy acronym meaning "Ceiling and Visibility Unlimited" that he adopted as his motto in public service.

Pence told the story upon the arrival of Bush's casket at the Capitol as an example of the former president's basic decency and humility. Even in death, Bush performed another public service in the form of a brief respite from the partisan infighting and mudslinging of the warring factions of the White House and Congress.
read more here

Sully will go to Walter Reed after President Bush's Funeral

"Sully went to work with Bush this summer after former first lady Barbara Bush passed away earlier this year."

Washington (CNN) Sully, a yellow Labrador service dog who worked with late former President George H.W. Bush, is accompanying his master one last time by traveling to Washington with Bush's casket.

In a photo tweeted by Jim McGrath, Bush's spokesman, Sully can be seen sitting directly in front of Bush's casket at a Texas funeral home Monday morning, his head bowed in unison with the Bush family members that surround him.

A highly trained service dog, Sully will now go back into service to help other veterans and is going to Walter Reed National Military Medical Center, former President George W. Bush wrote in an Instagram post.

#TakeBackYourLife and live!

Suicide rate up 33% in less than 20 years, yet funding lags behind other top killers

USA Today
Anne Godlasky and Alia E. Dastagir
Dec. 2, 2018

More than 47,000 Americans killed themselves in 2017, the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention reported Thursday, contributing to an overall decline in U.S. life expectancy. Since 1999, the suicide rate has climbed 33 percent.

Americans are more than twice as likely to die by their own hands, of their own will, than by someone else's. But while homicides spark vigils and protests, entering into headlines, presidential speeches and police budgets, suicides don't. Still shrouded in stigma, many suicides go unacknowledged save for the celebrities – Robin Williams, Kate Spade, Anthony Bourdain – punctuating the unrelenting rise in suicide deaths with a brief public outcry.

And research suggests our ways of living may be partly to blame, in ways that don't bode well for the future read more here

*******

When I wanted to die, there was nothing anyone could say or do to change my mind. Our daughter was only 8 months old. The infection I had after giving birth was killing my body. PTSD was killing everything else. 

I knew what PTSD was and what it was doing to my husband, just as much as I knew what it was all doing to me. Hope evaporated. That is why I can assure you, dear reader, that is the only reason people commit suicide. Hope is destroyed.

I remember the nurse saying that I was fighting for my life, but the truth is, I was praying to die. It was not until I came out of the fever long enough to open my eyes, saw my husband holding our baby daughter, and I knew I did not want to leave her.

I was the only one with the power to find hope again. I thought about everything I had been through, all the times I faced death and all the other times when I thought tomorrow wouldn't be any better. And then, then I knew, that after all I had been through, there was no way I was going to be defeated.

We have become a society where "normal" is what we see on TV. Happiness is great pictures on Facebook with people we know surrounded by other people having fun. Only good news is shared as if no one wants anyone to know what is really "normal" for their own lives. We communicate with text messages instead of talking. 

We do not speak out of fear that someone will jump down our throats and "put us in our place" when we are the only ones who surrender power for them to do that to us.

OK, so, here is the best advice I can give. Be YOU! Be true to who you are inside, to your own thoughts and beliefs. Then be free to take control over your own life. Do not give power of your life to anyone else, especially to people you do not really know.

I do not care what other people think of me, or even if they think of me at all. It is my life and I am the only one with the power to enjoy it! I am old now but there was a time when I was much, much younger, foolish enough to think that my happiness was dependent upon other people. Then maturity came and I knew what I would get out of life depended on what I was willing to give it.

So, if you find that someone is not listening to  you, find someone who will. If you find that you are lonely, find other lonely people. If you think you are not important, become important to yourself.

Be true to who you are and how you are will change, instead of the other way around. Most people get bullied at one time or another, but power comes from knowing they really have no power over you. If they do not care about you, then why the hell should anything they think matter to you? They do not belong in your life, so why put them in a position where they can change your life?

When you hear someone say they are raising awareness about suicides, remember, that only helps them. It does not help those fighting to find hope. Be the hope they need to stay here by letting them know you were hurting too, but kicked the crap out of what did not belong in your life so you could #TakeBackYourLife and live! 

This is also how you communicate

How's your mental health? Ending the suicide epidemic begins by caring for ourselves.

USA Today
Barbara Van Dahlen and Talinda Bennington, Opinion contributors
Dec. 1, 2018

My husband died by suicide, having lost sight of the love available to him. But his death won't be in vain if it changes our culture of mental health.

The number of lives lost to suicide is shocking and the impact on survivors is devastating. Indeed, friends and family of those who take their lives often struggle for years trying to make sense of the loss — sometimes blaming themselves for not saving their loved one.

And the children of those who die by suicide are at increased risk for mental health challenges themselves, given the trauma and confusion they experience when a parent seemingly “chooses” to abandon them.

We tend to accept some suicide as unavoidable and inevitable. Many people believe that mental illness, depression and addiction are conditions that cannot be prevented, addressed or effectively treated. But mental health conditions and substance use disorders can be treated even if we can’t always prevent them. People can — and do — heal, recover and live productive lives despite the challenges. It’s time to normalize the need to care for our mental health. Suicide can be prevented.
read more here

Pete Davidson gets emotional about online bullies, being suicidal

USA TODAY
Anika Reed
Dec. 3, 2018

Pete Davidson took to Instagram to address his online bullies in an emotional post that touched on his borderline personality disorder and suicidal thoughts.

In a statement on the social media platform on Monday, Davidson opened up about what the past nine months have been like for him. During that time, Davidson had a whirlwind romance with pop superstar Ariana Grande that ended with a broken engagement.

"I've kept my mouth shut. Never mentioned any names, never said a word about anyone or anything," Davidson said in the post. "I'm trying to understand how when something happens to a guy the whole entire world just trashes him without any facts or frame of reference. Especially in today's climate where everyone loves to be offended and upset it truly is mind boggling."

The "Saturday Night Live" star said that he wants to bring awareness to borderline personality disorder for people like him "who don't want to be on this earth."

"I've been getting online bullied and in public by people for 9 months," he continued. "I've spoken about BPD and being suicidal publicly only in the hopes that it will help bring awareness and help kids like myself who don't want to be on this earth."

Despite any virtual trolls, Davidson vowed to stay strong.

"I just want you guys to know," Davidson said. "No matter how hard the internet or anyone tries to make me kill myself. I won't. I'm upset I even have to say this. To all those holding me down and seeing this for what it is – I see you and I love you."
read more here

Remote Controlled: Bodyguard and PTSD

Listen: Richard Madden Breaks Down Playing a ‘Bodyguard’ With PTSD

VARITY
By DANIELLE TURCHIANO
HOME TV FEATURES
NOVEMBER 30, 2018

Welcome to “Remote Controlled,” a podcast from Variety featuring the best and brightest in television, both in front of and behind the camera.

Richard Madden photographed exclusively for the Variety Remote Controlled Podcast DAN DOPERALSKI FOR VARIETY

In this week’s episode, “Bodyguard” star Richard Madden sits down with Variety‘s features editor of TV, Danielle Turchiano, to talk about playing a former soldier with PTSD, who is tasked with protecting Britain’s Home Secretary.

“In a lot of movies and television we see PTSD as someone closes a door too loud or a car backfires and our subject suddenly is transported back to Afghanistan in the middle of this fighting and men are dying,” Madden says. “That does happen sometimes for people with PTSD — they have flashbacks like that — but that’s not the only thing that happens.”

Madden shares that he was most interested in bringing to life the daily struggle of someone in that position — the anxiety and depression that comes with the disorder.
read more here