Haven't got time for the pain of PTSD

Haven't got time for the pain of PTSD

by
Chaplain Kathie

When soldiers first realize they cannot pass off the pain anymore, ignore the nightmares and flashbacks, control their anger and "get back to the way they were before" the battle to heal just begins. They spend weeks, months, even years trying to get over it and be themselves again. The problem is they don't want to understand that this will never happen. It is an unrealistic goal. The good news is that because they survived the kind of traumatic events combat offers, they can end up being better than before with the right kind of help to heal.

If they understand why they are suffering and know what PTSD is, then they regard anyone standing in the way of their healing as ignorant jerks without a clue. Much as illnesses were regarded as a judgement from God in Biblical days, people blamed the person for being ill. Now many illnesses are being treated so that the person survives. These illnesses cannot be seen with human eyes because they are inside of the body but the affects of them can be seen in the changes of how the person acts. This we are all able to understand but when it comes to PTSD too many still dismiss it and blame the person. Most of the time the people blaming the ill, the wounded, never understand that it very well could happen to them or someone they love.

Post Traumatic Stress Disorder comes after surviving traumatic events. That is the only way to have it change a person's life. It strikes from an outside force by man or nature. One event piles onto others, digs deeper into the soul and changes the way the person sees the world as well as themselves. The survivor changes in response to these events. Some become what they see as "stronger" but when there is an underlying condition what really happens is they become emotionally colder, meaner, angrier than they had been. There is a saying that no one leaves combat the same way and this is very true because every event in a human's life changes them. If the soldier happens to be a compassionate person, the events touch them deeply and they walk away with their own pain plus the pain of others added to their burden.

While there are other causes for PTSD to strike, combat and law enforcement are different in that the person with PTSD has been exposed to events multiple times as well as the fact they have been participants in the events. They put their lives on the line doing their jobs and sometimes they have to either take a life to the job or they witness someone else taking a life. For most other people, they are more victim of events instead of part of them. Firefighters and emergency responders also face multiple events but they do not have to face taking a life to save lives. National Guardsmen and Reservists deployed into combat usually end up with dangerous jobs back home in police and fire departments after being deployed into combat. Just as there are different causes for PTSD, there are different types of it. We cannot treat all of them the same way.

When the soldier gets past wondering what's wrong, past the ignorant standing in the way of healing, find the help they need, they move from existing in a life filled with pain into one of living a life with hope, joys and love. They make peace with the parts of their lives that will not "return to normal" as they are strengthened by the understanding few others have been where they were, did what they did and ended up standing on the other side. The men and woman recovering from PTSD end up helping others get to where they are by offering support as well as inspiration. They don't have time to let the pain get the best of them once they begin to heal because they have taken that same compassion and put it to use to help others.

Haven't Got Time For the Pain

(Carly Simon/Jacob Brackman)

All those crazy nights when I cried myself to sleep
Now melodrama never makes me weep anymore
'Cause I haven't got time for the pain
I haven't got room for the pain
I haven't the need for the pain
Not since I've known you

You showed me how, how to leave myself behind
How to turn down the noise in my mind
Now I haven't got time for the pain
I haven't got room for the pain
I haven't the need for the pain
Not since I've known you

Suffering was the only thing that made me feel I was alive
Thought that's just how much it cost to survive in this world
'Til you showed me how, how to fill my heart with love
How to open up and drink in all that white LIGHT
Pouring down from the heaven
I haven't got time for the pain
I haven't got room for the pain
I haven't the need for the pain
Not since I've known you

When the people in their lives understand what PTSD is, we can help them heal faster and stronger than if we don't understand, react badly or if we walk away. Standing by their side helps them to see they are worthy, see the best of themselves through our eyes and know there is hope of living a better life. We can help them find their own kind of a "new normal" and find peace enough to rejoice.