Growing up in mental health crisis

Meeting youth mental health needs remains a priority – and challenge – for NH providers

New Hampshire Public Radio
By Paul Cuno-Booth
Published July 10, 2023

Sen. Maggie Hassan and Loreley Godfrey, a Portsmouth resident, and advocate, during a roundtable discussion on youth mental health Monday in Manchester.

Mental health services for children and teens continue to be a pressing need in New Hampshire in the wake of the pandemic, according to providers and advocates who spoke at a roundtable in Manchester Monday.

Depression and anxiety among youth rose during the pandemic, and services have struggled to keep up.

“We have some young adults here that have spent their entire high school in this traumatic situation – addiction crisis, layered with COVID, layered with mental health,” said Mary Forsythe-Taber, the executive director of Makin’ It Happens, a youth-focused organization in the greater Manchester area.

The speakers – who included advocates, representatives of mental health providers, and the head of the state’s behavioral health division – described various ways they’re trying to meet that need, supported by recent infusions of federal funding.

That includes planned investments in community mental health, efforts to better integrate mental health services in schools, and a new University of New Hampshire graduate program that aims to train school social workers.

But high demand and shortages of staff continue to leave some families waiting months for services. The Mental Health Center of Greater Manchester is booking some intakes six months out and has about 350 families on the waitlist, according to Director of Child and Adolescent Services Jeanna Still.
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I am a senior citizen. Growing old wasn't easy, but I still remember that growing up wasn't easy either. At least when I was young, we didn't have cell phones, social media, or videos to deal with. We did have bullies, and pressures from other kids, and from our parents. 

The best advice I can give you is first to know yourself. Who are you, what do you want, what do you love and what do you love to do? Be a best friend to yourself first so that you can cope with the world around you a little bit better. 

I know I had to. It wasn't easy and it took a lot of time. The thing is, it was worth it because no matter where you live, who you are with, or what you're doing, you will always be your best friend to yourself. 

Find some help here

Children, youth, and families in need of crisis care have many ways to get the help they need. This page is a guide on what types of care they can get during a crisis. What is a crisis? Any time a child, youth, or family cannot handle a mental, emotional, or substance problem. What that looks like for you will be different than someone else. You get to decide if you need help. 

New Hampshire's Rapid Response
24-hour services are available by for any child, youth, or family in crisis 1 (833) 710-6477. NHRR has people who can talk, chat or text with anyone and/or can send a Rapid Response Team to meet in person.

13th Minister Of Salem "accomplished paranormal chiller to devour."

There are many goals authors have when they write a book. By the time we're finished, we hope we achieved everything we intended to do. When the 13th Minister Of Salem was finished, I was satisfied with the results. I hoped someone else would feel the same way. After all, it's a big book with 328 pages.

I wanted to tell stories we all know differently to, not only change the conversation but to help people see how much power they have within themself to make a difference. That put the 13th Minister Of Salem into what publishers consider a genre-bender.

genre-bending (uncountable) The subversion of tropes associated with a particular artistic genre or the synthesis of multiple genres.

I always viewed myself as a heretic while my older brother called me a witch. There is an ongoing joke in my family centered on this including being given a baby broom in the crib. When our daughter was little and we were taking a trip to Salem, she said we were going to visit my relatives. I had to remind her that if they were mine, then they were hers too. 

Salem has always been close to my heart and so was my spiritual connection to God. I viewed the history of the witch accusations in a different way from the rest of my family. I couldn't just look at all the horror inflicted upon innocent people. I had to see past the suffering to consider what happened when people stood up against the mob rule and put the trials to an end. That was a goal I had to achieve.

I attended the church my family went to, but I reached out to God more often on my own. Yes, I am Christian, because I do believe Jesus was and is the Son Of God. I do not agree with the division of what He started with all the manmade rules. Churchgoers tend to see their chosen affiliation as the only right one. All that is fine because God gave all of us free will to make our own choices. 

In the process of all this, I read the Bible on my own and found it filled with love, power, and many things I never heard preached in church. Sharing what is there few have heard was another goal I wanted to accomplish.

There were several others along with wanting to expand the target audience, but not the reason you may be expecting. I wanted to reach more people to let them know something else that society has gotten wrong. The survivors of events causing PTSD are not what they think they are. They are not all veterans. They are not someone to feel sorry for. They don't have to feel helpless or hopeless. They are not weak. They are not defective or any other label they have been given especially the victim label. They, including me, are survivors!

Considering the review I received from Readers' Favorite, I achieved what I set out to do. I cried when I read it because I also achieved more than I hoped for!

Marketability: 5

Marketability refers to how effectively you wrote your book for your target audience. Authors may include content that is above or below the understanding of their target reader, or include concepts, opinions, or language that can accidentally confuse or alienate some readers. Although by its nature this rating is very subjective, a very low rating here and poor reviews may indicate an issue with your book in this area.

Overall Opinion: 5

The overall starred rating takes into account all these elements and describes the overall reading experience of your reviewer. This is the official Readers' Favorite review rating for your book.

Reviewed by K.C. Finn for Readers' Favorite 5-stars

"I recommend 13th Minister Of Salem to fans of the existing series as another accomplished paranormal chiller to devour."

Penned by Kathie Costos, 13th Minister Of Salem is a work in the supernatural horror, suspense, and gothic drama subgenres, forming the third installment in the Ministers Of The Mystery series. It is best suited to mature adult readers owing to its dark content and adult situations. In this profoundly intriguing continuation of the series, we find ourselves back with Chris as word of his achievements and talents has spread, but this only leads to more trouble for our hero. Trying to get married would be hard enough without the constant death threats from the cult of the now-defeated Haman Cain, let alone the Master’s warning that his end-time is drawing near.

Kathie Costos brings us back into the world of gothic suspense, deep drama, and a chilling thriller with a bang in this third installment in the series. 

I found myself deeply involved in Chris’s psychological storyline. We see the painfully realistic damage that his adventures, battles, and triumphs have left him with over the events of the first two novels. 

I felt his pain, isolation, and pressure deep in my soul; such is the efficacy of Costos’s intimate narrative, thought, and speech portrayal. 

The darkest elements of the work are also well-handled to avoid being gratuitous but remain chilling to the core. I recommend 13th Minister Of Salem to fans of the existing series as another accomplished paranormal chiller to devour.

Discover more here 

If you have PTSD, Annie Kuster along with others, are on your side

Wounded Times
Kathie Costos
July 23, 2022

When you have PTSD and discover others have it too, while you may be sorry they are a member of this club because of the price they paid to join it, it is helpful to know they understand you. The causes may be different but what it does strikes about a third of survivors. This is why peer support matters. That is what members of the House and Senate discovered after the Capitol was attacked on January 6, 2021.

Annie Kuster, along with other members, has been trying to do something about making life better for those with PTSD. She understands it and has not been ashamed to talk about what she survived. She has also been very vocal about how important getting help and support is.

Get yourself a tight-knit group of female friends, Kuster says 

She has been speaking out on PTSD for a long time.

U.S. Rep. Annie Kuster kept silent about the sexual assaults she had endured as a young woman for nearly 40 years. Concord Monitor On Tuesday night, the 59-year-old congresswoman from Hopkinton broke her silence to her husband, family and the world. Her hands clasped on the lectern on the House floor, Kuster launched into a speech detailing one of her most painful memories.

Kuster, along with other members of Congress, are talking about their struggles as well.
ABC 9 News

WASHINGTON (AP) — Long after most other lawmakers had been rushed to safety, they were on the hard marble floor, ducking for cover.

Trapped in the gallery of the House, occupying balcony seats off-limits to the public because of COVID-19, roughly three dozen House Democrats were the last ones to leave the chamber on Jan. 6, bearing witness as the certification of a presidential election gave way to a violent insurrection.

As danger neared, and as the rioters were trying to break down the doors, they called their families. They scrambled for makeshift weapons and mentally prepared themselves to fight. Many thought they might die.

“When I looked up, I had this realization that we were trapped,” said Rep. Jason Crow, D-Colo., a former Army Ranger who served three tours of duty in Iraq and Afghanistan. “They had evacuated the House floor first. And they forgot about us.”

Bound together by circumstance, sharing a trauma uniquely their own, the lawmakers were both the witnesses and the victims of an unprecedented assault on American democracy. Along with a small number of staffers and members of the media, they remained in the chamber as Capitol Police strained to hold back the surging, shouting mob of supporters of then-President Donald Trump.

Kuster, D-N.H., was one of the first to be let out of the gallery on Jan. 6, escaping through the doors along with three other members just before the remaining lawmakers were locked inside. When Kuster’s group reached the hallway, a group of rioters was rushing toward them.

“We ducked into the elevator,” Kuster said. “And I said to this incredible policeman — I said, oh, my God, what if the elevator doors open, and they kill us? And I will never forget this moment ... he said, ‘Ma’am, I am here to protect you.’ And he was there to protect our democracy.”

NH Congresswoman reacts to January 6 primetime hearing

Jul 22, 2022

Rep. Annie Kuster says she believes the select committee hearings are changing the minds of many Americans

While some people may think this is not a big deal, the truth is, it is a huge one. So many lawmakers have been dealing with PTSD in their own lives and they understand all of us now. Maybe, just maybe, they'll push legislation through to address the help all of us need to heal. I know from where I sit, that it is hopeful to know, that people with the power to make our lives better know exactly what we're going through and what got them through their own battles.

5 Marines killed in California Osprey crash identified include one from New Hampshire

Military Times
Andrea Scott
June 11, 2022

A Marine assigned to Marine Wing Support Squadron 371 (MWSS-371) provides security as a MV-22B Osprey sits on the landing strip at AUX II, one of the training ranges that belongs to Marine Corps Air Station Yuma, Arizona, Jan. 22, 2019. (Marine Corps)

Now, 24 hours after next-of-kin notification, the Marine Corps has identified the Marines ― all assigned to Marine Medium Tiltrotor (VMM) Squadron 364, Marine Aircraft Group 39, 3rd Marine Aircraft Wing.

They were based in Camp Pendleton, California, the Marine Corps said in a Friday statement.

Cpl. Nathan E. Carlson, 21, of Winnebago, Illinois, was a tilt-rotor crew chief.

Capt. Nicholas P. Losapio, 31, of Rockingham, New Hampshire, was an MV-22B pilot.

Cpl. Seth D. Rasmuson, 21, of Johnson, Wyoming, was a tilt-rotor crew chief.

Capt. John J. Sax, 33, of Placer, California, was an MV-22B pilot.

Lance Cpl. Evan A. Strickland, 19, of Valencia, New Mexico, a tilt-rotor crew chief.

read more here

The Lost Son and Me

Wounded Times

Kathie Costos

February 23, 2022

When I created this image of me, I was trying for something that looked more like an elf. It didn't work but I got a big kick out of it and decided to keep it. It made the point I was trying to make, that although my wrinkles, scars on my face, bags under my eyes and graying hair, make me appear to be mean, I am far from it. The thing is, people who know me, know what I am all about, and know my character, don't need convincing about that. Only strangers do.

When I wrote The Lost Son, people in my life saw parts of me in the main character. Christopher Papadopoulos is mostly the male version of me.

The scars on his body were reminders of what he survived but the scars in his soul were reminders of why he didn’t want to anymore. Chris Papadopoulos was tired of waiting for his life to get better while he grew more bitter. Tired of paying the price for covering suffering while working as a report for an LA newspaper. Tired of the seven years he survived the bomb blast that ripped through his body while covering the war in Afghanistan. Tired of watching all he had erode like the fire escape from his window.

Seven years was long enough. He sat on his bed with a gun in his hand while a war between hope and despair kept him from lifting the gun to his head. He gave up and went to the bar figuring that if he got drunk enough, he wouldn’t have to think about anything much longer.

Chris thought everyone he knew burned down the bridges between them and him. He couldn’t see he was the one with all the matches and his friends were trying to find the firehose. Chris was dismissing the fact he had PTSD. He was right about one thing. Seven years was too long for him to be suffering instead of healing, but God had other plans for him. That night, Chris was sent on a mission to save himself and millions of others when he discovered a secretive society changing the world one soul at a time.

This is for the "churchless" children of God so you will know, that miracles do not come from a church, but they come from God.

Like Chris, I survived an attempted murder when my first husband came home from work one night and decided to beat me. He almost killed me. He stalked me, just like Chris's wife did to him.

Chris wanted to become a Priest in the Greek Orthodox church, so did I but, as a female, that was never going to happen. Later in life I was told I missed my calling and should have converted to another denomination they would let me preach. I became a Chaplain instead. My church does not support women in ministry, so I felt as if there is no place for me there.

Chris didn't know he had #PTSD and thought he would just get over it. I thought the same thing too. After all, I had devoted 40 years of research, writing and helping other people discover how much power they did have and nothing to be ashamed of as survivors of whatever caused it. The problem is, just like Chris, I turned it into a contest that I didn't want to win. So many others over the years, had it a lot worse than I had it. My panic attacks, mood swings, flashbacks and nightmares, only came to life when I heard the sound of a muscle car, because that was what my ex-husband drove. 

Like Chris never read anything about someone like himself, I never read anything about anyone like me. I survived over 10 events beginning at the age of 5. I saw two therapists and neither of them diagnosed PTSD. I dismissed what I was going through because it didn't happen all the time and did not rob me of a good, happy life.

Chris wanted to become a reporter. I always wanted to be a writer. When Chris started to heal he began to write a book to help others heal too. He wanted them to be able to read about people just like them so they would know they were not alone and their lives could be better. I wanted the same thing and tried through three other books, over 700 videos and countless articles on this site, as well as others. I wanted to tell the truth as much as I wanted to offer hope.

Chris spent 7 years regretting he survived because he thought everyone he knew walked away from him and God sent the suffering to him. On September 13, 2019, seven years after a bomb blast changed his life and caused the nightmarish series of events, he decided his suffering should end. So did God, but God disagreed on how that should happen.

In 13 days, he was led out of the darkness he had been living with, to enlighten the world of what was possible when miracles walk in the door, when he least expected them. Within 6 months, he wrote a book about miracles workers in a secret society of Chaplains and a miracle worker named Mandy living in a cabin in Gabriel New Hampshire. As for me, I wrote 3 books in 6 months because I prayed for a new way to say what I've been saying for 40 years. No one should choose to stay in darkness when the road has been cleared to make it into the light of God's love, even without a church.

Most of the people I helped all these years, believe in God and Jesus, but no longer felt they belonged in a church where they would be accepted. These books are for people like me. It is important that they see what is in the Bible and the beauty of it without feeling as if someone wants to beat them over the head with the Bible they refuse to read, instead of emulating what Jesus said His followers should actually be.

The books are on Amazon, Kindle and Paperback

'True Definition of Soulmates'

Married Couple of 44 Years Dies of COVID While Holding Hands: ​​'True Definition of Soulmates'

William and Carol Stewart of New Hampshire died of COVID-19 within moments of each other

People
By Jason Duaine Hahn
January 05, 2022

A couple from New Hampshire who contracted COVID-19 during the holidays died within moments of each other while holding hands.

According to a GoFundMe set up by their family, William and Carol Stewart died on Dec. 30 after a battle with COVID-19 that "took a turn for the worse" while the couple was hospitalized at Parkland Medical Center.

"Bill and Carol peacefully passed away hand in hand with their loved ones bedside," their nephew, Tim Stewart, wrote on the campaign page. "They fought a long and hard battle with covid, both intubated and on life support."

"I truly believe that the power of prayers and all the kind words that have been shared over the past few weeks is what kept them fighting," he added. "It also kept us hopeful for the best. We sincerely thank you all from the bottom of our hearts. We never really have enough time with our loved ones."

Eight members of the family tested positive for COVID-19, Noke said, and her parents were unvaccinated against the virus. She hopes people who haven't received the shots yet do so.
read more here

I wrote about something like this happening in the second part of The Lost Son. The difference was the couple were vaccinated but too many others around them were not. This is from Alive Again by Kathie Costos published on Amazon November 15, 2021

Can I see the future? No. I see what is happening. I see how good people believe liars and rumors more willingly than they see the truth and facts. What I see more is how too many think that God has turned away from them.

I see churches, houses of worship, turn from what scriptures they speak, yet do not practice. I see too many people being turned away from those buildings advertised as God's House, while ignoring the place where God lives within each of us. Too many value the rich and ignore the needy. They condemn the sinner while committing their own sins and justify themselves by saying they not as bad as those they condemn. I see too many fail to search their bibles for what is true as much as they fail to search their own souls to know why they cannot hear God's voice.

But more so, I see miracles happen all around us that prove God's love is alive and competes us to act out of love as well as spread hope to this troubled world.

1 Corinthians 13 New International Version
13 If I speak in the tongues of men or of angels, but do not have love, I am only a resounding gong or a clanging cymbal.

 

2 If I have the gift of prophecy and can fathom all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have a faith that can move mountains, but do not have love, I am nothing.

 

3 If I give all I possess to the poor and give over my body to hardship that I may boast, but do not have love, I gain nothing.

4 Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud.

 

5 It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs.

 

6 Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth.

 

7 It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.

8 Love never fails. But where there are prophecies, they will cease; where there are tongues, they will be stilled; where there is knowledge, it will pass away.

 

9 For we know in part and we prophesy in part,

 

10 but when completeness comes, what is in part disappears.

 

11 When I was a child, I talked like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child. When I became a man, I put the ways of childhood behind me.

 

12 For now we see only a reflection as in a mirror; then we shall see face to face. Now I know in part; then I shall know fully, even as I am fully known.

13 And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love.

Mental Health Crisis calls cannot be solved with bullets

Wounded Times

Kathie Costos

December 23, 2021

Why is it that people have no problem selecting someone to blame instead of knowing what is actually responsible? Mental Health Crisis calls cannot be solved with bullets.

Over and over again, we read news reports about police officers shooting someone after receiving a mental health crisis call. What we don't read is what comes afterwards. What happened to the family of the person in crisis? What happened to the officers responding?

The Concord Monitor just told the story of Meredith New Hampshire police officer Kevin O’Reilly after he received a call to respond to a man in crisis. The man was not a stranger to officer O'Reilly. He had responded because of the man "several times" before.

The article stated, "In New Hampshire, more than 60 percent of the people killed by police in the last decade struggled with mental illness, according to a Monitor analysis based on 10 years and more than 30 Attorney General reports."

 

Police are tasked with responding to mental crises. The results can be disastrous for officers and callers alike.

Concord Monitor
By TEDDY ROSENBLUTH
December 23, 2021

In New Hampshire, police officers, often not sufficiently trained on the intricacies of handling mental illness, are likely the first — and sometimes the only — response to those in a psychiatric crisis.

Last summer, Kevin O’Reilly sat around the Meredith police station with other officers and talked about a trend they noticed on the local news.

Stories of police shootings, specifically those that involved someone in a mental health crisis, seemed to pop onto the television every couple of months.

They listed off the recent ones: there was the middle-aged man shot in Belmont, about 16 miles south, whose parents said had been in and out of the psychiatric hospital for PTSD and bipolar disorder. About a year later, a 37-year-old man, who family members said struggled with delusions and paranoia for most of his adult life, was shot while running naked at a Thornton police officer about 20 miles to the north.

Every year, it seemed like more and more of O’Reilly’s job was consumed by mental illness. He estimated that on a typical night, three-quarters of his calls were to help someone in crisis.

“We’re not equipped or fully trained to deal with that,” he said. “We do our best: we try to talk softer and slower, bring them down. But we didn’t go to school for that.”
read more here

Sometimes the person has no one trying to help them. Others have family members facing their own turmoil, knowing someone they love needs help, but for whatever reason, the help they receive is not enough. Either way, families have to deal with the results and most of the time, they are unable to make peace with the fact they did the best they could with what they were not equipped to deal with.

For the officers involved, they may be able to come to terms with having to shoot a criminal easier than they can rationalize having to shoot someone who is only dangerous because their minds are sending them into the crisis the police had to respond to.

How many times does this have to happen before this nation actually comes to the conclusion that we have a mental health crisis in this country? January 9, 2020

Police officers opened fire on the man who was armed with a knife at about 10:22 p.m. at the Veterans Affairs Hospital at 4500 S. Lancaster Road. The man was at the hospital seeking psychiatric help, police said. At some point during the interaction, the man started to walk off and the VA officers followed him and tried to disarm him, according to the VA police. Their attempts to disarm him were unsuccessful and two officers opened fire, police said.

The worst thing of all is, police departments across the country are not taking mental health seriously in their communities or in the force itself. How do they expect officers trained to respond to criminals, suddenly become able to respond to people in crisis, when they cannot even respond to officers in crisis because of the jobs they do?

The only way is remember who is responsible for what. Officers are not trained to for mental health emergencies, anymore than psychologists are trained to deal with criminals. Knowing the limitations on humans will go a long way to changing the outcome.

determined to build a new life for himself and stay positive

'I don't know why anybody would be a police officer, you get a target on your back'

Rochester Voice
Harrison Thorp
December 11, 2021

"What really irks me is some people are so quick to place judgment and write negative shit. And then when they're cleared, there's no media coverage. I went through two years of being guilty before proven innocent, which is different than any other person out there." Michael McNeil Jr

Michael McNeil Jr. said he's learned a lot about people and the press during those worst two years of his life.

(Courtesy photo)

A former Rochester man and 20-year Northern Seacoast lawman accused of felony criminal threatening in 2019 said on Wednesday he lost his career in law enforcement "over lies," but is determined to build a new life for himself and stay positive.

Still, it's not easy.

"All this was over selfish lies," Michael McNeil Jr., 41, told The Rochester Voice on Wednesday. "What I went through was horrible. Every time I Google my name and see this stuff, it's heartbreaking."

"The support I've had from people I used to serve have expressed their support for me," he said. "They knew from the beginning this was all a lie. I've had such an outpouring from who I served in towns who reached out on Facebook to show their support. That helped me get through the hard times, the two years I had to go through. They would say. 'We thought you were the best, you cared about people.'"

read more here

New Books To Help Churchless Children Of God Heal PTSD

Wounded Times
Kathie Costos
November 17, 2021 

By the summer, it was getting more and more difficult to find anything new to say about #PTSD. After all, next year will be 40 years after I started. I was feeling pretty hopeless about helping anyone new, especially when the increase of people suffering showed no signs of going down. I mean, there is only so much a person can do. I needed a miracle to be able to say what needed to be said in a new way. 

The books I wrote are for other "churchless" children of God, like me. I don't go to church anymore, so I couldn't go into any kind of building, other than my own home. Considering that Jesus didn't have a church, early Christian prayed outside or in their own homes, I knew God could hear me no matter where I was, with them as examples. I prayed for a way to do it and put it into God's hands.

What came next was the story of The Lost Son based on the Parable.

The Parable of the Lost Son

11 Jesus continued: “There was a man who had two sons. 12 The younger one said to his father, ‘Father, give me my share of the estate.’ So he divided his property between them.
13 “Not long after that, the younger son got together all he had, set off for a distant country and there squandered his wealth in wild living. 14 After he had spent everything, there was a severe famine in that whole country, and he began to be in need. 15 So he went and hired himself out to a citizen of that country, who sent him to his fields to feed pigs. 16 He longed to fill his stomach with the pods that the pigs were eating, but no one gave him anything.
17 “When he came to his senses, he said, ‘How many of my father’s hired servants have food to spare, and here I am starving to death! 18 I will set out and go back to my father and say to him: Father, I have sinned against heaven and against you. 19 I am no longer worthy to be called your son; make me like one of your hired servants.’ 20 So he got up and went to his father.
“But while he was still a long way off, his father saw him and was filled with compassion for him; he ran to his son, threw his arms around him and kissed him.
21 “The son said to him, ‘Father, I have sinned against heaven and against you. I am no longer worthy to be called your son.’
22 “But the father said to his servants, ‘Quick! Bring the best robe and put it on him. Put a ring on his finger and sandals on his feet. 23 Bring the fattened calf and kill it. Let’s have a feast and celebrate. 24 For this son of mine was dead and is alive again; he was lost and is found.’ So they began to celebrate.
25 “Meanwhile, the older son was in the field. When he came near the house, he heard music and dancing. 26 So he called one of the servants and asked him what was going on. 27 ‘Your brother has come,’ he replied, ‘and your father has killed the fattened calf because he has him back safe and sound.’
28 “The older brother became angry and refused to go in. So his father went out and pleaded with him. 29 But he answered his father, ‘Look! All these years I’ve been slaving for you and never disobeyed your orders. Yet you never gave me even a young goat so I could celebrate with my friends. 30 But when this son of yours who has squandered your property with prostitutes comes home, you kill the fattened calf for him!’
31 “‘My son,’ the father said, ‘you are always with me, and everything I have is yours. 32 But we had to celebrate and be glad, because this brother of yours was dead and is alive again; he was lost and is found.’”

When we survive the events that cause Post Traumatic Stress Disorder, no matter what caused it, we often turn away from God. When you live your life trying to do the right thing, for the right reason, and end up subjected to what happened, it is human nature to wonder why it happened to you. I know I did, each and every time. There were ten of them for me. The thing that made surviving them different for me, was while I lost faith in myself, I didn't lose it when it came to God.

That faith helped heal me but it did not mean I was totally resilient. I had a rare form of it that was linked to my ex-husband. I suffered for decades until I found out he passed away and couldn't hurt me anymore. The only thing I had to fear was the dark side trying to pull me back in and stop me from walking in the light of God's love.

As I said, I prayed for a new way to say something that wasn't new. I thought I'd be writing one book but God had other plans for me too and gave me two books to write at the same time. 

Having faith in God and Jesus, does not mean we have to be perfect. The Lost Son and Alive Again are written in the language we all use as adults. In other words, there is swearing going on. They involved adult situations, including drinking alcohol and using drugs to stop feeling anything. The list of causes covers most of them. By the end of both books, God's love won!

The Lost Son begins on September 13, 2019 and ends in 2020. Alive Again begins on September 13, 2021. The events are in Salem, MA and fictional town of Gabriel, New Hampshire. The number 13 plays an important part of both books but you'll have to read them to discover why that is. 

Rep. Chris Pappas wants answers on why providers are not being paid for taking care of veterans

As VA works through backlog, NH providers waiting for $134M

New Hampshire Union Leader
By Josie Albertson-Grove
Feb 23, 2020

Rep. Chris Pappas (D-NH) has been working on the issue as chair of the Oversight and Investigations Subcommittee of the House Committee on Veterans’ Affairs. The committee held a hearing on the reimbursement issue on Feb. 12, and Pappas met with Forrest and local providers in Manchester last Thursday.

Manchester Veterans Affairs Medical Center
New Hampshire Union Leader file photo

MANCHESTER — The VA still owes New Hampshire health care providers an estimated $134 million, as the administration digs out from a backlog of claims.

Kevin Forrest, interim director of the Department of Veterans Affairs Manchester Medical Center, said the delayed payments dated back to a contractor who used to administer the VA Community Care Network program.

The network lets veterans use their VA insurance to pay for treatment outside VA hospitals — from other hospitals and small providers like home health aides, therapists and acupuncturists.

Providers complained of widespread delays and errors in payments last year, and the VA brought in a new contractor to process those claims. But the administration is still working through the nationwide payment backlog.

In the two years since Kathy Twombly’s Laconia acupuncture business has been part of the network, she said the VA has at times left her waiting for as much as $10,000. To make matters worse, the VA has switched contractors three times in two years, she said, meaning the way she files claims keeps changing.
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Capt. Ryan S. Phaneuf of Hudson, New Hampshire, one of two killed in plane crash

NH Airman Among 2 Killed in Afghanistan Plane Crash

NBC 10 Boston
Published 2 hours ago

A wreckage of a U.S. military aircraft that crashed in Ghazni province, Afghanistan, is seen Monday, Jan. 27, 2020.

A New Hampshire man was one of two airmen killed when an Air Force plane crashed in Afghanistan, the Department of Defense has confirmed.

U.S. forces recovered the service members' remains Tuesday from the site of a plane crash in Afghanistan the day before. Wednesday, the deceased were identified as 30-year-old Capt. Ryan S. Phaneuf of Hudson, New Hampshire, and 46-year-old Lt. Col. Paul K. Voss of Yigo, Guam.

Phaneuf was assigned to the 37th Bomb Squadron at Ellsworth Air Force Base in South Dakota. Voss was assigned to Headquarters Air Combat Command at Joint Base Langley-Eustis in Virginia. Both men were on board the U.S. Bombardier E-11A aircraft that went down Monday in Ghazni Province.
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Veterans outside providers waiting months to get paid?

Pappas talks with VA community about veterans healthcare

Union Leader
By Bea Lewis
Jan 23, 2020

LACONIA — First District Congressman Chris Pappas met with VA community care providers on Thursday and heard about the hurdles veterans and their care providers face, in their efforts to give and receive effective medical treatment.

Louie Fladger, left, of Northwood, was among a group of veterans who met with Congressman Chris Pappas, center, about the benefits of acupuncture when Pappas held a listening session at Gate of Life Acupuncture and Wellness Center in Laconia on Thursday to learn more about the difficulty VA community care providers are having in obtaining reimbursement from the VA. Bea Lewis/Union Leader Correspondent

When veterans need health care that the VA cannot provide, they can obtain services through community care providers. Gate of Life Acupuncture and Wellness in Laconia contacted Pappas’ office because they said they were not receiving payments from the VA in a timely manner for treating veterans for a variety of health issues.

Kathy Twombly, the acupuncture practitioner and massage therapist who runs the Main Street business, said the stalled payments were not only creating a financial hardship, but that billing system obstacles were interrupting the care veterans needed.

“It took three months to get the first payment and represents thousands of dollars,” Twombly said.

Once veterans get a referral for acupuncture, they are allowed 12 visits within 45 days, then eight visits within 83 days and then eight more over 173 days.
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Officer Katie Thyne killed in the line of duty, was Navy veteran from New Hampshire

‘It’s OK to cry’: Emotional Newport News police chief calls officer killed in line of duty a hero

WAVY
by: Sarah Fearing
Posted: Jan 23, 2020

“There is a lot of healing that needs to take place. There is no timetable for that,” said Chief Drew.

Newport News Police Chief Steve Drew holds a news conference to provide details about a deadly traffic stop Thursday night. Officer Katie Thyne died in the line of duty.

NEWPORT NEWS, Va. (WAVY) – Speaking through tears, Newport News Police Chief Steve Drew identified the officer who died in the line of duty Thursday night as Officer Katie Thyne.

Chief Drew provided new information about the investigation and Officer Thyne during a Friday morning news conference.

Officer Thyne was originally from New Hampshire. She was a Navy veteran and a reservist. She joined the Newport News Police Department in 2018 and was assigned to the South Precinct. She leaves behind her mother and stepfather, a brother, her two-year-old daughter, and a loving partner. She was 24-years-old.

While the driver’s side door was open, Chief Drew said the driver accelerated. Officer Thyne was unable to get out of the way and was dragged for about a block. The driver crashed into a tree at Walnut Avenue, pinning Officer Thyne. She died from her injuries at Sentara Norfolk General.
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UPDATE

‘Raegan will know her mother’: Friend, day care provider remembers Officer Katie Thyne

WTKR
BY CHELSEA DONOVAN
JANUARY 27, 2020

NEWPORT NEWS, Va. - "When I leaned her over the casket, I said, 'Kiss your mommy,' and she did and it broke my heart," said Jenifer Locey.

Locey has been providing day care for 2-year-old Raegan Thyne since she was born and had also become great friends with Officer Katie Thyne.

"It's so hard to look at Raegan and know she is not going to see her anymore," said Locey.

Locey described the toddler as innocent, bubbly and always smiling.

"She is just like Katie - always happy, just a spitfire. She is the favorite at daycare," Locey told News 3.
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Long line of police cars escort fallen officer Katie Thyne home

There comes a time when we get sick and tired of being left behind

Leaving behind being left behind

Wounded Times
Kathie Costos
January 1, 2019

There comes a time when we get sick and tired of being left behind. We see others being crushed by circumstances or moved passed the masses as if blessed by a force beyond reason. What do those left behind do when they are not so blessed? Do they stay where they are, as sadness overcomes them, or do they make their own path forward?

We make our own path forward if others will not help us or get out of our way, and then lead the way for others.

My Mom always told me the surest way to get me to do something, was to tell me I could not do it. She was right. I could not look at life as if it was determined by gender. If my two older brothers could do it, so could I.

There was a time when I was about a year old that I thought I would grow up to become a boy.

My Mom took a picture of me in a dress with a football helmet and holding a football. Safe bet I had shinny shoes and lacy ankle socks on instead of cleats. I had no clue girls were not supposed to do something like that.

For the last 37 years working on researching and healing PTSD, I competed in a male dominated field. I worked with veterans, mostly males, even though I am not a veteran. Most say it has been OK since I talk like them. Yet those with the power to help me get the message across, would rather use what I could do for their own benefit, or just take it from me. Much like the football, I have a tight grip on what I want to do and will not let go.

So, here we are in a new year and I found my way to do what I was meant to do because some males finally believed in my ability to do it.

The group that has supported me for over a decade, Point Man International Ministries, decided it is time for me to lead the way for female veterans to begin to heal in their own group. We couldn't wait any longer for this to happen, so when I announced my husband and I were moving to New Hampshire, it was to begin this ministry.

Before I decided to do it, I needed to talk to a few female veterans I knew and they agreed I should do it. Then the hardest challenge was to present the idea to a group of veterans on Rally Point. I was again supported by males. They said as long as I was clear that I am not a veteran, they will take what I say based on my background, which includes being an Army brat and spouse of a veteran. Basically it is in my blood.

While I do not know what it is like to risk my life for someone else, or endure what military women go through, I can understand what it can sometimes do to them. If you read FOR THE LOVE OF JACK HIS WAR MY BATTLE you can catch up on that part.

When we consider that women have done many things they were not supposed to do because they are women, we need to look at the beginning of this country and how they have served in every war, including the Revolutionary War.

"Left to support herself alone, Corbin struggled financially. After she recovered, Corbin joined the Invalid Regiment at West Point, where she aided the wounded until she was formerly discharged in 1783. Then, on July 6, 1779, the Continental Congress, in recognition of her brave service, awarded her with a lifelong pension equivalent to half that of male combatants. Congress also gave her a suit of clothes to replace the ones ruined during the conflict."

After all these years and rich history, one would think, had it not been for women doing things they were not supposed to be able to do, we wouldn't leave any female veteran behind. Well, more and more are deciding they are also leaving behind being left behind, and forging ahead.

Marines have to be able to carry one another if necessary. USMC Cpl. Gabrielle Green hefts a fellow marine as they ready for deployment on a Navy ship at Camp Lejeune, North Carolina. Of the 38,000 recruits who enter the corps each year, about 3,500 are women—or, in USMC phrasing, “female marines.”

Want to be part of this moving ahead place and time? Contact me at 407-754-7526. Yes, I know that is a Florida area code, but I am not changing my number after all these years. I am just changing the focus from mostly male veterans to females.

If you find a great story on females in the military or in the veteran community, email the link to me woundedtimes@aol.com and we can share more of their stories!

Sen. Jeanne Shaheen wants answers for New Hampshire providers of veterans outsourced care

New Hampshire health care providers face long waits for VA reimbursement

New Hampshire Union Leader
By Josie Albertson-Grove
December 20, 2019

“If providers can’t trust that they will be paid in a timely manner, then ultimately it is our veterans who suffer as these providers drop out of the network,” Shaheen wrote, “and veterans receive fewer options for care.”

U.S. Sen. Jeanne Shaheen, D-N.H. KIMBERLEY HAAS/Union Leader Correspondent

WASHINGTON — At least a dozen New Hampshire health care providers are waiting for payments from the Veterans Administration, according to Sen. Jeanne Shaheen’s office. One hospital executive estimated the VA owes about $130 million to providers across the state.

Veterans who get health insurance through the VA do not always get treatment at VA facilities. If a veteran lives too far from a VA hospital, is facing a long wait at the VA, or needs specialized care that their local VA hospital does not offer, he or she can go to another local health care provider. These non-VA providers are known as the Community Care Network. A veteran gets care at one of these providers, and the VA reimburses the provider.

Shaheen’s office has heard complaints from numerous community care network providers across the state about long waits for reimbursement from the VA. Last week, the senator penned a letter to Veterans Affairs Secretary Robert Wilkie last week, expressing concern about the delayed payments, and the backlog she said had caused them. read it here

Real help vs others helping themselves

Getting wrong kind of help worse than none

PTSD Patrol
Kathie Costos
December 3, 2019

If you are wondering why I could not post on this site for a while, it became impossible to be upbeat and share anything encouraging when we were being tortured for trusting the wrong people.

There are people we think we can count on to help us get to where we want to go. It can be devastating to discover we were wrong.

My husband and I decided to sell our house in Florida so that we could move closer to our daughter in New Hampshire. We turned to "friends" we had known for 15 years to sell it. Worst mistake of our lives!

I found a buyers agent to help us in New Hampshire. Catherine Allen was a stranger turned into a blessing. Our house was not getting much attention and she took a look at the listing. Catherine said the pictures were the biggest part of the problem and so was the price.

When I told our "friend" what Catherine said, that was the last time she took my phone call and would not respond to emails. I had no clue what the hell was wrong with her but what made it worse was what it did to us personally knowing that "friends" would treat us like that. 

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After two months, Wounded Times is back in operation

Wounded Times is back

Wounded Times
Kathie Costos
December 1, 2019

After two months, Wounded Times is back in operation...although right now, I do believe only part of my brain arrived in our new home.

September 30th was our 35th anniversary. It was also the day we closed on our old home and headed up north. When the movers closed the door to the truck, we got into the car without a clue where we would end up living.

We headed to a La Quinta because they allow dogs and then I thought about how strange life was. It was our anniversary and I was unemployed because of the move. We were also basically homeless since the house we thought we were going to buy did not do well on the inspection. We had to start the search all over again.

The thought of all of this should have freaked me out but I cracked up laughing. Then I blurted out,"35th anniversary...I am unemployed and homeless! Yahoo! Road trip for our second honeymoon~We knew we had to do this so that we could live closer to our daughter.

I had to leave my job at Fidelity National Title and everyone on our team in Timeshares. After 5 years it was very hard leaving them since they were more than coworkers...they were family too.

Here is the catch up.

Our first real estate agents in Florida sucked big time! The house was over priced and they were not interested in earning their commission. (Never deal with people you think are supposed to be your friends.) The pictures were horrible and they stopped returning my phone calls. Long story short, I had to get a lawyer to get them to cancel the contract. We lost two months with them.

We got another agent Wes Garrison of ReMax and he knew what he was doing so well that he sold the house in less than 2 weeks. He also managed to keep me from losing my mind. He had a professional photographer show up with a drone and the pictures were so good, I was amazed our house could look like that...and we lived there for 15 years.

We lost count on how many people came to see it, but the best part of all is that the buyers were actually people we knew and very glad to know they are in the home we loved.

After we signed the agreement, Hurricane Humberto was going up the east coast, so we had to wait to fly to New Hampshire to find a house. We thought we found a great one just across the Maine border, made an offer, and flew back home. 

The inspection turned out to be lousy and we had to walk away. Since we had already agreed to sell our house, we did not want to go back on our word, so we started packing...and sweating it out.

On the move side we had Catherine Allen of Keller Williams Coastal Realty. Moving over 1,600 miles away is hard, but after the mess the first selling agent put us in, Catherine was a true blessing! She got me through all that with some sanity left, got me through the inspection on the house in Maine killing the deal and then when it was time to search again, she had what we wanted all lined up. 

We spent the first week of October on the road. Then we stayed with our good friends for two more weeks. We started looking the second week in October. Some houses were OK but not what we wanted. 

This house had just listed a couple of days before we saw it and we offered their asking price. They said "yes" and mortgage broker Brad Kelly of Annie Mac and his team were able to get us to the closing table early in November in less than a month after we saw it.

Murray had to be boarded and we missed him so much that we picked him up and went to the Governor's Inn in Rochester. 

All of the staff made the stay memorable. It was amazing how people can be so nice that you can feel as if you are home. I was so comfortable there, I started walking around the grounds with just my socks on to have a cigarette. 

Murray started barking at the guests as if to say "get off my property" and I had a table in the bar for dinner every night since we had to eat in shifts so that Murray was not alone in the room.

It took two more weeks for our things to arrive from the movers and we are still unpacking.

Coming soon is an organized office so that I can find stuff again. Also coming is that Point Man has decided that I will start the first Out Post for female veterans in the area, especially since I am near the border of Maine. Hopefully I will find a location soon and I'll let you know when and where.

During all of this I have kept track of what has been going on with our veterans and I am more pissed off than ever! The news is terrible but too much is being accepted when none of what is going on should be accepted by anyone! With the national media and social media not paying attention to any of it, people run their mouths off with lies and slogans going unchallenged. The truth will only be known if we get as serious about sharing it as the liars have been for far too long.

Plan on daily updates as much as I can while we are still in the process of getting settled...and my brain resuming normal operations again, or at least as close as that can be.

New Hampshire VA urgent care cutting hours? Seriously!

New Hampshire veterans hospital scales back clinic hours

Associated Press
Michael Casey
July 17, 2019

This move comes as the U.S. Department of Veterans Affairs presses for the use of urgent care clinics nationwide as part of the Mission Act that went into effect last month. Critics have expressed concerns that offering more private care could undermine veterans services.

CONCORD, N.H. (AP) — The urgent care facility at New Hampshire's only veterans medical center is reducing its hours, forcing veterans to go elsewhere to get treatment in the evenings and overnight.

The Manchester clinic now offers around-the-clock care but after Aug. 30, it will only accept walk-ins from 8 a.m. to 4:30 a.m. daily. If an eligible veteran needs urgent care outside those hours, center director Alfred Montoya said there are nine other clinics around the state they can go to.

That list is expected to grow.

This move comes as the U.S. Department of Veterans Affairs presses for the use of urgent care clinics nationwide as part of the Mission Act that went into effect last month. Critics have expressed concerns that offering more private care could undermine veterans services.

But Montoya said the move is welcome, and part of an effort to offer even more health care services. The urgent care facility will relocate to a stand-alone building connected to the center. Mental health services will also be offered there.

"This is not privatization," he said. "This is expansion of services, modernization of service in a data-driven, patient safety focus that really brings it all together."
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Robert Craft gave Jarheads $100,000 hugs

Robert Kraft Pledges $100,000 To Families Of Motorcyclists Killed In NH Crash

CBS News Boston
July 13. 2019

“I know you have a GoFundMe page and it said you’re looking to raise 700 (thousand dollars) and you’re somewhere near $560,000, so our family, we’re going to commit $100,000 to that,” Kraft said.

The crowd erupted in cheers.

“And if you don’t get to the 700 today, we’re making it up whatever it is,” the Patriots owner said. “We are all Patriots and you are the true Patriots.”

FOXBORO (CBS/AP) — New England Patriots owner Robert Kraft made a surprise announcement Saturday, as he pledged to donate $100,000 to the families of seven motorcyclists killed in a tragic crash in New Hampshire last month.

More than a thousand bikers came from across the country to Gillette Stadium in Foxboro to celebrate the lives of the men and women who were killed when a pickup truck and trailer crashed into a group of motorcycles in Randolph, New Hampshire on June 21. They were members or supporters of the Jarheads, a New England motorcycle club that includes Marines and their spouses.

Kraft met the group in the parking lot for the event Saturday, which raised money for the families of the victims. When he got up on stage to address the crowd, he made this surprise announcement.
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Massachusetts was warned about Zhukovskyy before Jarheads deaths

Nearly 900 drivers suspended in wake of deadly motorcycle crash in New Hampshire

USA Today
Joey Garrison
July 5, 2019

Connecticut also mailed the Massachusetts RMV as notice, but like thousands of other out-of-state notifications, it was discarded into one of 58 mail bins in a state facility in Quincy, Massachusetts.

BOSTON — The embattled Massachusetts Registry of Motor Vehicles has suspended an additional 330 drivers whose past violations in other states had gone unprocessed after thousands of notices piled up in mail bins inside a registry facility for the past 15 months.

The RMV's lapse in processing out-of-state suspensions was discovered in the aftermath of a horrific crash in Randolph, New Hampshire, in which Volodymyr Zhukovskyy, a 23-year-old truck driver, crossed a double-yellow line, collided with a group of bikers and killed seven motorcyclists.

In all, 876 Massachusetts drivers whose out-of-state traffic infractions had previously been overlooked have now had their licenses suspended in the two weeks since a deadly motorcycle crash in New Hampshire exposed severe deficiencies within the RMV.
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